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Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread


irreverentad

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1 hour ago, Rugeley Villa said:

bit of advice for anyone whos getting married. dont get too drunk, snort too much coke and end up leaving your wife in a pub and get caught trying to cop off with another woman in a different pub. yes on my wedding day and not something im proud of but i always find a way to **** a good thing up. been a rocky few weeks and i wouldn't blame her if she sent me packing. stupid mistake high on booze and drugs but im sure we will get through it.

 

Mate, are you sure you're not Kenny Powers?

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4 minutes ago, Dr_Pangloss said:

Mate, are you sure you're not Kenny Powers?

Nah, he's the Rugeley Hank Moody, just without the dashing good looks and money ;)

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22 minutes ago, Davkaus said:

Feel free to tell me to mind my own **** business, but have you considered counselling, or joining a support group?

I've seen you comment a few times about knowing you need to know the drink on the head, and as funny as people on here find these stories, it seems like it's dangerously close to **** your life up. It's a hard thing to do, but there's all sorts of places to turn for help. I don't think things ever got quite so colourful for me, but I quit about a year ago and it was the best thing I ever did.

Forgive me for getting all serious!

drink has ruined my life. could give you an endless list why. was speaking to my wife on monday about how my life is so much better without it, why do it then?? i could of lost everything countless of times through drink. ive tried various things including AA but i always end up falling off the wagon. i'll get there in the end :)

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Hang on, wasn't the wedding night of the straighteners UTWU?

This doesn't work chronologically...

 

Get married

Try to get off with other girl

Shove straighteners up missus WU

Be in trouble for point number 2.

Edited by Wainy316
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Ruge has just turned this thread up to 11.

What next? You shoved a cucumber up your anus while shagging a vacuum while your wife urinated in your mouth? Oh wait...

Seriously though mate, I know its amusing to read but you need to sort yourself out. 

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At least you're admitting fault mate, there are plenty of people with drink and drug problems that don't recognise they have issues, so fair play to that.

We only want what's best for you and it looks like drink is a gateway to a pretty dark side of yourself that you don't like. She won't have endless patience and your kids could either grow up resenting you for it or following that same path. I think that's a good enough reason to knock it on the head.

I think you should look at getting into some new activities to take up the time you'd usually be down the pub or at home on the sofa with a few tins. I'm no expert though. Perhaps Davkaus would be kind enough to PM you some of the things he thought helped when he went through something similar?

Edited by Ginko
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im a good dad but id hate my kids to end up like me, because im no role model. ive been doing well lately apart from the last couple of weeks and my wedding day but i just need to keep myself busy so i dont get bored. i'll get there one way or another. just another hurdle in our relationship we have to get over and the missus knows we have to get through it.

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7 hours ago, Ingram85 said:

You need to stop being selfish and do it for your kids mate. You need counselling. Simple as.

Whether you drink because of guilt, shame, the joy of it, you need to recognise the catalyst and change your life style to avoid it. You'll end up on your own, no kids or even dead mate, or you can **** do something about it now and change things before it's too late.

You know your problems, you recognise the need to deal with them, think of your missus, think of your kids and stop **** around saying "I'll get there eventually" and just **** do it now because eventually is always a step ahead and inevitably never comes.

Seriously mate, your stories always get a few likes and I found your shenanigans amusing at first but now it's just sad and I read them waiting to read about your woman leaving and taking the kids. 

Underneath it all mate you are too nice a bloke, too caring a bloke and too good a dad to let this overwhelm you and I'm not hoping to read how you'll sort things out, I'm telling you right now, deal with this before it **** ends you mate.

All the best Ruge, sincerely mate, you can do it.

Rich.

 

 

This is a good post in my opinion. Certainly I think saying things like 'I'll get there eventually' is very much a large part of the problem. 

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9 hours ago, Ingram85 said:

You need to stop being selfish and do it for your kids mate. You need counselling. Simple as.

Whether you drink because of guilt, shame, the joy of it, you need to recognise the catalyst and change your life style to avoid it. You'll end up on your own, no kids or even dead mate, or you can **** do something about it now and change things before it's too late.

You know your problems, you recognise the need to deal with them, think of your missus, think of your kids and stop **** around saying "I'll get there eventually" and just **** do it now because eventually is always a step ahead and inevitably never comes.

Seriously mate, your stories always get a few likes and I found your shenanigans amusing at first but now it's just sad and I read them waiting to read about your woman leaving and taking the kids. 

Underneath it all mate you are too nice a bloke, too caring a bloke and too good a dad to let this overwhelm you and I'm not hoping to read how you'll sort things out, I'm telling you right now, deal with this before it **** ends you mate.

All the best Ruge, sincerely mate, you can do it.

Rich.

 

 

Listen to him, your going to destroy your life mate. You seem like a strong guy, you can turn this around.

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Let's not rush in to all this happy clappy group hug life changing schizz.

I've got a tenner down at Paddy Power that says he won't see out the year.

 

 

 

But seriously, just get a hobby that doesn't destroy you. Travel, or carpentry, cycling, coffee. Anything. We need dicks like you to average out us boring dicks. But be a dick with a cycling compulsion or something. Something where you get to attend your grand children's first wedding or court appearance.

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It sounds like you're surrounded by people who don't really want to help, but want to go for a drink and do some coke etc - you need to chop these people out of your life.

Surround yourself with people who care about you, who want you to stop doing these things and you will lose interest in them - I promise you.

I've never done drugs in my life - because none of my friends have.  If I'd have been surrounded by them and people were telling me how good they are and how I should try them - I would have done them.

There's absolutely no way you'd be doing drugs if you were the only person doing them.

Cut contact with these people who want your money, want you to do drugs/drinking sessions etc and you won't WANT to do them.

As others have said, you're too good a guy.  You care, that much is obvious.  You want to stop.  But that will never happen if you're surrounded by these people who seem like they want you to relapse and fail.

It's all very good reading this on an internet forum, and who knows, for a couple of days it might put you off drink/drugs - but you need continuous support in your life until you have the strength to say "no thanks mate" to these things.

I HOPE you do it, because by the looks of it, you probably won't be able to stop.

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