lapal_fan Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 The last few pages in this thread are better than any mucky book I have read :-p We've been talking about snapping banjo strings.. you dirty buggar 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I've never read any erotic fiction. Actually, I've never read an 'adult' magazine. Truly, I am of the porn generation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 t'was a rite of passage the first mag purchase select a newsagent in a different part of town case the joint to make sure it's not too busy suss out whether the shop owner was a bored old person (didn't want to be buying 'Escort' off some 19 year old shop assistant) get in, select mag, select broad sheet newspaper purchase, wrap n roll, run ah, thems was the days --------- First time I bought condoms I was mid purchase when a second shop assistant wandered back to the shop floor with a cheery 'hiya 65', it was Anne, the woman from across the road from my mum's house. Now, these days, that sounds like a porn film plot. Back then I nearly died of embarrassment. Worse still, by the time I got the chance to use the third one of the pack a year later, the date had expired. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seat68 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 My mate Jon went to the shop round the corner from his, in a part of Telford, long established shop, shop keeper knew everyone that came in, and their parents. Jon picks up his copy of NME, his version of events state that was all he picked up, he takes it over to old fella, small talk ensues, till shopkeeper thinks, hold on, this is a bit bulky, cant recall a free fold out poster of the flatmates in this weeks edition, opens it up and a copy of razzle is staring back at him. Old fella thinks hold on, this guy is trying to rob some top shelf literature, I better call his parents, Jons father comes, has a chat about urges and the need to fight them and its best your mum never hears about this. Now Jon always had a stash of pornography and although he says he never tried to rob it, I call bull shit on that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 My mate Jon went to the shop round the corner from his, in a part of Telford, long established shop, shop keeper knew everyone that came in, and their parents. Jon picks up his copy of NME, his version of events state that was all he picked up, he takes it over to old fella, small talk ensues, till shopkeeper thinks, hold on, this is a bit bulky, cant recall a free fold out poster of the flatmates in this weeks edition, opens it up and a copy of razzle is staring back at him. Old fella thinks hold on, this guy is trying to rob some top shelf literature, I better call his parents, Jons father comes, has a chat about urges and the need to fight them and its best your mum never hears about this. Now Jon always had a stash of pornography and although he says he never tried to rob it, I call bull shit on that. Wasn't me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I'm probably one of the last generation that purchased mucky mags from shops. Always a nerve wracking experience. Thank god I got the internet shortly after! Although waiting for pics to load on a dial up modem was torture! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I'm probably one of the last generation that purchased mucky mags from shops. Always a nerve wracking experience. Thank god I got the internet shortly after! Although waiting for pics to load on a dial up modem was torture! As opposed the 'torture' you were dialling up 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
donnie Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 (edited) Nothing worse than buying condoms from the shop. Always go bright red when im at the checkout, and the shop assistant scans the packet and gives me 'the look'. Thank god for self service checkouts. Edited June 19, 2014 by donnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 I'm probably one of the last generation that purchased mucky mags from shops. Always a nerve wracking experience. Thank god I got the internet shortly after! Although waiting for pics to load on a dial up modem was torture! As opposed the 'torture' you were dialling up I have a wide and varied taste Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted June 19, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted June 19, 2014 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUyZ6UnLo44 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
troon_villan Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Nothing worse than buying condoms from the shop. Always go bright red when im at the checkout, and the shop assistant scans the packet and gives me 'the look'. Thank god for self service checkouts. Should buy them at the same time as lube for a laugh, try keep a straight face! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Why is buying condoms a source of embarrassment? Bloody puritans. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Nothing worse than buying condoms from the shop. Always go bright red when im at the checkout, and the shop assistant scans the packet and gives me 'the look'. Thank god for self service checkouts. Should buy them at the same time as lube for a laugh, try keep a straight face! done that! bought lube, condoms, 2 cakes and 2 bottles of Pepsi in Asda - and used a proper till fair play to the girl on the till, she handed me my change and said enjoy your afternoon true story bro Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
packoman Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Did the bottles fit? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 like a glove the trick is to pop a mentos mint into them at the critical moment 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 2 cakes ?????? but you would only need one cake other shoppers might find that unfair (cake gate still going) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tegis Posted June 19, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted June 19, 2014 Why is buying condoms a source of embarrassment? Bloody puritans. Exactly, it's a moment of pride you can express without saying anything Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Nothing worse than buying condoms from the shop. Always go bright red when im at the checkout, and the shop assistant scans the packet and gives me 'the look'. Leisure Suit Donnie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Meath_Villan Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 ^^^^^ WTF ^^^^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dAVe80 Posted June 19, 2014 Share Posted June 19, 2014 Nothing worse than buying condoms from the shop. Always go bright red when im at the checkout, and the shop assistant scans the packet and gives me 'the look'. Thank god for self service checkouts. Should buy them at the same time as lube for a laugh, try keep a straight face! Condoms, a cucumber, and some sand paper. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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