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Things You Don't "Get"


CrackpotForeigner

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32 minutes ago, It's Your Round said:

I loved Cadbury’s fingers up until some snotty kid shoved one up his nose at a kids party, the disgusting brat pulled it out covered in snot and put it back on the plate. I’ve not touched one since. 
 

I wonder what ever happened to this kid, probably became a Tory politician. 

His name was Stephen Milligan I think, your right he did become an MP, swapped the finger trick to something involving a segment of orange and ladies undergarments 

Edited by Follyfoot
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Just now, bickster said:

Shhhh, you'll put @tonyh29out of business for good if that slips out into the wild

I'm liking the flavour suggestion from Alex , but with a slight tweak pan fried Otter and ginger  ..gonna launch them as Tarka flavour  crisps ..

{old joke alert)}

 

Regular crisps  just a  little otter

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12 minutes ago, tonyh29 said:

I'm liking the flavour suggestion from Alex , but with a slight tweak pan fried Otter and ginger  ..gonna launch them as Tarka flavour  crisps ..

{old joke alert)}

 

Regular crisps  just a  little otter

Ladies and gentlemen . . . 'the humour of the crisp-tasting industry'

:P

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6 minutes ago, HanoiVillan said:

Ladies and gentlemen . . . 'the humour of the crisp-tasting industry'

:P

ha  .... tbf to the industry , i  don't work exclusively on crisps , other branches of consumerism also have to suffer my wit

 

 

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21 minutes ago, tonyh29 said:

I'm liking the flavour suggestion from Alex , but with a slight tweak pan fried Otter and ginger  ..gonna launch them as Tarka flavour  crisps ..

{old joke alert)}

 

Regular crisps  just a  little otter

When I worked behind a bar a bloke came in and asked for a pint of lager and a bag of helicopter crisps, told him we did not do helicopter crisps, he said OK, give me plain.

How we laughed

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1 minute ago, Follyfoot said:

When I worked behind a bar a bloke came in and asked for a pint of lager and a bag of helicopter crisps, told him we did not do helicopter crisps, he said OK, give me plain.

How we laughed

On my way to work this morning , i saw 2 peopled dressed as packets of crisps by the side of the road, so I stopped and offered them a lift ...

They replied, No Thanks ,we are walkers

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1 minute ago, tonyh29 said:

On my way to work this morning , i saw 2 peopled dressed as packets of crisps by the side of the road, so I stopped and offered them a lift ...

They replied, No Thanks ,we are walkers

Dog walks into a bar

and says to the bartender "A beer and a bag of crisps please."

The bartender says "Wow that's amazing!!! You should work in the circus!"

The dog then replies

"Why!? Do they need electricians?"
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1 hour ago, bickster said:

Currently my number one, I have a 2 pack a week habit

Comfortably the greatest biscuit with tea - not even close.

Can dunk for a full minute and the thing stays together.  Absolute 10/10.

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1 minute ago, It's Your Round said:

These were number three on my list tbh. I only added Jaffa cakes to try and bait an argument about them not being biscuits. It didn’t work. 

There is no argument. It's been proven in court at huge expense.  They are officially cakes saving McVities tens of millions of pounds in back VAT payments. 

Biscuits go soft if left out. Jaffa Cakes go hard if left out.... Like cakes. That's what won them the case. 

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1 minute ago, sidcow said:

There is no argument. It's been proven in court at huge expense.  They are officially cakes saving McVities tens of millions of pounds in back VAT payments. 

Biscuits go soft if left out. Jaffa Cakes go hard if left out.... Like cakes. That's what won them the case. 

I know that. I should’ve realised that VT will know that too. Somebody will be along shortly to link the full 187 page documented legal proceedings :)

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Throwing Anzacs into the conversation, as they are the only biscuit I know of that can hold their structural integrity indefinitely once the packet's been opened, presumably through either voodoo or some Faustralian (see wot I did there) bargain.

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1 minute ago, It's Your Round said:

I know that. I should’ve realised that VT will know that too. Somebody will be along shortly to link the full 187 page documented legal proceedings :)

Actually I meant to end my post with "which you clearly know" but forgot in my excitement to get it on the board and wait for the instruction to take it to the boring thread. 

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Have any of you ever had the mythical all-chocolate Kit-Kat?  That was one of the prominent playground rumours of my time.  I did have an all-chocolate, supermarket knock-off brand one once, many years ago.  I can't recall which supermarket, and it would have been imported stock into a NAAFI branch.  Alas I have nobody to verify my story, but the memory of it is seared into my brain.

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11 minutes ago, It's Your Round said:

Somebody will be along shortly to link the full 187 page documented legal proceedings :)

With someone else popping along shortly thereafter to denounce the paper as a product of the liberal propaganda machine.

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