Lapal Fan's Obnoxious Odours. A Topic

[lapal_fan]

Just now, blandy said:

Ah, so that's where the family mongrel, "ODB"  (Old Doggie B*stard, in full ) went, when he "went to live on a farm". I did wonder why Mr Hopkirk had a bloodied spade, and a fresh mound of dirt in the garden, but I can rest easy, now. Nothing sinister happened.

I think we can all agree Blandy, that bollocks have indeed.. been dropped. 

But I get back up again, because you'll never keep me down. 

[Xela]

5 hours ago, Kingman said:

Cat shit after a session on the tuna or a wet donkeys fart! 

Why is the donkey wet? Is it raining?

[TheAuthority]

15 hours ago, sharkyvilla said:

My mate Skidmark Greg tricked me into sniffing a tooth he'd had removed and kept in a jar for a few days, crikey that's the closest I've got to vomiting on the spot out of pure disgust.  Still gag just thinking about it.

You have a mate called Skidmark Greg? 

[Xann]

Asafoetida is fairly minging.

We're entering that time of year when you play the which cheese is stinking out the kitchen? game.

[ThunderPower_14]

I'm a police officer and i've been to a few fairly decomposed dead bodies, but the one thing that stands out to me is rotting onions from my days working at a fruit and veg wholesaler. I have a strong stomach but I just couldn't get near it without dry retching.

[Phumfeinz]

The worst thing I've ever smelt was a dead rabbit on the motorway in the pouring rain so it was all nice and soggy. I rode over it on my motorbike and the smell just flew up into my helmet and hit me like a punch in the face. And yeah I had nice mushed up grey and pink bits all over the bottom of my bike and boots.

[Demitri_C]

Chicken when it goes off. I forgot I had chicken in the boot and after 3-4 days the car was reeking. I wanted to vomit 

Edited November 23, 2017 by Demitri_C

[AJ]

When I was in training, I had to change an old lady's ileostomy bag.

Basically it is poo, but it hasn't been through the full process, so it has the poo smell but smells more acrid, and more acidic.

I changed it no worries, because I was " in my zone", but later during my coffee break I was thinking eeww, that was icky.

[hogso]

B . O .

[mjmooney]

On 21/11/2017 at 12:52, blandy said:

Wow. I cannot stand the smell of MacDonalds. Every time I go past one I want to gag

Nothing compared to Subway. The smell alone has prevented me ever entering their premises. 

Actually, this thread is old enough to smell a bit mouldy. 

[sidcow]

On 20/11/2017 at 15:43, lapal_fan said:

I'll go first;

Poo

Is there anything you don't like smelling a lot? 

Put that down in here, it will be a good thread I feel it in my bones. 

My poo smells like insence 

[AshVilla]

Smegma

[sidcow]

Toe cheese 

[rjw63]

14 minutes ago, mjmooney said:

 

Actually, this thread is old enough to smell a bit mouldy. 

[blandy]

11 hours ago, mjmooney said:

Nothing compared to Subway. The smell alone has prevented me ever entering their premises. 

Actually, this thread is old enough to smell a bit mouldy. 

Wow! Somebody…actually not just anybody, but a genuine headline act, just quoted a 5 year old post wot I dun about mankyDs.  I’ve made it!

[Ingram85]

I’m sticking with my choice of surstromming. . Its like a hard reset for your system. Nothing can prepare you for it. 

I didn’t even taste it, the smell alone makes your vision go hazy and all your senses apart from smell just seem to shut down for a few minutes as your body/brain processes what’s happened and then slowly recover from the smell.

I spent about £25 importing a tin with the aim of me and a few mates filming us eating a bit each to put on the youtubes. Literally the tiniest sniff of it was enough, all I knew was that I needed to be far away from it while my body and senses fixed themselves. None of us got past just being near the smell of it. Tin opener popped it, the gaseous release happened and then it hit. Nope. We put it in about 20 bin bags and put it in my mates outside bin. 

How some sick bastards can eat that shite I’ll never know. They must pray to the Daedric Prince Namira or something. Ugh. Never again. 

Edited July 30, 2022 by Ingram85

[fruitvilla]

What sticks in my mind ... for two and half years I had vacation jobs working for Initial a laundry service in the first half of the seventies. We had to change out the roller towels in factories, shops etc.  I was warned an Indian restaurant was bad, I did not believe my colleague. When I did the restaurant Again I would hold my breath for the minute or two it would take to go through the facility.

A shop that surprised me was Wimbush ... somewhere in Brum; that too tested my breath holding skills. I am surprised the employees did not complain.

[delboy54]

Years ago I worked for Anglian water in the "lumpy water" side of the industry.

One of the processes was to pump sewage sludge into large presses where liquid would be pressed out, leaving a "cake" that was spread on fields as fertiliser.

The smell took your breath away, if you got any liquid sewage sludge on your hands it would stink for hours despite continually scrubbing hands. The only way you could eat your sandwiches at lunchtime was to put aftershave on your hands !

[LondonLax]

6 hours ago, Ingram85 said:

I’m sticking with my choice of surstromming. . Its like a hard reset for your system. Nothing can prepare you for it. 

I didn’t even taste it, the smell alone makes your vision go hazy and all your senses apart from smell just seem to shut down for a few minutes as your body/brain processes what’s happened and then slowly recover from the smell.

I spent about £25 importing a tin with the aim of me and a few mates filming us eating a bit each to put on the youtubes. Literally the tiniest sniff of it was enough, all I knew was that I needed to be far away from it while my body and senses fixed themselves. None of us got past just being near the smell of it. Tin opener popped it, the gaseous release happened and then it hit. Nope. We put it in about 20 bin bags and put it in my mates outside bin. 

How some sick bastards can eat that shite I’ll never know. They must pray to the Daedric Prince Namira or something. Ugh. Never again. 

I’ve tried it. You’re supposed to open the tin outside underwater so it doesn’t off gas as much.

It’s still rank though. The fermentation of the fish produces butyric acid (like in vomit) and sulphuric acid (like rotten eggs). It smells like a heady cocktail of spew, egg fart and old fish

I did manage to take a bite and it does taste better than it smells (just really salty fish) but still not ‘good’. 

Edited July 30, 2022 by LondonLax

[hogso]

Black bin on a hot day with nappies in it