Paddy's "Things that cheer you up"

[RimmyJimmer]

Saturday night.

 

Went out with my missus, her mom, her brother and his girlfriend. Had a few drinks in tenbury to add to the few I had had during the afternoon...so I was pleasantly tipsy without being drunk. We booked a table in the local indian restaurant for 8.30 despite my mother in law not liking indian food at all. She said she was happy just having something off the 'english' menu. 

So we sat down and we're having the 'not liking indian food' conversation and that she was missing out on some fantastic cuisine. Brother in law is joining in, and trying to get her to at least try chicken tikka with some salad. Still she's not having it and insists she's fine with something bland :-)

Waiter arrives so we all look up to tell him what we would like. Mother in law is first, then I'm next, as I'm sitting next to her.

She says...'I'll have the roast chicken with fries and peas'.

But I hear...'I'll have the roast chicken with frozen peas'

Now I start to titter, expecting brother in law to join in and say something....he doesn't, and he's sitting there dead pan. Now due to the 6 or 7 beers I'd consumed, in this split second I could not work out for the life of me what she had meant to say. So it looks like this is what she orders in an indian and everyone is fine with it....which adds to my increasing amusement. The waiter looks at me....he's a funny looking fella anyway, and he's got a massive grin on his face. I then go into a 20 minute bout of uncontrollable laughter...I'm not joking...20 minutes solid. My missus had to order my food as the tears were streaming down my face. I managed to explain what I was laughing at about 5 minutes in....by which time everyone else was in hysterics laughing at me. 2 days later and I'm still chuckling when i think about it. 

Was it really that funny?

I've never laughed so hard in my life though

[Xela]

I very rarely go to the dentist.. maybe twice in ten years. My teeth just seem to be fine all the time. 

I know I should go more...

[mjmooney]

My daughter went out for a meal with her partner, their two-year old, and her partner's 88-year old grandmother. Mum, dad and the baby had pizza, great-grandma doesn't do exotic foreign food, so ordered a baked potato. As they got started eating, little Bonnie decided she liked the look of the potato, so the kindly old dear agreed to swap. The first time in her life she had ever tried pizza ("Is this what they call French food?") She took a tentative first bite - and her face lit up. She loved it, and was thrilled when she was told you could buy them in supermarkets and heat them up with ten minutes in the oven. 

Never too old to make new discoveries, obviously. They're wondering whether to try her on curry next. 

[Rugeley Villa]

45 minutes ago, Xela said:

I very rarely go to the dentist.. maybe twice in ten years. My teeth just seem to be fine all the time. 

I know I should go more...

Same here, I only go when I need too. My teeth are not perfect but not bad either.

[wiggyrichard]

Just read through "The Honey Trap" thread.... genius!!!

[Stevo985]

7 hours ago, mjmooney said:

My daughter went out for a meal with her partner, their two-year old, and her partner's 88-year old grandmother. Mum, dad and the baby had pizza, great-grandma doesn't do exotic foreign food, so ordered a baked potato. As they got started eating, little Bonnie decided she liked the look of the potato, so the kindly old dear agreed to swap. The first time in her life she had ever tried pizza ("Is this what they call French food?") She took a tentative first bite - and her face lit up. She loved it, and was thrilled when she was told you could buy them in supermarkets and heat them up with ten minutes in the oven. 

Never too old to make new discoveries, obviously. They're wondering whether to try her on curry next. 

I will never understand why people don't try food. 

Obviously if you don't like it after trying then fine. 

 

But I don't think I've ever not tried something and just decided I dont like it. 

[maqroll]

I remember when I was a little kid and my family was all out at the local Chinese restaurant..my father had one too many Tsing Taos and decided to stick two stalks of asparagus up his nostrils and walk around our section like a madman. I was in hysterics, my mum and sis totally mortified.

[Seat68]

Ah I have a funny restaurant story, was once in a pub in Newport and my brother in law called the waiter an n word. I got up and walked out.

[Rugeley Villa]

15 minutes ago, Seat68 said:

Ah I have a funny restaurant story, was once in a pub in Newport and my brother in law called the waiter an n word. I got up and walked out.

That's one way to avoid paying the bill 

[MakemineVanilla]

13 hours ago, mjmooney said:

My daughter went out for a meal with her partner, their two-year old, and her partner's 88-year old grandmother. Mum, dad and the baby had pizza, great-grandma doesn't do exotic foreign food, so ordered a baked potato. As they got started eating, little Bonnie decided she liked the look of the potato, so the kindly old dear agreed to swap. The first time in her life she had ever tried pizza ("Is this what they call French food?") She took a tentative first bite - and her face lit up. She loved it, and was thrilled when she was told you could buy them in supermarkets and heat them up with ten minutes in the oven. 

Never too old to make new discoveries, obviously. They're wondering whether to try her on curry next. 

Although it does have to be said that living to 88 with all your marbles, is a pretty good recommendation for sticking with what you know. 

[Paddywhack]

My granddad was based in India during the war but still didn't try curry until he was in his 70s as he wouldn't touch that 'foreign muck'. He loves it now.

I find it odd that he was fussy about that when he's from a generation where food was scarce and he used to eat boiled sheep's head.

[mjmooney]

3 minutes ago, Paddywhack said:

My granddad was based in India during the war but still didn't try curry until he was in his 70s as he wouldn't touch that 'foreign muck'. He loves it now.

I find it odd that he was fussy about that when he's from a generation where food was scarce and he used to eat boiled sheep's head.

My Mum and Dad were the same. And when my Irish Catholic auntie Eileen and her mate Florrie went on a coach trip to Lourdes, they took loads of sandwiches, rather than eat any French food. 

Edited June 27, 2017 by mjmooney

[Rugeley Villa]

My grandad won't touch any foreign food, and the same with my mum. It's the same old 'foreign muck' 

I was 27 before I started properly liking vegetables, and now I can't get enough of them. 

Edited June 27, 2017 by Rugeley Villa

[Wainy316]

Foreign muck is often a lot better than our muck.

[StefanAVFC]

21 minutes ago, Wainy316 said:

Foreign muck is often a lot better than our muck.

1000000%

British food is shite.

[Wainy316]

13 minutes ago, StefanAVFC said:

1000000%

British food is shite.

I dunno, our food is one of the few British things I'll defend.  I think we offer solid mid table cuisine. 

There's definitely better though.

[BOF]

17 hours ago, mjmooney said:

My daughter went out for a meal with her partner, their two-year old, and her partner's 88-year old grandmother. Mum, dad and the baby had pizza, great-grandma doesn't do exotic foreign food, so ordered a baked potato. As they got started eating, little Bonnie decided she liked the look of the potato, so the kindly old dear agreed to swap. The first time in her life she had ever tried pizza ("Is this what they call French food?") She took a tentative first bite - and her face lit up. She loved it, and was thrilled when she was told you could buy them in supermarkets and heat them up with ten minutes in the oven. 

Never too old to make new discoveries, obviously. They're wondering whether to try her on curry next. 

It's a nice story and still a "thing that pisses me off".  Not in an angry way.  More just bemused that someone can close their mind like that.

[villa4europe]

53 minutes ago, StefanAVFC said:

1000000%

British food is shite.

i think thats a myth personally, largely based on foreign attempts at replicating British food being absolutely awful

think most of it has come from my grandparents post war generation but before that we have hundreds of years of spices, robbing the best bits of the empire with a lot of variance, i dont think people realise how much we do, especially when comparing american cuisine favorably to ours

 

[RimmyJimmer]

5 hours ago, Paddywhack said:

My granddad was based in India during the war but still didn't try curry until he was in his 70s as he wouldn't touch that 'foreign muck'. He loves it now.

I find it odd that he was fussy about that when he's from a generation where food was scarce and he used to eat boiled sheep's head.

 

My family used to own a butchers shop where I worked for a number of years. Right in the heart of the black country. A large proportion of the older clientele would often turn their noses up at anything foreign, 'I wouldn't ate it if yow paid me!!' they would say.

'I'll have 3 pigs feet please, and have you got any brains?....only he likes em on toast for his supper.'

 

Brilliant stuff 

[mjmooney]

5 minutes ago, RimmyJimmer said:

 

My family used to own a butchers shop where I worked for a number of years. Right in the heart of the black country. A large proportion of the older clientele would often turn their noses up at anything foreign, 'I wouldn't ate it if yow paid me!!' they would say.

'I'll have 3 pigs feet please, and have you got any brains?....only he likes em on toast for his supper.'

That was my Mom to a 'T'. She swore by good healthy English food: pigs' trotters, tripe, brains, lights (i.e. lungs), liver, kidneys, suet, cabbage boiled to extinction, sago, tapioca, etc., etc. But she considered all foreign food to be disgusting, unhygenic, and dangerous. 

My childhood was culinary hell.

(I'll admit, she did make nice apple pies).