Things that piss you off that shouldn't

[villa4europe]

Worst I've seen from my time on site was mid winter, freezing cold, bogs are frozen solid... You think that will stop someone? They were obviously that proud of what they'd done they chucked the paper somewhere else, just a lovely human shit curled out on top of the ice 

 

[fightoffyour]

I once left something truly horrific in toilet of the pub by the Guinness factory after quite a few pints of the black stuff. Hope nobody went in there soon after me.

 

 

 

And if you’re waiting to use a long drop at Glastonbury, you certainly don’t want to be going in one that a woman comes out of.

Edited May 18, 2021 by fightoffyour

[Chindie]

Everyone's heard my experiences of toilet horrors, but to reiterate some greatest hits...

Office toilet. Open cubicle door to be confronted by a foul stench and the vision of what appeared to be a cremated pineapple poking out of a sea of rancid gravy. To this day I've no idea how someone managed to give birth to a rugby ball of solid shit.

Office toilet. Entire floor soaked in piss. Literally splashing through it to get to the urinals. Paper towels floating in it.

Office toilet. Toilet seat in cubicle broken perfectly in 2, like it had been sawn.

Office toilet. Right hand cubicle wall covered in smeared snot, left hand wall covered in smeared blood.

Office toilet. Pool of piss around the toilet, leading to a trail of piss towards to the door, and on locking the door discovering the handle was wet.

Office toilet. Wall next to the urinals caked in smeared snot. Later chipped off by a cleaner with a wallpaper scraper.

Cinema toilet. Nugget of shit on an arse crack shaped bed of skidmarks, served with a piss jus artistically arranged on the back of the seat.

McDonald's toilet. Piss coated bottle of Famous Grouse presented lovingly on the seat.

Office toilet. Turd python climbing out of a mound of paper and onto the seat.

Office toilet. Nuggets of shit on the wall.

[Xela]

We all love @Chindie's tales of toilet terror. 

A fantastic fetid foray into faecal faux pas.

[Robtaylor200]

13 hours ago, sidcow said:

One of my strongest memories of Cairo was seeing a large ancient looking wooden cart being pushed through the streets covered in raw chicken (I think) meat in direct sunlight at about 35 degrees c. 

It's not a country you ever want to be going to the toilet with a single sheet of toilet paper. 

Incidentally anything you buy from a street urchin In Egypt costs 1.

1 dollar / 1 Euro / 1 Pound. They really don't deal in exchange rates. 

This was a few years ago now mind.  Maybe everything costs 2 now. 

 

Now here is something that did piss me off that shouldn't. Ever since I was about 11, I wanted to see the Pyramids etc. I read and watched everything about Egypt. Could never really afford to go until my second marriage, me and Mrs T went for our honeymoon. At the time she was 44 blonde, blue eyed and curvy (she still has blue eyes) I hated nearly every single second I spent there . They would not stop grabbing Mrs T and calling her Shakira. Every one trying to rip us off, even the policeman in Cairo helped us get over the road and then held out his hand and said Diniro. Every shop, every time we went out tried to drag us in. Went on a trip to the Pyramids (after first going to a perfume shop) graffiti all over them. They grabbed hold of her in Old Sharm and I kicked off, then surrounded by stall holders. Police turned up and dispersed them (stall holders were giving the police money ( I was told it was to stop them shutting their stalls for harassing us) Chap who was with us told me to keep quiet or I could be arrested and then who would look after Mrs T. It is the only place in the world that I did not feel that I could protect my wife. I would never go again if I won a free holiday.

Also I am always reminded that I left Mrs T by the pool on her own for two hours. Well it was Villa vs Blues on the TV at the nearby pub. Won 1:0 Gabby scored from controversial penalty 

[villa4europe]

I went to sharm and my brief experience of the town was exactly the same, only went to go to the hard Rock cafe for some food and a decent beer, thought it would make sense to get some tat whilst I was there... Huge mistake, you walk in to look at a fridge magnet for my gran, took 30 mins+, got offered everything bar his socks 

The looky looky men accusing you of being rude cut me to the core "I just want to talk about football, you're very rude English man" from the guy juggling cartons of knock off cigarettes 

Edited May 19, 2021 by villa4europe

[ender4]

1 hour ago, Robtaylor200 said:

Now here is something that did piss me off that shouldn't. Ever since I was about 11, I wanted to see the Pyramids etc. I read and watched everything about Egypt. Could never really afford to go until my second marriage, me and Mrs T went for our honeymoon. At the time she was 44 blonde, blue eyed and curvy (she still has blue eyes) I hated nearly every single second I spent there . They would not stop grabbing Mrs T and calling her Shakira. Every one trying to rip us off, even the policeman in Cairo helped us get over the road and then held out his hand and said Diniro. Every shop, every time we went out tried to drag us in. Went on a trip to the Pyramids (after first going to a perfume shop) graffiti all over them. They grabbed hold of her in Old Sharm and I kicked off, then surrounded by stall holders. Police turned up and dispersed them (stall holders were giving the police money ( I was told it was to stop them shutting their stalls for harassing us) Chap who was with us told me to keep quiet or I could be arrested and then who would look after Mrs T. It is the only place in the world that I did not feel that I could protect my wife. I would never go again if I won a free holiday.

Also I am always reminded that I left Mrs T by the pool on her own for two hours. Well it was Villa vs Blues on the TV at the nearby pub. Won 1:0 Gabby scored from controversial penalty 

yep, there's not many places like Cairo/Luxor. The amount of hassle me and my wife got was unbelievable.  and it felt like everyone was trying to rip you off. 

I would recommend doing a pre-organised tour if anyone is planning to go there.

[sidcow]

The one which concerned me were the blokes on horses in traditional desert clothing around the pyramids.  They kept pulling dramatic poses on their horses inviting to you take a photo of them (which cost 1).

Then they would offer to "take you into the desert" on the back of their horses to see another pyramid a bit further away.   They kept repeating this offer over and over again.   I wonder how may suckers take up that offer only to be charged some serious wonga to be brought back from wherever they took them into the desert.

I understand they have cleaned up the area immediately surrounding the pyramids now and stopped a lot of the rapscallions from operating there.

My wife is blonde too but we managed to avoid most of that badgering as we never really left the tourist groups.

We basically got a ship over from Cyprus and arrived in Alexandria.  When we disembarked we were straight onto a bus which was part of a convoy.   The guide said on the intercom "You may have noticed we have an armed guard.  No need to worry this is just a precaution"   I thought to myself, a) if they need to take a precaution, there is a danger surely? and b) that funnily enough at no time in the brochures or booking process was armed guards mentioned.

On the way back when we went down for breakfast a couple we had met asked us if we had heard the news?  The exact same convoy of buses we were in had been attacked by petrol bombs the following day and some German tourists had been killed.  We were just 1 day away.

Obviously there have been more issues in Egypt since and worse.  Glad I went, will never go again.

[BOF]

16 hours ago, sidcow said:

]Incidentally anything you buy from a street urchin In Egypt costs 1.

1 dollar / 1 Euro / 1 Pound. They really don't deal in exchange rates.

The disappointment when I take out my Dong.

[rjw63]

14 hours ago, Xela said:

We all love @Chindie's tales of toilet terror. 

A fantastic fetid foray into faecal faux pas.

Wrong picture to follow that line I've bolded, should have been this chap (old timers will know why)...

[HanoiVillan]

29 minutes ago, BOF said:

The disappointment when I take out my Dong.

Oh well, at least you should be familiar with those disappointed facial expressions

[BOF]

39 minutes ago, HanoiVillan said:

Oh well, at least you should be familiar with those disappointed facial expressions

I set them up for the rest of you

[tomav84]

16 hours ago, Chindie said:

Everyone's heard my experiences of toilet horrors, but to reiterate some greatest hits...

Office toilet. Open cubicle door to be confronted by a foul stench and the vision of what appeared to be a cremated pineapple poking out of a sea of rancid gravy. To this day I've no idea how someone managed to give birth to a rugby ball of solid shit.

Office toilet. Entire floor soaked in piss. Literally splashing through it to get to the urinals. Paper towels floating in it.

Office toilet. Toilet seat in cubicle broken perfectly in 2, like it had been sawn.

Office toilet. Right hand cubicle wall covered in smeared snot, left hand wall covered in smeared blood.

Office toilet. Pool of piss around the toilet, leading to a trail of piss towards to the door, and on locking the door discovering the handle was wet.

Office toilet. Wall next to the urinals caked in smeared snot. Later chipped off by a cleaner with a wallpaper scraper.

Cinema toilet. Nugget of shit on an arse crack shaped bed of skidmarks, served with a piss jus artistically arranged on the back of the seat.

McDonald's toilet. Piss coated bottle of Famous Grouse presented lovingly on the seat.

Office toilet. Turd python climbing out of a mound of paper and onto the seat.

Office toilet. Nuggets of shit on the wall.

where the **** do you work?!

[Chindie]

4 minutes ago, tomav84 said:

where the **** do you work?!

That's the greatest hits of various offices over 6 or 7 years or so of working in Brum.

[blandy]

12 minutes ago, tomav84 said:

where the **** do you work?!

St Andrews was my guess.

[chrisp65]

14 minutes ago, tomav84 said:

where the **** do you work?!

I believe he’s a big noise in product development at Nando’s.

 

[BOF]

45 minutes ago, chrisp65 said:

I believe he’s a big noise in product development at Nando’s.

Product development at Nandos. About as fulfilling a job as indicator installer at BMW.

[Brumstopdogs]

10 hours ago, Chindie said:

That's the greatest hits of various offices over 6 or 7 years or so of working in Brum.

Did you miss out a letter?

[Genie]

I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea but I loved Friends back in the day, and still now enjoy an re-run when there’s not much else on.

It’s so sad seeing Mathew Perry in the recent Friends reunion trailer. He’s struggled with a lot of drink and drug addiction since the show ended and doesn’t look, or speak well. 
Around 2m 30sec and 5m 20sec

 

[sidcow]

3 minutes ago, Genie said:

I know it’s not everyone’s cup of tea but I loved Friends back in the day, and still now enjoy an re-run when there’s not much else on.

It’s so sad seeing Mathew Perry in the recent Friends reunion trailer. He’s struggled with a lot of drink and drug addiction since the show ended and doesn’t look, or speak well. 
Around 2m 30sec and 5m 20sec

 

Nothing wrong with liking Friends, it's a top quality sitcom and anyone who says different is just a miserable clearing in the woods. 

I saw some stills from this on the BBC website earlier and my first thought was that he looked a right state.  He's had issues for over 25 years now so it's bound to take its toll. 

Edit - just looked up the blokes ages and he's the youngest by a couple of years. Looks 10 years older. 

Edited May 20, 2021 by sidcow