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Found 87 results

  1. Hello all, As I am not really wanting to Break up with a girl I thought I would start up this thread. I have been seeing this girl for a couple of months. She is funny, beautiful and I really like her. She has an 23 month old son from a previous relationship who is amazing too. Her previous relationship was very violent physically and mentally and ended when her ex husband threatened to burn the house down with her and the baby inside. She lives on high alert and always has a bag packed by the door in case he finds her. No one, apart from immediate family, is allowed to know where she lives (although she has told me). She is hoping that her ex will move back to Sierra Leone in a few weeks (from what she has heard). My issue is quite selfish...... I really like this girl and her son but I am worried that her previous relationship means that I have to be 'whiter than white' and I am always on my guard around people she knows. Her family is very protective (understandably!!!) and as such when I met them last weekend it was kind of like going for an interview. I just want to relax with her but I always feel like I am walking on egg shells around those who know her. I dont want to be held up as the 'saviour of her perceptions of men' and equally I don't want to be judged by her family to this degree. It just seems really early in a relationship with all this heavy stuff. On the flip side she is fantastic. What do I do?
  2. Anybody got an answer to this? My mother in law sent me a text this morning, saying grandparents cannot look after grandchildren for more than 15 hours, or they will get fined... is this for real?
  3. Big Think - This may be a worse case scenario generally, but I actually think some industries job losses will be even more acute. I'm currently working with people developing systems that will put many thousands out of work. So if you think it's shit now, how do you think Tory England (cos let's face it, Scotland's leaving) is going to deal with this? We must surely also add May that is trying to right royally screw up education for the poor, just to hammer in an even bigger wedge between the haves and have nots. The medium and long term picture for the majority is a race for the bottom as far as quality of life is concerned. Sticking two fingers up at this failing society and getting out of it becomes more attractive with every passing year. Especially with independently developed technologies improving all the time. A growing number of my friends are seeking alternatives. A few are proper hippy types in permaculture collectives and such. Another is raising a family in a yurt. This isn't quite as drastic as it sounds. It's a multi yurt, a large central space with smaller connected yurts - Think glamping more than camping. Others have moved to warmer climes and have installed solar power equipment. They grow much of their own food and trade with local farmers for dairy and meat products. They work in the UK over Summer to cover their bills such as N.I contributions. Another friend is making a 'Hobbit House' under a hill - Though I must admit her outside toilet gives me the fear! She should have an inside bog at some point. Her guest house is nearer completion. Visiting folks over Christmas it became obvious even friends earning good money were wanting out. I signed up to a couple of off grid collectives and it surprised me how much has been forgotten. For example it's possible to grow Mediterranean fruit further north in walled enclosures, as they create their own microclimate. Throw in a couple of polytunnels and you're starting to get towards being self sufficient for fruit and veg. Mixing the old and the new seems like the way to go. Septic tanks under the garden that break down effluent into nutrients that slowly pass through the walls of the tank and into your garden. These folks get a quite a bit of power out of a fairly small pipe. Apologies to Darren and the Tree Hugger thread. I'd discussed this with maqroll before, and I don't think you have to be a tree hugger to want something different in today's World.
  4. The Careers/Jobs thread

    VT - I'm stressing, and I really could do with some sound advice from knowledgable people! I'm 25, working in recruitment, but I have hit a bit of a wall. I'm thinking I do not want to be working within this arena anymore. I don't have a degree, which limits me massively as far as I am concerned because every job I see they want someone of 'degree calibre'. I have never known what I wanted to do, I just drifted through school and got myself 10 GCSEs then took a couple of A-levels with the intention of going to uni. I had a place confirmed but then was offered a full time job, which I took. I have absolutely no idea of what to do with my life, I have so much ambition and desire to succeed, but god knows what in. It's stressing me out more now because the missus wants to buy a house etc and I am a little worried about losing my job for whatever reason and then not being able to find anything else. Does anybody have any sound advice to give, or know of any opportunities within the Nhants, oxfordshire or Buckinghamshire areas that might be coming up? Ironic really considering I work in recruitment eh? Thanks all.
  5. Moving to Basel in July and would be good to meet up with some fellow Villa fans, will prob attend a few FC Basel matches too but will definitely head home to watch some Villa games too. Looking also for some local 5 or 7 aside footy to play and of course a decent bar where the footy will be on. Any advice etc please PM me and if keen to meet up then let me know, cheers Steve
  6. Selling a house

    Anybody have any advise or information on selling a house without using an estate agent? Having never bought or sold a house before, I don't really know the ins and outs of what an estate agent does, but say I had a potential buyer already how easy is it to avoid paying estate agent fees?
  7. What is your experience of mental health?

    Following the success of Bedlam on Channel 4, I thought it would be interesting to get people's perspectives on mental health problems, particularly as at any given point 1 in 4 people will experience a mental health problem in their lifetimes. FWIW I have not experienced a mental health problem but I work in the field and find the stigma to be the worst thing, particularly in terms of stopping people looking for support
  8. PCP Question

    Hello Gents, So basically I after months (if not years) of agonising over new/used, brands, models etc. I have just walked into my local dealer and nearly broken him negotiating my new Audi A5 Sportback. My question is...as I spent so long haggling the base price, extras etc. I fell into the bloody trap of the crappy insurances they push on you at the very end...I consider myself to be fairly savvy with a good dose of cynicism about salesmen but for some reason I fell for £699 Gap Cover and £399 Alloy wheel cover....DONT ASK ME WHY. I almost felt sorry for him as i'd gotten a deal even better than carwow (car broker site) until then. The paperwork won't be arriving until later on but I have paid the initial £1k deposit. Can I pull out of these insurances now or will they make life hard for me? I've found the same 2 insurances for £210 combined and feel like a total lemon. I'm sure the salesman will be annoyed which I don't care about but can they go back on the 9% discount they've given me in addition to the 'Audi Deposit Contribution'? Thanks.
  9. Viewing / Buying a house

    Hello all! Off to view a house tonight, (scary stuff!), and as its the first one I've liked enough from a quick peruse of Rightmove to go and see its my first proper house viewing. I wondered if any of my fellow VT'ers have any advice on the house viewing / buying process? Cheers!
  10. Snow Watch!

    Morning, snow fans! Well it looks like the first white stuff of the year is coming. Is that good or bad? I was going to drive to Brum from London today but bugger that, not with what I'm watching get closer here
  11. Tablet buying advice, please

    OK. I'm thinking of buying the missus a 10" for Christmas... Tablet, that is. After the recent fiasco we had with a failed Win 10 installation that buggered our main 'living room' laptop, we've been using my music production laptop instead, and I want it back in the mancave. I was thinking that a 10" tablet would probably be a better idea than another laptop. Main uses would be web browsing, email, social media.. But also the very occasional bit of word processing (writing letters, etc.) I was thinking of going Android as we both have Android phones, but I'm wondering about compatibility with our older files (MS Office stuff mainly). Max budget £400, but preferably cheaper! First thoughts were a Galaxy Tab S or a Google Nexus 10. Thoughts, guys?
  12. The Tradesman's Entrance

    That's got your attention, you filthy devil! I was going to start a thread asking for some help with double glazing, as my parents need a full set of new windows installing at their house in Kidderminster so thought I'd check on VT and see if anyone was in that line of work. Then, I figured I can't be the only one who would like to keep local Villa-supported firms in business so decided this could be VT's answer to Checkatrade. So, first request - any double glazing pros here on VT that want some business in the next few weeks?
  13. Pranks & Vengeance

    image hosting no sign up You do realise dont you, that what unfolded in the Jack Grealish thread recently was just a mini-prank... dihydrogen monoxide (and hydroxic acid) is literally water. Nobody got sucked into that one did they ? That scored a 0.001/10 on the prank-o-meter. That dihydrogen monoxide crap, I fully unleashed on my workplace and had people literally in sheer panic about the "hydroxic acid spillage in the kitchen by the sink", the sign on the toilets about the "dihydrogen monoxide leak" all sorts. Nobody even googled it, just panicked. These people are so gullible, i need more, and better! Let's form a repository for sharing best practice when it comes to all things prankage and vengeance. I want to hear your "greatest hits" of sweet payback or unprompted wind-ups, and not just the "best ones" but the ones that meant the most to you, and why... from the home, the workplace, the pub, the ground, school, college, uni anywhere...
  14. The VT writers cove...

    Any writers here? We've got a readers digest thread, but I wondered if we have any writers here? I have four books on the go, with another 3,200 in my head. Ouch. Currently working on a book for kids, one for teens and one that would interest adults.. I better not get bits mixed up, I'm not sure Tommy, aged 5, will want to read about a young girl who sets up her teacher, kills him, then goes missing. So, writers, throw those pens in the air... .NOW!
  15. Mistakenly priced items

    How does the law stand on items advertised for sale with a price which is clearly a mistake? I just saw this online - the actual price is over a thousand quid - clearly somebody's put the decimal point in the wrong place. If I just order it for £1.01 are they obliged to honour the deal?
  16. Everyone, everywhere, is either full on weird, or, they have a little weird routine, or their own little weird life hack. Let's examine the latter two, if anyone else has any to share. Right, so in another thread I just mentioned something so I'll say it here, yes it's weird but I stand by it. VT'ers this is a little confessional. Ahem. Right. Here goes. Oh boy.... Ahem I do a lot of walking, am on my feet a lot, and generally am well exercised. This causes me to get really hard skin on my heels and side of feet that is so rough I only have to take off a sock and it sounds like someone ripping a newspaper in half. My confessional weird life hack is, when needed, maybe once a month, I'll get my black and decker detail sander, stick on an 80 grit or a 120 and sand my feet! It's safe, effective and rapid. F----- feels good too. the shame, the shame!
  17. Life Insurance

    Right then, I've recently started thinking about getting some life insurance so i can leave a bit of money to my loved ones should the worst happen. I've had a little look online today and it seems like a bit of minefield. Increasing policies, decreasing policies, do i want to be covered for 20yrs/30yrs etc (am i supposed to try and predict when i am going snuff it?) I filled out my details on a comparison site thinking I'd get some online information/quotes, instead, I'm just getting bombarded with calls and texts from sales reps. I'm not looking for anything complicated, I just want to pay x amount every month so the kids get a little something when i drop dead. Can anyone offer any advice and/or recommendations? Thanks.
  18. Parking Ticket

    Super people on VillaTalk! I need your help. Today, I got home to a parking fine of £100. I'm pissed off, to say the least. Apparently, you're not able to park at the Merry Hill Ultimate Outdoors car park for more than 2 hours. This is new to me, as I have been parking at Merry Hill, including the car park at the Ultimate Outdoors part for free for years. Can I appeal this, on some grounds? The letter is from Parking Eye Limited, who privately own the land. I stayed there for 2 hours 20 minutes. 20 minutes over the allowed time. The letter says that the signage is clearly displayed at the entrance and throughout the car park. I'm planning to go back tomorrow and see how clear the signage is. Personally, I hadn't noticed any signs, but maybe I just didn't look? The letter also has photos of my car entering and leaving the car park, as well as the usual stuff about the fine being reduced to £60 if I pay in 14 days of being issued, which is 19/08. Annoyingly, it says it was issued on 05/08, but it's only landed in my postbox today, 6 days later. Are there some sort of grounds I can base on, that these must be fairly new restrictions, and the signs should boldly inform you of 'new parking restrictions' ? Or am I reaching here?
  19. Gardening

    Calm down Morpheus, not that kind of gardening. Don't think there's a thread on here for gardening, so I'm starting one! Somewhere to throw ideas around, ask for advice, show off etc I'm not a keen gardener, but I need to take some interest as I have a large garden with potential, but it is currently useless as I don't do anything with it bar mowing the grass. So here's the advice I'm after. Half of my garden is grass, which is fine. I mow it. The other half (the bottom half) is overgrown at the moment with weeds, briars, long grass etc. What's the best plan of attack for this? My thoughts were to borrow a strimmer and get it all cut down, and then hire a rotavator and dig up the ground, then replant the grass (just basic grass seed) Will that work or will the weeds come back with the grass? Could go for turf but it's more expensive and I'm in no hurry so can afford to wait for the seed to grow. (I realise this is a really boring thread, but I need advice so worth a try! )
  20. Formula help

    My brother's just become a manager and wants his staff to start taking it in turns using this tablet thing as a till on a Saturday for a 5 hour period. So one member of staff uses it each week. The staff hate using it because it means they actually have to do their job better and walk around rather than standing behind the counter, so he's trying to find a formula to reward who does the most work. He says that the amount of people that you serve is more important than the total number of items you sell, but also says that selling more items obviously means you're still working. So selling 10 items to 1 person is harder work than selling 1 item each to 2 people. Then also because each person is working a different Saturday, someone serving 10 out of 20 people is better than serving 20 out of 100. Any idea on a formula he can use to try and work this stuff out? and then what would the final number at the end of said formula actually represent so he can explain it to his employees. Cheers
  21. Money - Making it and saving it

    Hello friends, Couldn't see a money thread so thought I'd start one, apologies if one already exists (and Mods definitely not spamming any EZ-Money type thing I promise) Was talking stocks and shares with a buddy the other day, I've had some decent returns in the past through employee sharesave schemes, but since moved into a different line of work that can't offer such benefits. Was wondering if anyone invested privately and how they make their decisions? Also, how much do you reckon you spend a week at work? How do you feel about it? Safe x
  22. Continental Shift Patterns

    I have been offered a job that involves continental shifts, 4 12 hour days, 4 days off followed by 4 12 hour nights. Does anybody do these continental shifts? and if so what are positives/negatives? I've always declined any job offers that include shifts and only ever worked days. On the upside it is 11k a year more than what i am on at the minute and its an exciting opportunity. please give me some positives!!!
  23. Second hand car advice

    First of all I'm not sure if this is ok as a new topic or should be in the consumer advice section in the Tech thread. If it's wrong I'm sorry. Anyway about 2 months ago I traded my car in for a 2nd hand one with a local car salesman - not a private sale. I did the usual checks, took it for a drive and everything seemed good so I completed the sale. It had been MOT'd the day of the sale, couple of advisory notes but nothing serious. After 2 months I've had to call Green Flag out twice, once after losing all acceleration in the outside line on a motorway - scary when it happened. The guy who towed me checked it over and said it was possible damp in the ECU (a known problem on audi a4's apparently). Also shortly after having it I'd noticed almost a rubbing sound when turning left so I took it to a garage yesterday for them to look at. What they found was quite worrying - subframe issues, gearbox and engine mount problems, which I was advised make the car dangerous to drive and it shouldn't have passed the MOT. I called the guy who sold me the car and he said he's used his preferred garage for ages and they are really good, and to take it to them to look at. Even though they were open yesterday they said it wad just for paperwork. It was only afterwards I thought there were guys in overalls there so this was probably bull. I've got to take it back there Tuesday, well my gf has as I've got a meeting I can't miss on Tuesday at work. I'm expecting them to say it's fine, even though I have seen its not. The garage I use said the subframe would cost around £600 alone to replace brand new but to look on eBay for second hand as it'd be considerably cheaper. I haven't got a clue what I'm looking for though! I don't know if I'm covered by any consumer laws. If id purchased from a private sale I know it's sold as seen but is this the case for a dealer?
  24. Double Glazing

    Anyone had double glazing fitted recently and know rough cost? I need a few windows replacing and wondered what fair prices were...?
  25. Privately Letting Your House

    If anyone takes any notice of my Off Topic ramblings, you may be aware I'm prepping to sell or let my house. I've now had someone I know approach me looking for a house to rent. They should be good tennants and are looking to pay the sort of rent I'd be looking for. Has anyone got experience of letting their house privately, i.e. avoiding estate agents? Am I letting myself in for a nightmare or is it a prudent way to go in avoiding letting fees etc? I'm particularly interested in the legalities of it. Like how do I enforce a 12 month tenancy if I'm doing it privately?