Wainy316 Posted April 6, 2016 Share Posted April 6, 2016 3 hours ago, PieFacE said: So something incredibly funny but also quite embarrassing happened last night between me and my girlfriend, and I feel like I need to tell someone so VT, I'm telling you. We arranged for her to come over to mine for a curry which I made from scratch. All the good stuff was involved in this curry, peppers, onions, chili, chicken pieces etc, and it tasted amazing! It was pretty hot too but that didn't seem to phase her which was good. Anyway, after a few glasses of wine we make our way into the bedroom, get undressed, and start the foreplay which was good fun. Here's the part where it got a bit troublesome..... Little did I know, I still had chili all over my fingers, and my fingers went into a very sensitive area (Not UTWU Rob before you ask), which lead to me laughing my head off at the situation and her laughing but also nearly in tears. Apparently it's pretty painful and extremely hot. Many ice cubes were sacrificed. I offered to pour milk over it but apparently that's weird?!? TL;DR version - Don't handle Chili before sex!!! Or you know, wash your hands properly afterwards... Or rub your eye, or go for a piss. PS. I thought you were a veggie? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PieFacE Posted April 6, 2016 VT Supporter Share Posted April 6, 2016 I am yeah, Quorn chicken pieces But yeah, think I'll start using gloves when handling chili in the future,... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 Ok an embarassing one now.. has anyone had a woman play with their "soldier" too hard/violently before? I noticed that I had a bit of blood on my boxers today and so I tested erm playing with it myself and when it gets hard it starts bleeding abit. Have I got anything to worry about? i am abit embarassed to go GP. This can only happen to me Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Wainy316 Posted April 12, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted April 12, 2016 AIDS 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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Rugeley Villa Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 4 hours ago, Demitri_C said: Ok an embarassing one now.. has anyone had a woman play with their "soldier" too hard/violently before? I noticed that I had a bit of blood on my boxers today and so I tested erm playing with it myself and when it gets hard it starts bleeding abit. Have I got anything to worry about? i am abit embarassed to go GP. This can only happen to me pfffft ive had bigger cuts on my....oh wait. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 4 hours ago, Demitri_C said: Ok an embarassing one now.. has anyone had a woman play with their "soldier" too hard/violently before? I noticed that I had a bit of blood on my boxers today and so I tested erm playing with it myself and when it gets hard it starts bleeding abit. Have I got anything to worry about? i am abit embarassed to go GP. This can only happen to me Did she wank you off with a brillo pad wrapped around her hand? Can't say i have ever experienced that but if she was gripping it too hard I would have told her! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC_Hitz Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 Luckily I did my own banjo at an early age. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mikeyp102 Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 5 hours ago, Demitri_C said: Ok an embarassing one now.. has anyone had a woman play with their "soldier" too hard/violently before? I noticed that I had a bit of blood on my boxers today and so I tested erm playing with it myself and when it gets hard it starts bleeding abit. Have I got anything to worry about? i am abit embarassed to go GP. This can only happen to me I'm Dem, I'm getting it regularly, but don't want to brag straight out, so have to make up a story to exploit it ;-) 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumstopdogs Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC_Hitz Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 I'd kill for a battered sausage. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted April 12, 2016 Moderator Share Posted April 12, 2016 On 4/6/2016 at 13:50, PieFacE said: I am yeah, Quorn chicken pieces Wasn't a Quorn girlfriend too was it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 12, 2016 Share Posted April 12, 2016 1 hour ago, mikeyp102 said: I'm Dem, I'm getting it regularly, but don't want to brag straight out, so have to make up a story to exploit it ;-) I actually wish I was making it up. I can't even bash my bishop without it bleeding 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 10 hours ago, Demitri_C said: I actually wish I was making it up. I can't even bash my bishop without it bleeding 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
PieFacE Posted April 13, 2016 VT Supporter Share Posted April 13, 2016 Yikes Dem, sounds rough!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 15 hours ago, Demitri_C said: I actually wish I was making it up. I can't even bash my bishop without it bleeding If it's bleeding from chaffing skin, have a few days off, and use some moisturiser. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 39 minutes ago, Jon said: If it's bleeding from chaffing skin, have a few days off, and use some moisturiser. Thanks mate will do. I have to admit I was expecting a joke from you about it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rodders0223 Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 Vaseline is your friend. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AndyM3000 Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 Rub some chili on it. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 2 hours ago, AndyM3000 said: Rub some chili on it. that's actually a really bad idea unless the chilli is mixed with sand and glue it will have no benefit whatsoever 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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