Xela Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 Apply some salt to the open wound for maximum benefit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 13, 2016 Share Posted April 13, 2016 2 hours ago, AndyM3000 said: Rub some chili on it. That's @PieFacE remit mate :-p 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
troon_villan Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 Try anal with a first timer. That'll clear it up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shaw_nuff Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 (edited) On 12/04/2016 at 21:12, Demitri_C said: I actually wish I was making it up. I can't even bash my bishop without it bleeding I all seriousness (for once) it could be the early stages of this: http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/phimosis/Pages/Introduction.aspx Phimosis is a condition where the foreskin is too tight to be pulled back over the head of the penis (glans). Phimosis is normal in babies and toddlers, but in older children it may be the result of a skin condition that has caused scarring. It isn't usually a problem unless it causes symptoms. Immediate treatment is needed in cases where phimosis causes problems such as difficulty urinating. So get it checked out!!! I had it and left it too long and had to have an adult circumcision (which is no fun). All because of my gargantuan bell end of course. Edited April 14, 2016 by Shaw_nuff Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 1 hour ago, Shaw_nuff said: I all seriousness (for once) it could be the early stages of this: http://www.nhs.uk/conditions/phimosis/Pages/Introduction.aspx Phimosis is a condition where the foreskin is too tight to be pulled back over the head of the penis (glans). Phimosis is normal in babies and toddlers, but in older children it may be the result of a skin condition that has caused scarring. It isn't usually a problem unless it causes symptoms. Immediate treatment is needed in cases where phimosis causes problems such as difficulty urinating. So get it checked out!!! I had it and left it too long and had to have an adult circumcision (which is no fun). All because of my gargantuan bell end of course. Thanks for that, thankfully i don't think its that because when I pull my foreskin back I have never had pain in the past. I think its because it was done "aggressively" I am just avoiding doing any activity for a week then I will see if it still bleeds. If it does then I might have to go GP Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 4 minutes ago, Demitri_C said: Thanks for that, thankfully i don't think its that because when I pull my foreskin back I have never had pain in the past. I think its because it was done "aggressively" I am just avoiding doing any activity for a week then I will see if it still bleeds. If it does then I might have to go GP I've had it before Demmers. Overly aggressive 'shuffling' plus maybe slightly dry skin = chaffing = ouchville. Rest + maybe moisturiser should do the trick. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 3 minutes ago, Jon said: I've had it before Demmers. Overly aggressive 'shuffling' plus maybe slightly dry skin = chaffing = ouchville. Rest + maybe moisturiser should do the trick. Thanks Jon put my mind at ease abit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 On 12/04/2016 at 13:41, Demitri_C said: Ok an embarassing one now.. has anyone had a woman play with their "soldier" too hard/violently before? I've never been with a woman who had a "soldier". 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
V01 Posted April 14, 2016 Share Posted April 14, 2016 45 minutes ago, Genie said: I've never been with a woman. FTFY 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
samjp26 Posted April 15, 2016 Share Posted April 15, 2016 19 hours ago, Demitri_C said: Thanks for that, thankfully i don't think its that because when I pull my foreskin back I have never had pain in the past. I think its because it was done "aggressively" I am just avoiding doing any activity for a week then I will see if it still bleeds. If it does then I might have to go GP Your skin can actually "tighten" over time, causing Phimosis - can be pretty dangerous too. In all honesty, go and get yourself circumcised. P.s. Off to the hospital, the twins are arriving! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
YLN Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 What in the world is going on in here? Sounds like banjo string. Can't think of anything else that would make a penis bleed from over zealous pumping. Don't let her near it again, and leave it alone yourself for a while, unless you can toss yourself off without pulling back much on the foreskin. Otherwise give it a holiday. Read a book, knit a scarf and give it a few weeks, and then be gentle. And if eventual sex, use lots of lube. Phimosis.... 'ckin hell Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Ingram85 Posted April 16, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted April 16, 2016 (edited) I don't want to be married anymore. I got properly told off last night because I put the wooden bread board in the dishwasher by accident. Cries of "It will deform"! and "are you a **** idiot"? **** off love. It's a bread board. Wives ruin lives. Edited April 16, 2016 by Ingram85 13 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dAVe80 Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 22 minutes ago, Ingram85 said: I don't want to be married anymore. I got properly told off last night because I put the wooden bread board in the dishwasher by accident. Cries of "It will deform"! and "are you a **** idiot"? **** off love. It's a bread board. Wives ruin lives. Only thing to do is go on an all day bender, and bring home two Thai prostitutes and a bag of coke. If you're in trouble anyway, might as well be hung for a sheep, as a lamb. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post YLN Posted April 16, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted April 16, 2016 8 hours ago, Ingram85 said: I don't want to be married anymore. I got properly told off last night because I put the wooden bread board in the dishwasher by accident. Cries of "It will deform"! and "are you a **** idiot"? **** off love. It's a bread board. Wives ruin lives. I don't have a wife or a bread board, so I'm feeling pretty smug right about now. 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HanoiVillan Posted April 16, 2016 Share Posted April 16, 2016 11 hours ago, Ingram85 said: I don't want to be married anymore. I got properly told off last night because I put the wooden bread board in the dishwasher by accident. Cries of "It will deform"! and "are you a **** idiot"? **** off love. It's a bread board. Wives ruin lives. How do you put a bread board into a dishwasher 'by accident'? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 17, 2016 Share Posted April 17, 2016 (edited) I don't even know what a bread board is so I would probably have done the same thing! Edited April 17, 2016 by Demitri_C Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post chrisp65 Posted April 17, 2016 Popular Post Share Posted April 17, 2016 I can't believe someone would get married AND buy a dishwasher. You've paid twice for the same thing there.... 11 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted April 17, 2016 Share Posted April 17, 2016 20 hours ago, dAVe80 said: Only thing to do is go on an all day bender, and bring home two Thai prostitutes and a bag of coke. If you're in trouble anyway, might as well be hung for a sheep, as a lamb. Minus the Thai prostitutes I've done that so many times once you've snorted that last line it's like well I had better ring her up now and plead that I'm a changed man and I won't do it again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Albrighton Posted April 17, 2016 VT Supporter Share Posted April 17, 2016 (edited) 2 hours ago, Demitri_C said: I don't even know what a bread board is so I would probably have done the same thing! So when you're cutting/buttering your bread, what surface are you working on? A plate? edit-that question belongs in the boring thread, apologies. Edited April 17, 2016 by Shropshire Lad Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted April 17, 2016 Share Posted April 17, 2016 29 minutes ago, Shropshire Lad said: So when you're cutting/buttering your bread, what surface are you working on? A plate? edit-that question belongs in the boring thread, apologies. I dont eat bread!! That probably explains it ;-) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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