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Irreverentad's Relationship Advice Thread


irreverentad

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31 minutes ago, Rugeley Villa said:

Not in a ghey way, but for example I've always had a thing for Micheal Hutchence. 

How could you tell it was him with the bag over his head and the orange shoved in his mouth? 

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20 minutes ago, chrisp65 said:

I'm no expert here, on account of being the most boringly vanilla guy in the room.

But I think having a little bit of a thing for any small number of blokes for a small proportion of time under some limited circumstances, that probably makes you a bit bi.

Which is fine. In the brief flickering spark of our nano second of existence here on earth, you'll be considered quite cool and modern.

Eventually however, you'll die and then spend the rest of eternity burning in hell with a red hot rusty poker up your arse, and Harris Milstead sticking his tongue in your ear. But well, we can worry about that tomorrow.

Probably a first here on VT regarding this subject. I don't consider myself bi at all, although my wife thinks I've had bi tendencies in the past. I've had the opportunity several times in the past to go home with men and even once a transsexual. I politely declined  where some people I know would probably give them a good hiding. I've openly flirted with gay men before just for the sake of it and just for a bit of fun. I won't lie, but at times I've enjoyed some of the attention I've had of one or two men in the past. It all sounds a bit ghey and probably will surprise a few people, but yeah I've always considered it a bit of fun in terms of flirting. I've never done anything with a bloke and never would. Why? Because I'm honestly straight. I've had one or two crushes in past whilst growing up, and it's weird to admit that. Anyway :)

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There is a bloke in my office who has to be the most beautiful man I've even seen. He's got everything - dark, mediterranean looks, body like an adonis and big brown eyes that you could just drown in (ok...this is getting a bit ghey now !). All the women go all giggly and coy around him and have their tongues and eyes out when he walks past. I wish I could hate him but he's a really sound bloke and very grounded.

I dont wanna do him..... i just wanna BE him for about a month and what a month that would be :D

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8 minutes ago, mottaloo said:

There is a bloke in my office who has to be the most beautiful man I've even seen. He's got everything - dark, mediterranean looks, body like an adonis and big brown eyes that you could just drown in (ok...this is getting a bit ghey now !). All the women go all giggly and coy around him and have their tongues and eyes out when he walks past. I wish I could hate him but he's a really sound bloke and very grounded.

I dont wanna do him..... i just wanna BE him for about a month and what a month that would be :D

I can recognise a good looking bloke when I see one,  and I can understand why some men get loads of women. But it's not about being good looking or looking like the bloke you describe. Now and again and it's very rare that I think bloody hell hes nice. Like I've said I had a massive crush on Micheal Hutchence growing up and I still do now if I'm honest. 

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6 hours ago, Rugeley Villa said:

I can recognise a good looking bloke when I see one,  and I can understand why some men get loads of women. But it's not about being good looking or looking like the bloke you describe. Now and again and it's very rare that I think bloody hell hes nice. Like I've said I had a massive crush on Micheal Hutchence growing up and I still do now if I'm honest. 

So we can add necrophilia to the list...excellent! 

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7 hours ago, Rugeley Villa said:

Probably a first here on VT regarding this subject. I don't consider myself bi at all, although my wife thinks I've had bi tendencies in the past. I've had the opportunity several times in the past to go home with men and even once a transsexual. I politely declined  where some people I know would probably give them a good hiding. I've openly flirted with gay men before just for the sake of it and just for a bit of fun. I won't lie, but at times I've enjoyed some of the attention I've had of one or two men in the past. It all sounds a bit ghey and probably will surprise a few people, but yeah I've always considered it a bit of fun in terms of flirting. I've never done anything with a bloke and never would. Why? Because I'm honestly straight. I've had one or two crushes in past whilst growing up, and it's weird to admit that. Anyway :)

A 3some with the missus and your bloke, probably doesn't count :D

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3 minutes ago, Stevo985 said:

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Are you sure, you seem upset?"

"honestly, I'm fine"

"ok"

 

 

*12 hours later*

 

"I was really upset last night!"

"FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

Haha, been there so many times. Now I've learned when she's "in one" not to ask until she tells me she's in a mood.

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11 minutes ago, Genie said:

Haha, been there so many times. Now I've learned when she's "in one" not to ask until she tells me she's in a mood.

Then you're to blame for not noticing, you callous bastard. 

There is no way you can win. 

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19 minutes ago, Stevo985 said:

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing"

"Are you sure, you seem upset?"

"honestly, I'm fine"

"ok"

 

 

*12 hours later*

 

"I was really upset last night!"

"FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU-"

You wouldn't get that with the bloke from work ;)

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My current favourite is

" did you remember to get x, y, z?"

"you don't need to remind me all the time! I know what we need!"

"did you?"

"no. can you pick some up from the shops on your way home?"

--

next time, change tack:

" hmm, bun, we don't have any more x, y, z!"

" well you should have told me before I went shopping!"

 

:rant:

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5 minutes ago, StefanAVFC said:

"When you pick me up from work, can you bring my clothes for football?"

"okay"

*Picks me up without clothes*

"WHY DIDN'T YOU REMIND ME????"

I've mentioned this before, but it's all in Samuel Pepys' Diary (from the 1660s!) 

He does loads of exasperated rants about his missus - including a version of the one above, where they came back from a night out and she left her gloves in the carriage. She blamed him, because he didn't remind her to pick them up. His reaction of "HOW THE HELL IS THIS MY FAULT???" positively screams off the page. 

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27 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

I've mentioned this before, but it's all in Samuel Pepys' Diary (from the 1660s!) 

He does loads of exasperated rants about his missus - including a version of the one above, where they came back from a night out and she left her gloves in the carriage. She blamed him, because he didn't remind her to pick them up. His reaction of "HOW THE HELL IS THIS MY FAULT???" positively screams off the page. 

I saw the best example of this on the weekend. At my OH's sister's wedding. 

We got an old London bus to and from the church. Nice idea. Impracticall when prosecco is served but whatever.

Anyway, we were opposite the mother and father of the groom. Nice enough people, but the wife is basically waited on hand and foot. She walks all over the husband. He does everything for her.

She's holding her prosecco glass, and we go round a bend and she spills most of it down the leg of her husband. Accidents happen.
But she immediately exclaimed "Oh Peter, that's your fault that is!"

He just kind of shrugged, but my face must have been a picture. I don't know how her mind must work if she thinks that was anyone's fault but hers :D 

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"Oh by the way, we're going to a wedding on Saturday"

"Err, we are?"

"Yeah, you agreed to it, it's my friend Steph. I spent some time in France with her"

"Did I? Who? When?"

"Yeah, you agreed ages ago. You've met Steph in Lille (10 years ago!)."

"Right, who's going who we might know?"

"Well, nobody just Steph"

Fuuuuuuuuurk that! 

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Anybody's partner a twin? Talk about petty fallings out, and I'm always getting dragged in to it. So competitive as well, in regards to everything. Literally. Holidays, cars, home, even bloody pets! Neither of them would admit it, ever, but they're always like it and always will be I'm sure.

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