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Surely the 1 year rolling contract was a sign.

Was it even a rolling contract? I know he was contracted only until the end of this season, which was a clear indicator to me Abramovich was going to shitcan him when Pep's sabbatical finished.

I guess the timing is to do with RA thinking action is needed now to have any chance of CL progression this year and he is also concerned about qualifying for next year.

I'd piss myself if it is Benitez who comes in. Come on down Rafa, lead them out of Europe and march them down the league, you know you can do it!

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How long before Ray Wilkins is on SSN

"Robbie will be gutted, but Robbie will be back in the premier league as a top manager before long. He's a smashing fellow is Robbie. John will stabilise the group while the football club make a decision, John and Frank and Ashley will hold the group together. And Petr.

Stay on your feet"

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Was it even a rolling contract? I know he was contracted only until the end of this season, which was a clear indicator to me Abramovich was going to shitcan him when Pep's sabbatical finished.

He signed a 2 year contract in June
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The only way I can see them appointing Benitez is if they think he'll get the best out of Torres. I can't believe any owner would appoint a manager just so he can get the best out of one player. Actually let me rephrase, I can't believe any owner except Abramovich would appoint a manager just so he can the best out of one player.

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The Fiver gives its own inimitable twist

Chelsea and Punxsutawney Phil

Groundhog-Day-Punxsutawne-007.jpg

Punxsutawney Phil prepares to relay news of Chelsea's latest managerial swap shop. Photograph: Jason Cohn/Reuters

LIKE A MONKEY WITH A MINIATURE CYMBAL

Late last night, Chelsea sacked Roberto Di Matteo. They didn't bother putting up a statement on their internet site. Instead, they relayed the news using an animated gif picturing Punxsutawney Phil scuttling out of his hole and running up a flight of stairs drawn by MC Escher and then along some horizontal stairs and then down some stairs and then back along some horizontal stairs while reading aloud the entire text of Finnegans Wake from "riverrun past Eve and Adam's" to "a way a lone a last a loved a long the" and then scuttling back into his hole and then scuttling out of his hole and running up a flight of stairs drawn by MC Escher and then along some horizontal stairs and then down some stairs and then back along some horizontal stairs while reading aloud the entire text of Finnegans Wake from "riverrun past Eve and Adam's" to "a way a lone a last a loved a long the" and then scuttling back into his hole and then scuttling out of his hole.

Anyway, it all happened very early in the morning (or very late in the evening, depending on how developed your problem-drinking is). This explains a lot. Chelsea chief executive Ron Gourlay and chairman Bruce Buck had been under explicit orders from Roman Abramovich to "sack the manager" after the team were spanked 3-0, or 10-0 in moral terms, by Juventus in Big Cup, a result which leaves the holders unlikely to be holding on for very much longer. But Gourlay and Buck were feeling snoozy, and still had some sleepy dust in their eyes, and instead of firing Plain Old John Terry, the yawning pair accidentally handed the P45 to club mascot Di Matteo instead. The farce was further compounded with news that the security guard required to frogmarch Di Matteo off the premises is, because of the early hour of the dismissal, technically due to be paid double time, but wants to take a day off in lieu next week instead, and Chelsea are thinking about sacking someone else then. They'll probably have to nip down the agency to get a temp to cover for him.

That's not the only knock-on effect of Abramovich's diktat, though. Chelsea are now looking for a new mascot to satisfy Abramovich and POJT, and reports suggest former Extremadura supremo Rafa Benitez is the chappie they're going to get. In many ways, that'd be a strange choice. That's partly because the fans don't want him: two La Liga titles and a Big Cup is all good and well, but he's not yet proved he can throw a lasso around the moon, yank it down to ground, and convert it to diamonds, coins and marshmallow yum-yums, so fair play to them for standing their ground over that one. But it's mainly because the impressively belligerent Benitez – who has expressed interest in the role – isn't exactly the type to sit down, shut up, and smile nicely like a good boy while doing his boss's bidding.

So if this deal does go through, sit back and wait for the kind of firework display over the Stamford Bridge boardroom that will make the immediate reaction to this appointment on Liverpool messageboards look like a damp squib. The first Catherine wheel will be lit in roughly 100 days' time, 200 tops. By which time the Chelsea website editor will be dusting off that animated gif, with a view to coaxing Punxsutawney Phil out of his hole and sending him up a flight of stairs drawn by MC Escher and then along some horizontal stairs and then down some stairs and then back along some horizontal stairs while reading aloud the entire text of Finnegans Wake from "riverrun past Eve and Adam's" to "a way a lone a last a loved a long the" and then scuttling back into his hole and then scuttling out of his hole.

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They never wanted him long term in the first place, he was clearly only meant to be there until the end of last season when they could replace him wih a 'big name'. Just would have been a PR disaster to sack the man who had just waltzed in and won the Champions League and FA Cup.

Not that this is much better.

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