Popular Post Rds1983 Posted February 5, 2021 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 My 3 year old lad has started coming out with all sorts of stuff as his imagination has gone into overdrive and I was curious what other people's kids had come out with? We got his nursery report back last week and it said they'd been learning about traffic lights and road safety. It said he knew red light meant stop, green light meant go and when asked what the yellow light meant he replied 'that's when Daddy goes'. Please tell me I'm not the only one being done in by my kid and yours have come out with some stuff too. 1 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post il_serpente Posted February 5, 2021 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 A number of years ago, when my son was around 3, we had friends over for dinner and he was a bit wound up he jumped around waving his arms and said, “Let’s celebrate!” One of our friends asked him what he was celebrating. He stopped for a second, deep in thought, and then his face lit up and he yelled, “Things that are fragile!” That one’s still a bit of a meme around our house. Also, one time around the same age he was in his car seat riding home with me an said, out of the blue, “You know, Dad, I’m always mixing cement.” 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post mjmooney Posted February 5, 2021 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 Understanding is typically WAY ahead of speech. So we don't appreciate how much they are taking in and processing before it starts coming back at us. Our daughter went through the usual one word, two or three word sentences stage, but one day (aged about two) she was sitting in her high chair and suddenly looked at me and the missus and said: "The trouble with you two is... you're too old". And calmly went back to her Weetabix. 1 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted February 5, 2021 Author VT Supporter Share Posted February 5, 2021 1 hour ago, il_serpente said: A number of years ago, when my son was around 3, we had friends over for dinner and he was a bit wound up he jumped around waving his arms and said, “Let’s celebrate!” One of our friends asked him what he was celebrating. He stopped for a second, deep in thought, and then his face lit up and he yelled, “Things that are fragile!” That one’s still a bit of a meme around our house. Also, one time around the same age he was in his car seat riding home with me an said, out of the blue, “You know, Dad, I’m always mixing cement.” Reminds me of one he came out with where he said 'it's very dangerous', to which I asked him what is? After a second or twos thought he replied 'it's dangerous when I'm miserable'. Judging by some of his tantrums this came across quite profound. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Seat68 Posted February 5, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 Last year we had a trip to Chester Zoo and inevitably it rained. I ran ahead to get the car and like a lot of cars, you start driving and the doors lock. I pull up. My grandson tries to open the door. It won’t open. I know where he got this from and I am happy it was as mild as it was. “open the door you tit” 1 8 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodders Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 I remember my younger sister being fun to watch her copy swear words, if my mum scalded herself or something in the kitchen, I'd hear mum go "oh bugger!" then my 2 year old sister joyfully running around going "bugger! bugger!" bugger!" she didn't confine it to the house either. Going shopping was very funny a few times. Another time was shortly after my my grandma had died, and she could pick a vague idea of death up and someone no longer being around, and we were going down to clear out the house a bit, and we told her were going to gran's house, and she looked confused and said "but she's very dead?!" she was about 4 then I think. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandy Lifeboats Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 My niece told the teacher that I was a satanist and she wanted to be one too. She meant Atheist. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paddywhack Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 Great thread. My dad always says he wishes he'd written down all the funny things me and my sister came out with when we were little, because he has a terrible memory. Years ago, my mate's mom was driving to the supermarket with her young daughter in the back when some bloke cut her up, so called him an arsehole. When being pushed around the supermarket in the trolley, the little girl who hadn't really spoken at this point, smiled at everybody she went passed and then shouted "aaaaarseeehoooole". 1 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paddywhack Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 On a similar topic, kids mispronouncing words, when my nephew was about 5 he asked for "Stiffy Cocky Pudding" in a restaurant. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 As the story goes, one of my nephew's once stood up during quiet-time at school, yelled "I'm Spiderman!" then punched the kid next to him. When this behaviour was relayed to his parents, my brother-in-law had to clench his teeth to keep the laughter in. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 Once when we were leaving a holiday and getting the coach back to the airport. We said to the children “say bye to the hotel”... Bye! ”say bye to the beach” ... Bye! then a few seconds further down the road my 3 year old daughter shouted: ”Bye Irish bar! to the amusement of the others on the coach. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post It's Your Round Posted February 5, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 One that stands out was the time my 6 year old lad marched into the living room, where me and my wife were chatting to her friend and her weird boyfriend (James) and announced to everyone that I really don’t like James and I only pretend to like him but I don’t really because he’s weird! I mean he wasn’t wrong, and tact still isn’t his strong point even now. 4 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milfner Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 When I was about 2 or 3, I was on my Dad's shoulders at the zoo, pointed at a giraffe and said "look at the size of that **** giraffe" in front on my Nan. She wasn't too pleased 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mjvilla Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 2 hours ago, mjmooney said: Understanding is typically WAY ahead of speech. So we don't appreciate how much they are taking in and processing before it starts coming back at us. Our daughter went through the usual one word, two or three word sentences stage, but one day (aged about two) she was sitting in her high chair and suddenly looked at me and the missus and said: "The trouble with you two is... you're too old". And calmly went back to her Weetabix. We had a phone review of our 2 year old just yesterday and were told that 'for every 1 word they say, they understand 200'. Just backing up what you say there in bold. When our eldest (now 7) was 2, she used to pronounce the 'tweenies' as penis. So, the better half decided it would be funny to get her to say 'daddy likes the tweenies'. To which she said 'daddy likes the tweenies all the time'. There's been plenty of different things but that's the one that sticks in my mind! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rds1983 Posted February 5, 2021 Author VT Supporter Share Posted February 5, 2021 Mixing it up a little. My FILs favourite story is the time he was queuing in a post office 40 odd years ago and all of a sudden the women in front of him span around and looked to slap him. She stopped when she saw he was holding a large parcel with both hands. Looking down they realised my BIL who was about 2 at the time had reached up her skirt and was having a bit of an investigation. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robbie09 Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 When your 5 year old son congratulates you in front of your in laws for managing to drive all the way to school without calling anyone a Representative for Wellingborough or a retard. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JB Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 I’ve seen some funny misspellings from kids in schools. ‘Raping the Christmas presents’ was an all-time classic. The occasional word removed in place of couldn’t, can’t and count. Although maybe they were trying to tell me something there. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Genie Posted February 5, 2021 Popular Post Share Posted February 5, 2021 6 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awol Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 Got a call one day from primary school of number one son, aged 6 at the time, because he was inconsolable in class. One of the kids, an absolute wind-up merchant had driven their young female NQT up the wall. In an effort to calm things down she announced the whole class would be penalised if it continued. Our lad was terrified the teacher was going to cut his knob off. 1 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Enda Posted February 5, 2021 Share Posted February 5, 2021 After many years, that useless lump finally proposed to my sister’s best mate Allison. Allison accepted his proposal. My 3 year-old niece passed on the news in her own little way: “Uncle Enda, Allison has got in a cage!” 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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