Jump to content

Things that piss you off that shouldn't


theunderstudy

Recommended Posts

 

On the subject of poohs, I get annoyed at my work place when I try and have a peaceful number 2 in the sanctity of cubicle 1 (of 2) when somebody else comes in and uses the urinals (2 off) or even worse, opts for a similar pooh session in the other cubicle.

 

I find it an invasion of privacy to think that somebody else is listening to me break wind (rare, but possible), push out, splash and wipe. It annoys me and embarrasses me. I have for a long time, put a smattering of loo paper in the bowl before I start to prevent back splash, and the tell-tale PLOP of a baby's arm incriminating my cubicalised activity.

 

Why can't I take a pooh in peace?

 

For the last couple of years, I have opted to use the disabled, single cubicle toilet opposite the gents in my work place - just so I can avoid the embarrassment of somebody walking in while I am mid-push or during the inevitable wipe.

 

I stand up for the rights of jo public to have a dignified crap and without risk of humiliation.

 

--

Also pooh related -

I hate poohs that take an hour to wipe. But love the ones that require just a cursory, token wipe...

 

First of all, it's poo. Pooh makes me think you're shitting out a cuddly yellow bear in a red t-shirt.

 

Secondly, I'm sure the people coming in and using the toilet while you're taking a dump aren't amazingly comfortable doing their business with you in the cubicle listening away either, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. Just do what most people do and either get out of there before they finish so no one knows it's you, or wait for them to finish, wash up and leave so you never have to see each other.

 

Thirdly, using the disabled toilet? Really? I mean, if you don't have any disabled people working in that area of the building then it's fine, but if there are I really hope one day you come out of there and there's a dude in a wheelchair looking incredibly pissed off at you because he's got a turtle's head poking out but you've nicked his toilet despite there being non-disabled toilets available.

 

I'm afraid I can feel no sympathy for you. Everyone likes their privacy when they're laying cable, but I'm afraid sometimes you just have to deal with it.

 

I can see raver's point, to a degree. When i sometimes go for a poo at work, there are only 2 cubicles in our toilets. That being so, if one is occupied be someone doing a number 2, I'll simply wait, go back to my desk, do some work, and go back 10 minutes later. I really dislike someone pooing right next to me. Obviously there's nothing I can do if I'm pooing and they then come and take the next cubicle, but c'est la vie ....

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

On the subject of poohs, I get annoyed at my work place when I try and have a peaceful number 2 in the sanctity of cubicle 1 (of 2) when somebody else comes in and uses the urinals (2 off) or even worse, opts for a similar pooh session in the other cubicle.

 

I find it an invasion of privacy to think that somebody else is listening to me break wind (rare, but possible), push out, splash and wipe. It annoys me and embarrasses me. I have for a long time, put a smattering of loo paper in the bowl before I start to prevent back splash, and the tell-tale PLOP of a baby's arm incriminating my cubicalised activity.

 

Why can't I take a pooh in peace?

 

For the last couple of years, I have opted to use the disabled, single cubicle toilet opposite the gents in my work place - just so I can avoid the embarrassment of somebody walking in while I am mid-push or during the inevitable wipe.

 

I stand up for the rights of jo public to have a dignified crap and without risk of humiliation.

 

--

Also pooh related -

I hate poohs that take an hour to wipe. But love the ones that require just a cursory, token wipe...

 

First of all, it's poo. Pooh makes me think you're shitting out a cuddly yellow bear in a red t-shirt.

 

Secondly, I'm sure the people coming in and using the toilet while you're taking a dump aren't amazingly comfortable doing their business with you in the cubicle listening away either, but when you gotta go, you gotta go. Just do what most people do and either get out of there before they finish so no one knows it's you, or wait for them to finish, wash up and leave so you never have to see each other.

 

Thirdly, using the disabled toilet? Really? I mean, if you don't have any disabled people working in that area of the building then it's fine, but if there are I really hope one day you come out of there and there's a dude in a wheelchair looking incredibly pissed off at you because he's got a turtle's head poking out but you've nicked his toilet despite there being non-disabled toilets available.

 

I'm afraid I can feel no sympathy for you. Everyone likes their privacy when they're laying cable, but I'm afraid sometimes you just have to deal with it.

 

LOL at the lecture.

 

I have no qualm with using the disabled loo - I for one know that I am not the only able bodied user of those facilities who also seek solitude to perform the required task. We currently have no wheelchair users in that particular workplace. My conscience is clear on that score.

 

Okay - now for your grammar nazism - taken from the Free Online Dictionary...

(   http://www.thefreedictionary.com/pooh  )

 

pooh (puː)

interj
1. an exclamation of disdain, contempt, or disgust
n
2. a childish word for faeces
vb
3. a childish word for defecate

 

 

Pooh-pooh to you ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Cubicle etiquette does do my head in. I can't really complain about urinal etiquette as I can't remember the last time I saw someone break it...though the "run to the cubicle for a piss, someone is using the urinals" is amusing.

But taking a dump in five cubicles and someone picking the one next to you is just so puzzling. Are they lonely? Do they want to share the gas in a sort of man boasting kind of way? Want you to hear their plop in a 'my dump is considerably bigger than yow' kind of way?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Cubicle etiquette does do my head in. I can't really complain about urinal etiquette as I can't remember the last time I saw someone break it...though the "run to the cubicle for a piss, someone is using the urinals" is amusing.

But taking a dump in five cubicles and someone picking the one next to you is just so puzzling. Are they lonely? Do they want to share the gas in a sort of man boasting kind of way? Want you to hear their plop in a 'my dump is considerably bigger than yow' kind of way?

While I don't condone this, when I go to do my business in a public facility, there is only one thing on my mind. If there are skiddies or any mark of previous defecation, I'm definitely not using it. So if the time comes where I can only use a cubicle next to someone, I will not hesitate in making a poo buddy.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I shit at home, my parents, the missus parents, at close families homes, hotel/b&b/caravan when on holiday and at work (1 staff toilet which I quickly clean before & after). No exceptions. Couldn't use a public bog other than to have a quick piss.

Leave me alone

Don't shit near me

Window opens after not during (potential for bee/wasp encounter)

1st wipe use 5 sheets, 4 sheets thereafter, folded on the seam NOT scrunched

Bleach toilet after everytime

I have issues.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I once pooed in the sea. Lapalfan swam after it a little bit.

 

You mean like, he was chasing it as it floated away? You two spend far too much time together.

 

 

LOL at the lecture.

 

I have no qualm with using the disabled loo - I for one know that I am not the only able bodied user of those facilities who also seek solitude to perform the required task. We currently have no wheelchair users in that particular workplace. My conscience is clear on that score.

 

Okay - now for your grammar nazism - taken from the Free Online Dictionary...

(   http://www.thefreedictionary.com/pooh  )

 

pooh (puː)

interj
1. an exclamation of disdain, contempt, or disgust
n
2. a childish word for faeces
vb
3. a childish word for defecate

 

 

Pooh-pooh to you ;)

 

Okay, pooh may technically still be acceptable as a noun for faeces (though poo is the usual spelling), but it's widely accepted that its main definition is to express disdain or disgust. Either way, it just looks daft spelling it that way, but do as you wish ;)

Secondly, I did say it was okay if you had no disabled people, though they are not purely for people in wheelchairs, of course.

 

It's not like I don't agree with proper toilet etiquette. I will absolutely use the cubicle furthest away from the other guy dropping the kids off at the pool if I'm able to/if it's not skid-ridden, just like I will always go for the furthest urinal away from some other chap taking a piss, but sometimes you just don't have a choice.

Edited by Ginko
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Sometimes I justifiably use the disabled loo.  Extreme needing of a poo can be crippling and if there's nowhere else to go, what do you do?

 

first rule when the is a queue for the toilets - try the disabled

 

plenty of times at gigs and games etc ive walked past 10-20 blokes in a queue and straight in to the empty disabled toilet

 

if its not busy, then the disabled toilet has more space... and if you've got a bit of delhi belly then you're doing the kind thing and utilising the toilet thats used the least, it all makes sense to me

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I went in the Womens once and got some really strange looks when I was comming out.

e went to a shopping centre that I had never been to before and by the time we got there I could not hang on any longer,so I told the wife I have to go now and hurried along. 

It`s only after I came out ( and noticing the strange looks that I got ) that I realised some rocket polisher had rubbed out the wo in woman and I was in the wrong loo.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...
Â