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Stevo985

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25 minutes ago, VILLAMARV said:

I'm just kinda glad pumping seems to mean farting in this story :)

That had me confused too until I read a few extra posts!

This thread for the last few posts has been both mental and hilarious. Although I am seriously worried about the sanity of Padders. :blink:

 

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5 hours ago, Davkaus said:

Disregarding the various social clangers for a minute, surely there's no **** way that someone can whack their todger off their leg loudly enough that it sounds like clapping/loud farts?

BRB

I tried and I just hurt my todger. 

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On 15/02/2017 at 11:10, Davkaus said:

What happens in the toilet, stays in the toilet. You don't talk to people about their activity at the urinal!

Bloke I used to work with ALWAYS started his piss then carried on no hands by placing his hands behind the back of his head (the one at the top of his neck before there are any smutty comments).  I told anyone who would listen about it! 

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On 15/02/2017 at 12:16, Davkaus said:

Disregarding the various social clangers for a minute, surely there's no **** way that someone can whack their todger off their leg loudly enough that it sounds like clapping/loud farts?

BRB

I was thinking that. If I whacked my todger against my leg someone might confuse that sound with the sound of a knapkin being placed on a table :blush:

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I've been using a double edge saftey razer for a few years. It's the closest shave I've ever had, and the last time I bought some blades, I think they were about 15p each. I can't believe the amount people spend on Gilette shite.

I'm still occasionally careless enough to nick myself though, so I can't see me stepping up to a cut throat. :P 

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1 minute ago, Davkaus said:

I've been using a double edge saftery razer for a few years. It's the closest shave I've ever had, and the last time I bought some blades, I think they were about 15p each. I can't believe the amount people spend on Gilette shite.

I have thick, fast growing facial hair, so I shave a LOT, as much as I hate it.

Gilette maybe expensive. But it's not shite. Of all the razors I've ever used, the Mach 3 is easily the best shave. 

Annoyingly expensive though.

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2 hours ago, sidcow said:

Just went into on topic by mistake. Saw the relegation thread near the top and got the hell out of there as soon as I could. 

I just won't go in there until we've won a few games, which might be months away. I got to the point where it just made me miserable. 

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