Genie Posted November 23, 2022 Share Posted November 23, 2022 6 minutes ago, Anthony said: That's awful. I love it. It’s just awful. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted November 23, 2022 Share Posted November 23, 2022 25 minutes ago, Anthony said: That's awful. I love it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted November 23, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted November 23, 2022 41 minutes ago, mjmooney said: I met a Dalek in the pub who claimed he was from Devon so I asked him “Whereabouts in Devon are you from mate ?” He replied “EXETER MATE! EXETER MATE!” A Dalek in a pub? I bet it was completely legless. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted November 23, 2022 Moderator Share Posted November 23, 2022 10 minutes ago, sidcow said: A Dalek in a pub? I bet it was completely legless. Never stair at a Dalek. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 (edited) You may find this funny, or you may have sympathy a true story the things that only happen to me or do they Thursday night I went off to my night shift 10.30pm start, when I arrived at work, I realised I had forgotten my phone. No sweat I had my work phone. Sometime during the night, I lent one of the lads my keys to open the PPE locker my car keys and locker keys are also on this set. 7am at end of my shift I started doing my paperwork for morning report productivity, scrap etc. Then around 7.30 I realised that the lad who borrowed my keys had gone home with them. So, I have to go to security, borrow spare locker key to get changed, I have to phone Mrs T to get up and bring my spare car keys to work (only 15 mins away) so I can get home. BUT I don't have my phone and I realised I don't know her phone number. I have to wait until 08.30 for HR to come in and look up my next of kin to get her number. I borrow someone else's phone and ring her several times, but she doesn't answer because she doesn't recognise the number. Then I text her and we eventually get to talk, and she brings keys, I get home just after 9am. FFS what a morning. But could this happen to you. Do you know your wife's phone number or is it just saved to your phone too? Edited November 26, 2022 by Robtaylor200 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 (edited) My mate said he got home the other night and found his dog on the lawn all dirty and muddy, playing with a dead rabbit. He said the only rabbits he knows are the neighbours who bread show rabbits. He decided to wash it clean, dry it and put it back in one of their empty cages hoping they wouldn’t notice straight away. When they came home from work later he heard her screaming. What's the matter he asked with a concerned voice. She said its my rabbit my favourite rabbit. It died a couple of days ago and I buried it in the garden and now its back in its cage Edited November 26, 2022 by Robtaylor200 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blandy Posted November 26, 2022 Moderator Share Posted November 26, 2022 On 14/11/2022 at 20:40, Genie said: I’d have thought that a pallet of Nestle chocolate in a Cadbury factory would be a surprise in itself. Cause for Celebrations, or maybe Roses for the funeral. It means a lot. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Rds1983 Posted November 26, 2022 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted November 26, 2022 2 hours ago, Robtaylor200 said: You may find this funny, or you may have sympathy a true story the things that only happen to me or do they Thursday night I went off to my night shift 10.30pm start, when I arrived at work, I realised I had forgotten my phone. No sweat I had my work phone. Sometime during the night, I lent one of the lads my keys to open the PPE locker my car keys and locker keys are also on this set. 7am at end of my shift I started doing my paperwork for morning report productivity, scrap etc. Then around 7.30 I realised that the lad who borrowed my keys had gone home with them. So, I have to go to security, borrow spare locker key to get changed, I have to phone Mrs T to get up and bring my spare car keys to work (only 15 mins away) so I can get home. BUT I don't have my phone and I realised I don't know her phone number. I have to wait until 08.30 for HR to come in and look up my next of kin to get her number. I borrow someone else's phone and ring her several times, but she doesn't answer because she doesn't recognise the number. Then I text her and we eventually get to talk, and she brings keys, I get home just after 9am. FFS what a morning. But could this happen to you. Do you know your wife's phone number or is it just saved to your phone too? Nah, I'd be fine. I've memorised your wife's number. 1 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted December 7, 2022 Share Posted December 7, 2022 Jokes any one ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted December 7, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 7, 2022 (edited) 2 hours ago, Robtaylor200 said: Jokes any one ? You'll struggle to find any on this thread for sure. Edited December 7, 2022 by sidcow 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Albrighton Posted December 11, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 11, 2022 2 minutes ago, KentVillan said: Anyone else noticing replies are getting displayed in the wrong order now? Really looks like the predicted cascade of bugs is starting to kick in - I guess as traffic has surged around the World Cup, and no doubt will get heavier over Christmas as more and more people in the US and Northern Europe are stuck indoors. Should be entertaining. Elon Musk is a reprehensible man, isn’t he. Just a completely juvenile worldview. Would love it if he found himself in a devastating financial hole after this… although got a feeling he’ll get bailed out by Saudis / Chinese No, I can’t say I have noticed 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KentVillan Posted December 11, 2022 Share Posted December 11, 2022 2 minutes ago, Mark Albrighton said: No, I can’t say I have noticed @sidcowwas right Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted December 11, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 11, 2022 17 minutes ago, KentVillan said: @sidcowwas right Eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mark Albrighton Posted December 11, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 11, 2022 7 minutes ago, sidcow said: Eh? Bit of cross thread japes from me. Ignore. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sidcow Posted December 11, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 11, 2022 1 minute ago, Mark Albrighton said: Bit of cross thread japes from me. Ignore. Eh? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post colhint Posted December 14, 2022 Popular Post Share Posted December 14, 2022 I met a fairy in the woods, she had fallen and was stuck under a rock. So I lifted the rock and released her. She composed herself and said thank you kind sir, I will grant you one wish. I thought about it and said I would like to live forever. She said alas kind sir I cannot do that. So I said I would like to see England win the world cup. She said you crafty bugger. 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post BOF Posted December 15, 2022 Moderator Popular Post Share Posted December 15, 2022 15 hours ago, colhint said: I met a fairy in the woods, she had fallen and was stuck under a rock. Yeah I've seen those videos. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted December 18, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 18, 2022 What did Robocop say to Schrodinger's cat? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mjmooney Posted December 19, 2022 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted December 19, 2022 Little known fact: Before the crowbar was invented crows simply drank at home. 2 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choffer Posted December 20, 2022 VT Supporter Share Posted December 20, 2022 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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