villaajax Posted May 24, 2013 Share Posted May 24, 2013 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted May 26, 2013 Share Posted May 26, 2013 I read your man who invented velcro passed away. RIP 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tayls Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 What did the orange say to the water? ...I'm diluted to meet you. HAH!!!!! **** off! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villaajax Posted May 27, 2013 Share Posted May 27, 2013 What did the orange say to the water? ...I'm diluted to meet you. HAH!!!!! **** off! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Started reading a book about the history of glue. I can't put it down!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StanBalaban Posted May 28, 2013 Share Posted May 28, 2013 Started reading a book about the history of glue. I can't put it down!! That's going to be stuck in my mind now! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Meath_Villan Posted May 29, 2013 Popular Post Share Posted May 29, 2013 So i went in to the chemist yesterday and asked for 50 condoms ..the two women behind me started to giggle ..i turned around looked them dead in they eye and said .....better make that 52 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 31, 2013 Share Posted May 31, 2013 A Muslim has been shot in the head with a starting pistol. Police say it's definitely race related... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choffer Posted May 31, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted May 31, 2013 Q. How do you drown a hipster? A. In the mainstream! 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted May 31, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted May 31, 2013 How much does a hipster weigh?An instagram Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoony Posted May 31, 2013 Share Posted May 31, 2013 Being a mirror inspector is a job I can really see myself doing 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leemond2008 Posted June 1, 2013 Share Posted June 1, 2013 Kids today! My lad said earlier, 'can we go to McDonald's? I said, 'You can if you can spell it' He replied, '**** it, can we go to KFC instead?' 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted June 1, 2013 Share Posted June 1, 2013 (edited) What do we want? a cure for Tourette's!.... When do we want it?..............Cu*t! Edited June 1, 2013 by Meath_Villan Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dont_do_it_doug. Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 1996 called, it wants it's joke back. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Its was more summer 1995 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted June 2, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted June 2, 2013 Is this the longest running thread on VT? Nearly 10 years I reckon it's got a decent claim! And to keep the post on topic: I got a phonecall from my son's school today "Your son has just been caught spraypainting 'All teachers are words removed' on the playground" "Oh my god. I don't believe that my son would do that!" "Well I can assure you it's true. I watched him do it" "Fair enough, I owe him 20 quid then" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 A mild edit from the Sickipedia entry Stevo? (Not that I blame you, I'd have done the same..) "Starbucks Bans Smoking Within 25ft Of Stores"And paying tax within 50 miles of the UK Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted June 2, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted June 2, 2013 Yep. I just needed a joke to keep my post on topic so went on this sikipedia that we hear so much about. Turns out 90% of the jokes on there aren't funny. Just incredibly offensive. Not that I'm not partial to the odd offensive joke. If they're funny they're funny. But most of them on there just seem to be a random sentence with the word paki in it, or some other such offensive name. Anyway, that was the best one I could find, and I had to edit it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted June 2, 2013 Share Posted June 2, 2013 Agreed. Some (read: "a lot") are offensive for the sake of being offensive. Anyhoo... Corduroy pillows. they're making headlines.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nigel Posted June 2, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted June 2, 2013 Its very rare a good joke is not offensive to somebody! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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