Things that piss you off that shouldn't

[Xela]

9 hours ago, snowychap said:

Searches?

Maybe

 

[bickster]

It should not be that hard to say your address into a phone

House number, Street, Suburb in that sodding order

It is not suburb, House number, Street or Street Suburb House number or any other combo of the three required elements

Also a machine does not give a flying f*** for your poiliteness so people could stop saying please and thank-you or Can I have a Taxi, the machine knows you want a taxi because you've already told us that by phoning up in the first place

My boss obviously wants the failure rate to come down, I've already dropped it from over 60% to nearly 40%. He asked me what would make the biggest difference now. I told him improved education for the masses

There are a couple of roads in Liverpool that have been pedestrianised to allow restaurants and cafes to go continental and have outside areas, doesn't stop people trying to order cabs for the middle of that street. These people are most likely sat in the f***ing road

There's a local landmark in Liverpool called the Bombed Out Church and it's a popular request but we haven't sent cabs directly to there for over a decade after a request by the Police / Council. We send them to RIcher Sounds, Which is literally right next to it but the cars pull up in the side street so as not to block the bus stop and the road. They request it for the BOC and the machine repeats back to them Richer Sounds, they decline and speak to an operator, who then tells them we pick up at Richer Sonds for that location and they book. Did they learn from this experience? Did they hell, they do exactly the same thing next week or even the next night.

People are stupid, Grrrrr

[limpid]

7 minutes ago, bickster said:

It should not be that hard to say your address into a phone

House number, Street, Suburb in that sodding order

It is not suburb, House number, Street or Street Suburb House number or any other combo of the three required elements

Also a machine does not give a flying f*** for your poiliteness so people could stop saying please and thank-you or Can I have a Taxi, the machine knows you want a taxi because you've already told us that by phoning up in the first place

My boss obviously wants the failure rate to come down, I've already dropped it from over 60% to nearly 40%. He asked me what would make the biggest difference now. I told him improved education for the masses

There are a couple of roads in Liverpool that have been pedestrianised to allow restaurants and cafes to go continental and have outside areas, doesn't stop people trying to order cabs for the middle of that street. These people are most likely sat in the f***ing road

There's a local landmark in Liverpool called the Bombed Out Church and it's a popular request but we haven't sent cabs directly to there for over a decade after a request by the Police / Council. We send them to RIcher Sounds, Which is literally right next to it but the cars pull up in the side street so as not to block the bus stop and the road. They request it for the BOC and the machine repeats back to them Richer Sounds, they decline and speak to an operator, who then tells them we pick up at Richer Sonds for that location and they book. Did they learn from this experience? Did they hell, they do exactly the same thing next week or even the next night.

People are stupid, Grrrrr

what3words.com

[Stevo985]

46 minutes ago, limpid said:

what3words.com

Yep. The world will be using that soon

[chrisp65]

Its not going to solve the BOC / Richer sounds problem. It’ll compound it.

 

[bickster]

1 hour ago, chrisp65 said:

Its not going to solve the BOC / Richer sounds problem. It’ll compound it.

 

I tend to agree. However I may have come up with a solution for that problem, it may take a few hundredths of a percentage point off the failure rate... we'll see tonight I guess

Three little words actually seems too specific and I'm struggling with people that can't say an actual address in the correct order or order for obviously innaccessible places. These people can't even pronounce Parthenon correctly or even Malvern. Hell Towcester is real challenge

And don't get me started on Voice Recognition, Scousers and Welsh words. Between Google and Scousers, Llanwrst might as well be pronounced washing machine

[Genie]

4 hours ago, bickster said:

It should not be that hard to say your address into a phone

House number, Street, Suburb in that sodding order

It is not suburb, House number, Street or Street Suburb House number or any other combo of the three required elements

Also a machine does not give a flying f*** for your poiliteness so people could stop saying please and thank-you or Can I have a Taxi, the machine knows you want a taxi because you've already told us that by phoning up in the first place

My boss obviously wants the failure rate to come down, I've already dropped it from over 60% to nearly 40%. He asked me what would make the biggest difference now. I told him improved education for the masses

There are a couple of roads in Liverpool that have been pedestrianised to allow restaurants and cafes to go continental and have outside areas, doesn't stop people trying to order cabs for the middle of that street. These people are most likely sat in the f***ing road

There's a local landmark in Liverpool called the Bombed Out Church and it's a popular request but we haven't sent cabs directly to there for over a decade after a request by the Police / Council. We send them to RIcher Sounds, Which is literally right next to it but the cars pull up in the side street so as not to block the bus stop and the road. They request it for the BOC and the machine repeats back to them Richer Sounds, they decline and speak to an operator, who then tells them we pick up at Richer Sonds for that location and they book. Did they learn from this experience? Did they hell, they do exactly the same thing next week or even the next night.

People are stupid, Grrrrr

You need to engineer your system to work with people, rather than get people to work with your system.

If you make that switch then you’ll be less stressed about people not getting it.

[lapal_fan]

Soccer AM has influenced people to such a degree, I absolutely hate anything to do with football, outside of football.

Bantz innit.

If someone does something good, cover your mouth, open your eyes and scream "OooooooooooOooOoOoohhhhhhhh!!"

Calling the top corners of goals "top bins", calling skills "tekkers".

I just hope they all **** off and die.

[rjw63]

Taking the wife's car for it's first service.

Yeah, I know it's only once every two years now but nearly £250 for an oil change and some checks.

Robbery!

[Paddywhack]

I'm pretty busy today, working from home.

My cat keeps walking over my keyboard, nudging my hand and moving the mouse, dribbling on arm, meowing in my face and sticking his head in my mug and drinking my tea.

I can hear my baby boy in the next room crying his eyes out, my wife's trying to calm him down.

Next door are having an extension and the banging is so loud my house is vibrating.

I can't believe I'm saying this but I'd rather be back in the office listening to Karen talk about her blind date on the weekend.

[mottaloo]

On 21/08/2020 at 17:55, Xela said:

The indication from our office is that its unlikely we'll be back this side of Christmas

I'm not sure I want to go back! Got into a nice routine working from home now. 

 

[Amsterdam_Neil_D]

36 minutes ago, Paddywhack said:

I can't believe I'm saying this but I'd rather be back in the office listening to Karen talk about her blind date on the weekend.

I think we will keep this nice and safe for a few weeks after you go back.

I expect the blind dates to dry up for someone called "Karen" though.

Also,  can a "Karen" have a blind date ? These are the people who say "Don't you know who I am" a lot ?

 

[StefanAVFC]

 

[Paddywhack]

13 minutes ago, StefanAVFC said:

 

Janie has put her swear word in the wrong place. It should be unbe-fkin-lievable.

She needs to learn English.

[Davkaus]

One of these morons is accusing them of trying to "erase history", as he boycotts them for...remembering history?

 

[Stevo985]

The only logic that occurs with these people is "Any discussion of Slavery/racism = SNOWFLAKE WOKE LEFTY YOU MUST BE WRONG"

[Xela]

On 22/08/2020 at 20:46, lapal_fan said:

Soccer AM has influenced people to such a degree, I absolutely hate anything to do with football, outside of football.

Bantz innit.

If someone does something good, cover your mouth, open your eyes and scream "OooooooooooOooOoOoohhhhhhhh!!"

Calling the top corners of goals "top bins", calling skills "tekkers".

I just hope they all **** off and die.

Its an oldie but this always makes me laugh. WSC review of Tim Lovejoy's book

https://www.wsc.co.uk/the-archive/42-Media/145-no-love-no-joy

Quote

Chopped into “chapters” that barely fill a page, in a font size usually associated with books for the partially sighted, Lovejoy on Football is part autobiography, part witless musing, and one more triumph for the crass stupidity rapidly replacing culture in this country. Hopelessly banal and nauseatingly self-assured, smirkingly unfunny, it’s a £300 T-shirt, a piss-you-off ringtone, a YouTube clip of someone drinking their mate’s vomit. Its smugness is a corollary of its vacuity. I hope it makes you sick.

 

[lapal_fan]

15 minutes ago, Xela said:

Its an oldie but this always makes me laugh. WSC review of Tim Lovejoy's book

https://www.wsc.co.uk/the-archive/42-Media/145-no-love-no-joy

 

Weirdly, I had a twitter convo with Max Rushden last night (I don't know him, but he worked on the show) and told him it was pretty pants. 

 

[Chindie]

I tend not to have the lights on in most parts of the house at night. I watch TV in the dark in the living room. It helps visual pop on the TV. 

Just now, just about to turn the PS4 off, I notice a dark splodge in the dark in the corner of my vision. It's on the wall. The wall is perhaps, 8 feet from me. And it's dark. And I can see the splodge move. I focus on the wall, shine my phone light at the wall and see in clarity a **** enormous spider. This thing is so big it's taking the piss. Being one of those issue idiots raised to not kill spiders I run into the kitchen to grab a jar and fishermen flattened cereal box from the the recycling. The thing doesn't seem to move that fast and seems mostly to have been trying to inch across the wall so I'm not too hurried. As I turn back towards the living room I hear a light, plastic 'thwack'. 

The wall next to the TV, as my house is in semi permanent refurb, has a bunch of stuff temporarily piled against it. One of those things is in a thick plastic bag. Said bag is directly under where thunder bastard was climbing. Was being the important word because it wasn't there anymore. Immediately my mind realises what's happened. The word removed has fallen off the wall whilst trying to negotiate a tricky overhang in the shape of the window sill and has fallen, hit the bag with a worrying solid whack and now it's somewhere in the pile. Shit.

Right. I grab a waylaid hobby painting stick, a kebab stick really, and begin carefully flicking and nudging the assorted bags boxes and parcels against the wall. The technique is threefold - the sudden movement I hope might spook the squatting spider into running for freedom and let me get it. I also hope this will let me carefully move stuff without the entire thing collapsing. And finally I don't **** want to grab a hidden edge of a box to be greeted by the crunch of my finger giving a monstrous spider a headache.

20 minutes of careful disassembly of the pile later, and my living room looks like a bombsite (well, more than usual) and there's no **** spider. Shit.

I also need to go to bed but knowing I'm sharing the house with an obnoxiously big spider makes be think there's unfinished business. I start piling the crap back up quickly and admit defeat. I place the last couple of bits back against the wall, glance at my phone to see how long I've spent in this fruitless hunt (...too long) and turn to turn the lights off.

The spider is watching me from the light switch.

...**** it is big.

I look at the jar on the window sill. Homepride Pasta Bake. Hmm. Bastard ain't gonna fit.

I look at the spider again.

It looks at me.

We both make a decision.

I swing the folded up cereal box at the wall. It turns into Neo, bolts off the wall, into the floor, dodges the stamp, and scrapers behind the pile.

**** it. You win this round spider. But next time you're getting smeared across the plaster you word removed.

 

[HanoiVillan]

12 hours ago, StefanAVFC said:

 

It will probably not surprise you that Mad Mel has got a column out of it:

Non-British readers might be baffled to discover that this woman, writing in the nation's oldest and most establishment newspaper - our equivalent of The New York Times - was approvingly cited by Anders Breivik in his manifesto, and yet here she still is.