Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2018 1 hour ago, imavillan said: Three young braves come of age and they all ask the chief for the hand of his daughter Princess Rain Bow. There was Rain Face. He got his name from going out in the rain looking up to see where is was coming from. Then there was Babbling Brook, he used to stick his head in the water to see where the noise was coming from. And then there was Falling Rock. He loved to climb on the rocks but kept falling off. The chief sent them all out to hunt and gather. Whoever came back with the biggest bounty could have his daughter as their wife. He gave them a week. Just as the week was up. Rain Face came into camp with his arms full of fruit. He was followed by Babbling Brook with arms filled with fish and dragging a small deer. As the sun set Falling Rock was nowhere to be found. After a week the chief sent out groups in all directions but they never did find Falling rock. Even till this day if you drive through the mountains you will see signs, Look out for Falling Rock. That is tenuous I love it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mjmooney Posted November 18, 2018 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted November 18, 2018 What's made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones? Trombones. 4 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post theboyangel Posted November 18, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted November 18, 2018 (edited) A warning to all you , be careful about drink driving as we are getting close to Christmas and the Police are out there in their numbers checking on people. Last night I was out for a few drinks. One thing led to another and I had a few too many beers and then went onto Whiskey. Not a good idea. Knowing I was over the limit, I decided to leave my car where it was and took a bus home. Sure enough, I passed a Police control where they were pulling over drivers and performing breathalyser tests. Because I was in a bus they just waved it past. I arrived home safely and without incident, which was a real surprise as I've never driven a bus before and I am not even sure where I got it from. Edited November 18, 2018 by theboyangel 5 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 18, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 18, 2018 46 minutes ago, mjmooney said: What's made of brass and sounds like Tom Jones? Trombones. This is what I come into this thread for 2 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AvfcRigo82 Posted November 18, 2018 Share Posted November 18, 2018 What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A zit will wait until you’re twelve before it comes on your face. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AvfcRigo82 Posted November 18, 2018 Share Posted November 18, 2018 How do you make your missus scream during sex? Call and tell her about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jackbauer24 Posted November 18, 2018 Share Posted November 18, 2018 40 minutes ago, AvfcRigo82 said: How do you make your missus scream during sex? Call and tell her about it. My way is different. I just wake her up. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Robtaylor200 Posted November 19, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted November 19, 2018 On 08/11/2018 at 17:58, ml1dch said: Picked up a new thesaurus today. It's nothing to write house about. I lost my copy. I dont have the words to tell you how upset I was 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 On 18/11/2018 at 14:36, jackbauer24 said: My way is different. I just wake her up. My missus said Give me 6 inches and make me bleed I shagged her twice and punched her in the nose Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robtaylor200 Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 Jokes from my 13 year old Grand daughter Why did Alison fall off the swing ( I dont know sweetheart, why did Alison fall off the swing) She had no hands Grandad knock hnock (who's there) Its not Alison How do make a plumber cry (I dont know sweetheart, how do you make a plumber cry) Kill his family I dont know where she gets her sense of humour from 2 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theboyangel Posted November 20, 2018 Share Posted November 20, 2018 Whilst cooking tonight, I accidentally rubbed some herbs in my eyes. i’m now parsley sighted Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bickster Posted November 20, 2018 Moderator Share Posted November 20, 2018 I said, "What are you doing these days?" He said, "I prepare meals for the homeless, drug addicts, piss heads and down and outs." I said, "Oh, are you working for the Salvation Army?" He said, "No. Wetherspoons!" 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Nigel Posted November 21, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 21, 2018 On 20/11/2018 at 08:44, Robtaylor200 said: Jokes from my 13 year old Grand daughter Why did Alison fall off the swing ( I dont know sweetheart, why did Alison fall off the swing) She had no hands Grandad knock hnock (who's there) Its not Alison How do make a plumber cry (I dont know sweetheart, how do you make a plumber cry) Kill his family I dont know where she gets her sense of humour from You just added the grand daughter bit for extra likes didn't you! Holding a puppy was she 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted November 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 22, 2018 I had a dream where I weighed less than a thousandth of a gram. I was like, 0mg! 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Lifeboats Posted November 22, 2018 Share Posted November 22, 2018 (edited) Harry Redknapp said that it was a terrible ordeal beinget surrounded by spiders, webs and complete darkness. But all Spurs managers are expected to look in the trophy cabinet. Harry Redknapp says that it was a terrible ordeal having to eat pigs anus and cockroaches. But all Blues managers are expected to eat in the staff canteen. Edited November 22, 2018 by Mandy Lifeboats Speeling mishsteaks 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted November 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 22, 2018 2 hours ago, Mandy Lifeboats said: Harry Redknapp says that it was a terrible ordeal having to eat pigs anus and cockroaches. But all Blues managers are expected to eat in the staff canteen. He thought he'd ordered Dover sole from the heavily accented French waiter. Turned out it was dove arsehole. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post rjw63 Posted November 23, 2018 Popular Post Share Posted November 23, 2018 Last night I was sitting browsing the web on the PC, when the wife walked in and asked me what I was doing. "Oh, I'm just looking around for some cheap flights". I replied. She got all excited, smiled widely and then came over to my desk, got on her knees, undid my zip, and gave me a superb blowjob. Don't ask me why though. I can't work out why she's so interested in darts all of a sudden. 1 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
choffer Posted November 23, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted November 23, 2018 Saw my one-armed mate Dave yesterday. Me: "What are you up to?" Dave: "I'm going to change a lightbulb" Me: "Won't that be a bit difficult?" Dave: "No, I kept the receipt" 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 On 20/11/2018 at 08:44, Robtaylor200 said: Jokes from my 13 year old Grand daughter Why did Alison fall off the swing ( I dont know sweetheart, why did Alison fall off the swing) She had no hands Grandad knock hnock (who's there) Its not Alison. That's marvellous. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
hippo Posted November 23, 2018 Share Posted November 23, 2018 A very much bindunne but here goes:- Doctor: Sir, your wife has acute angina Husband: Yeah, .....her tits ain't bad either ! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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