Liverpool

[The_Rev]

They look awful again tonight.   It seems to me that the 2013/14 team was very much like the 2008/09 team, a bunch of average cloggers who were being constantly bailed out by a couple of star names. 

[Guest av1]

Oh god here we go.

[Avfc96]

Gerrard wankfest incoming from the media and the scouse.

 

Over rated set piece specialist

Edited January 5, 2015 by Avfc96

[foreveryoung]

Brendon cracked me up in his post match interview something along the lines of "Gerrard is world class, yeah he is old, he's got tired legs, fatigue, phisicality, his got grey hair but he is top class". Ok maybe not the the bit about his grey hair!!

[heid3ster]

 

I’ve made up my mind, I’m leaving” and with that Steven Gerrard walked out of Anfield for the last time, leaving Rick Parry, Rafael Benitez and David Moores crestfallen having lost their skipper. The press were full of the stories about Stevie’s decision to leave, and the move to Chelsea seemed imminent, as Benitez began planning a replacement for Gerrard in earnest, Stevie returned to his humble home on Merseyside (ok, not so humble, but its kinda fitting in with the original story….)

[sNIP]

http://www.redandwhitekop.com/forum/index.php?topic=78144.0

Truly disturbing.

 

 

Is this what makes Liverpool a bigger club than us? Our lack of fanfiction?

[AVFCforever1991]

They look awful again tonight.   It seems to me that the 2013/14 team was very much like the 2008/09 team, a bunch of average cloggers who were being constantly bailed out by a couple of star names. 

 

Pretty much this, I think it was obvious last year when they winning games 5-2 or 3-2 and drawing with palace 3-3..

 

Their poor defence was covered up by a great strike force, and it's showing now when they don't have Suarez to bail them out or even Sturridge.

[Seat68]

Gerrard scores two against a league 2 side, this shows he is world class, world class I tell you.

[Eames]

Gerrard scores two against a league 2 side, this shows he is world class, world class I tell you.

He should still be able to knock in free kicks like that into his 50s. Should Liverpool keep him until then? 

 

Its so **** boring. Gerrard has never been, isn't and will never be a world class footballer. He has been the the best player in a mediocre team for Liverpool and hopeless for England. Were it not for the local mafia threatening to break his legs and scousers burning shirts in Stanley Park he'd have been a Chelsea player for longer than he has been a Liverpool one. 

 

Interesting that ever since noone, even the big European sides have come in for him? Surely if he was "World Class" Real, Barca, AC Milan etc would have been knocking the door down trying to sign him.

 

A limited but very influential player. 

[Stevo985]

World Class is very subjective, so I often refrain from using it.

 

But I would say Gerrard has been a fantastic player. I'm sure if he'd wanted to leave LIverpool then the offers would have been there.

 

Was he "world class"? No I don't think so. I don't think he was ever one of the best players in the world.

But he was excellent. The love in is sickening, and yes he probably is overrated, but that's to be expected.

 

But I think some on here are underrating him. He was a very very good player.

[lapal_fan]

Yup, you don't score the goals from midfield as he has without being an extremely talented player. 

 

He's got one of the best right foots in the business, and until 4 years ago he had the engine to go with it.

 

But he still wouldn't be anywhere near my world 11, even in his prime.

[TrentVilla]

He wasn't even the best midfielder in the North West of England for the majority of his career.

[omariqy]

He wasn't even the best midfielder at Liverpool during his peak years. #Alonso

[Jimzk5]

He wasn't even the best midfielder at Liverpool during his peak years. #Alonso

Salif Diao says hi

[Demitri_C]

what does everyone make of ade akinfenwa's comments about liverpool after the game?

 

 i thought was refreshing change in my view openly saying how much of a fan he is of liverpool growing up

[PaulC]

World Class is very subjective, so I often refrain from using it.

 

But I would say Gerrard has been a fantastic player. I'm sure if he'd wanted to leave LIverpool then the offers would have been there.

 

Was he "world class"? No I don't think so. I don't think he was ever one of the best players in the world.

But he was excellent. The love in is sickening, and yes he probably is overrated, but that's to be expected.

 

But I think some on here are underrating him. He was a very very good player.

 

Yes that sums him up very well indeed. 

[The Fun Factory]

I think Gerrard needs to shut up about his situation. No player, now matter how amazing they are are ever bigger than the club. I don't know what he expected the club to say when you will be 35 in the summer and in notable decline, albeit from a high level. Anyway I am sure we are going to have 5 months of this rubbish now.

[villa4europe]

This I would have signed a new contract in the summer headline, utter bollocks and very inconsiderate of him IMO that's the plastics on Rodgers and the boards backs, the secondary comments that he didn't want to be a squad player, well that's what you are, Rodgers had to play a midfield 3 last year to carry him, England in the summer showed him up, he simply can't play in a 2 anymore at this level, my understanding is then due to FFP they offered him squad player wages, mr Liverpool showing you where his loyalty lies again

[foreveryoung]

World Class is very subjective, so I often refrain from using it.

 

But I would say Gerrard has been a fantastic player. I'm sure if he'd wanted to leave LIverpool then the offers would have been there.

 

Was he "world class"? No I don't think so. I don't think he was ever one of the best players in the world.

But he was excellent. The love in is sickening, and yes he probably is overrated, but that's to be expected.

 

But I think some on here are underrating him. He was a very very good player.

He was that good, he really was. But world class, he wasn't that good

[YLN]

Christian Benteke looked over at me. I'm not sure why I was in his house, and I wasn't sure if he really wanted me there, but there I almost certainly was. Christian started to cry. 'What's wrong Christian?' I asked, not really sure if it was my place to ask, or indeed what my place was. What was I doing there? Christian poured himself some Powerade into a glass. The blue stuff. I'd never seen anyone drink Powerade not from the bottle before. He swirled it around the glass. His demeanor had slightly changed from since he was crying, literally seconds previously.

'I suppose you're wondering what you're doing in my house', he said with a wry smile. His English was excellent. I was worried it wouldn't be, because I didn't know any French or Flemish or whatever. Congoan?

'I was wondering that, yes', I replied, looking around for maybe something for me to swirl, or at least pour.

'Ha ha', he said very very strangely, as if he was reading it from a screen behind my head. Was he laughing? Was he sneezing? Was he just reading from a script someone had prepared. I felt like I was on some sort of excellent ghost train. I've only been on a ghost train once and it was terrible. This must be what a good one is like I thought. 'I want you to play for Aston Villa', he continued.

'Right'

'I know you haven't played much football since you did your knee in that ski accident two years ago'

'How did you...?', I spluttered, pretending that I'd been drinking something, like a coffee or whatever. Christian may be a decent striker but he was an awful host. He was now standing on his head. 'How did you stand on your head like that?'

'This Powerade is really great stuff', he said as he began to laugh, properly this time. A bit like Dorian out of The Mask. 'If the cops are looking for The Mask, then lets give him The Mask', Christian didn't say. Dorian Tyrell said it in that film. Christian to the best of my recollection wasn't in the film. He would have been four years old.

'Can I have some?', I asked. I was really very thirsty watching him drink glass after glass and stand on his head. It was really making me very thirsty. Also he had one of those very old air conditioners that sort of dry out the room. 'Do you mind turning off that air conditioner please, I'm prone to Legionnaire's Disease.

'No and no', he replied sort of briskly as if I wasn't giving him a chance to say the thing that he wanted to say.

'Listen why am I here? Is this the Congo? Have you brought me to your gaff in the Congo?', I started to get a little bit annoyed. Christian went back to standing on his feet. This was a less gracious manoevre and he knocked over the coffee table as he performed it.

'Ha ha ha', he said again. I rolled my eyes. 'I want you to play for Aston Villa instead of me. Paul Lambert is on board and everything'. He wheeled out a small cage that Paul Lambert had been squeezed into. 'Paul says hi'.

Paul said 'hi', but in a squeaky voice, like a man trapped in a very small cage.

'Are you a bit uncomfortable in there Paul?', I asked. 'Is he holding you here against your will?'. Christian laughed a big belly laugh that shook the walls of this sort of extravagant mud hut, that now that I looked was filled with small cages containing all previous Aston Villa managers. Many of them were skeletons, but some of them were men in complete agony. One of the Graham Taylors was especially miserable. 'You look a bit like my uncle Graham',

'Thanks son', came both Grahams' reply. 'Can you help me?'

'Stop talking to Graham Taylor', came a sort of pathetic scream from what I can only assume was the kitchen of the hut. Doug Ellis appeared wearing some variety of rude apron and a full suit under it. He was holding a holiday brochure for The Congo. 'It's not really what I'm looking for', he said as an aside to Benteke and pushed the brochure into his belly. In his other hand he was holding a tray of drinks. 'Din Dins' he said to the managers who were in the cages. He passed me a Ribena. and began to push straws through the cartons of Ensure Plus and pass them around to all the currently alive managers. 'David O'Leary is one of my favourites', Doug said as he tickled David's little chin. He scored that penalty for Ireland didn't he? You must love him'.

'Yeah he's alright. I think he tipped someone I know once, or something. I'm not big on details'.

'That's exactly why you're perfect for Aston Villa', interrupted Benteke. 'We've literally no idea what we're doing one minute to the next. Look at this'. Christian took a small figurine out of his pocket. It was a miniature action man that looked like he might have gotten it in a Happy Meal. 'I got this in a Happy Meal. I don't know why. We were thinking of putting it up front for Aston Villa in the League Cup next season. We thought you were giving us a sign'. Doug took his apron off. Then he took his jacket off. Then he put his jacket back on and turned the air conditioner off. We all watched him do this. He was happy we were watching. He couldn't help but smile. Until he could and then he stopped smiling.

'I get very lonely he said. I get so terribly lonely. That's why I've done this', Doug cried.

'What have you done Doug?', I asked becoming a bit afraid. My Ribena was gone and I felt like I wanted to brush my teeth. I hoped Christian had packed me a toothbrush. I looked over to him and made a 'brushing my teeth' gesture with my finger. He shook his head. Bollocks. Doug waited for our impromptu game of charades to finish up and then continued.

'I created this with my mind. All of this. Everything you see. The cages, Benteke, the walls, Paul Lambert's tongue piercing. Everything'. Paul stuck his tongue out and tried to waggle it from side to side, but just ended up shaking his head.

'Are you OK Paul?', Alex McLeish asked. His cage was facing right at Lambert's. 'I think Paul is having one of his turns'.

'Going through the change in my pocket!', retorted Brian Little excitedly, before looking quite confused about why he had done. 'Sorry lads I think that's the punchline to another joke I heard once. Sorry. Carry on.'

'Morale is at an all time low', continued Doug. 'These managers get no exercise, they keep having little strokes from being stuck in those cages all day. It's just...'. Doug paused as though he thought he heard a noise outside or he had forgotten what he was going to say. He would never let on. What a pro. 'It's just.. I can't create outdoors with my mind. I don't know why. I've seen outdoors. I know what it looks like, but I can't create it.'

'So if you can't create it, then why... Hold on. If you're creating all of this, are you creating me too? Am I just a figment of your imagination?'

'Yes'

'So then why and how am I narrating this. Shouldn't you be narrating this? Shouldn't this all be coming from your perspective? It doesn't make any sense if I don't really exist, but yet I have an internal monologue'.

He was right. it was mistakes like this that were costing these managers their chance at any quality of life within my sphere of reality, but I was a very old man. No one wanted to hear what I had to say, especially not within my own head, where all thought is wrapped in a sort of tartan scarf. The inside of my head was full of mushy cobwebby brains, not fresh lamb's brains like this guy. It would have to be from his perspective. I had no choice. I would take it back when the time was right.

I was back. For a moment I had stopped thinking. I stood vacant, reacting to things, but not actually having anything going on in my mind. Like a robotic hoover. I understood it all now, and what I would have to do. I checked my mental home to see if anything had changed. There was a slightly greater desire to read Heat magazine, but aside from that it was exactly the same.

'Christian you haven't said anything in a while', Doug and I said in unison. There were still some creases to be ironed out in terms of who was going to say what and when, and whether or not anyone in the room had a different personality. Christian laughed again. I think that was the extent of his personality. That big laugh that he does. He wandered into one of the bedrooms and started getting very very angry. 'This is your house Christian. Do you mind if we stay out here a bit?' I asked. Suddenly his English was completely gone. He began to talk in Belgian, which was a language Doug thought existed. But if I knew that it wasn't really a language, then surely he did too, after all there was only him.

'Yes that is peculiar', he said. He was reading my thoughts. He was also creating them, so I couldn't be too angry about it. He was sort of proofreading them.

 

Are we a big club yet?

 

[NurembergVillan]

Tl; dr.