Guest Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 When James Milner's Life Story was being made into a film, the role of James Milner had to be cast to multiple actors because the director didn't think audiences would believe such brilliance could be achieved by one man. Even then, "The Magnificent Seven" still doesn't sufficiently capture the qualities of it's original hero. Superman's only weakness is Kryptonite. James Milner laughs at Superman for having a weakness. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bannedfromHandV Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 The U.S. Army didn't find Saddam Hussein hiding in the bunker, James Milner found him. After becoming bored on holiday in Dubai, James decided to go for a brisk jog, after an hour he found himself in Iraq and decided to help the war effort..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lapal_fan Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 James Milner appriciates this thread, but feels it should grow to at least 1000000 pages in length. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danwichmann Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 The E.U. have dictated that the measurement of and engines power will from 01.01.2010 will be BMP not BHP. The abbreviation is for Basic Milner Power The Bugatti Veyron has a BMP of 0.4. It would take 3 Bugatti Veyrons to outrun James Milner, and even then they would run out of petrol before James Milner broke a sweat. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tubby Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 Hitler hung himself based on the knowledge that James Milners great-grandmother had been born... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 James Milner has seen things Roy Batty wouldn't believe. James Milner doesn't think they should take off and nuke the entire site from orbit, he just wants to go in and kill them all hand-to-hand... just to be sure. James Milner hunts Predators for sport. James Milner is the other thing that can destroy Unicron. James Milner can calculate Pi to infinite decimal places. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted December 22, 2009 VT Supporter Share Posted December 22, 2009 James Milner says this thread fails. James Milner removed your sense of humour when you were born. he'll give it back when you fully appreciate him. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Grant(aka_eddy) Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 When the guys at CERN finally find the Higgs Boson particle, it'll have a picture of James Milners face on it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrentVilla Posted December 22, 2009 Moderator Share Posted December 22, 2009 James Milner is the only thing on earth that can stop the bouncing bomb from bouncing, he simply takes it on the chest down on the knee and sends it straight back on the half volley. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Trajan Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 Hitler hung himself based on the knowledge that James Milners great-grandmother had been born... 64 is rather young to be the great-grandmother of a man in his early twenties. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beasley14 Posted December 22, 2009 Share Posted December 22, 2009 James Milner has so much energy they use his excess to split atoms. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paddy Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 The Hadron collider is actually two miniature clones of James Milners running at each other at top speed. If they collide there's not a chance that the world will be destroyed, it WILL be destroyed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sellyoakvilla Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 Milner ain't afraid of no goats Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
leemond2008 Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 a bloke in the pub told me last night that claudia winkleman and jimmie milner are salifou's god parents...any body else and i would say nah your having me on, but i can see this being true Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
isgill88 Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 The saying "the best thing since sliced bread" is only that because James Milner is too modest to have a saying with his name in it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JMilnereatsnails Posted December 23, 2009 Share Posted December 23, 2009 James Milner wrote the lyrics to every single Beatles & John Lennon song ever produced. He only handed them over to Lennon & McCartney when he realised that they were all a bit poncey. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blandy Posted December 23, 2009 Moderator Share Posted December 23, 2009 The Japanese town of Nakagyō-ku has a museum full of James Milner Manga cartoons, in which Milner-san is depicted overthrowing the forces of evil during the half time break of the FA cup tie at Gillingham Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodytom Posted December 24, 2009 Share Posted December 24, 2009 James Milner CAN believe its not butter Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TrentVilla Posted December 24, 2009 Moderator Share Posted December 24, 2009 James Milner doesn't do Christmas Eve or Christmas day, he is currently jogging down to the Arsenal ground as a warn up for the game on Boxing day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Woodytom Posted December 24, 2009 Share Posted December 24, 2009 The mysterious picture in the film RocknRolla is a portrait of James Milner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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