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Out of the mouths of babes


Rds1983

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2 hours ago, Rds1983 said:

After he watched something on TV and him learning about nutrition at nursery my wife explained artic exploration to our son and said that because it was so cold people had to eat lots and lots to keep warm.

He replied thta he wanted to explore Antarctica as he could then eat cake all day and play with penguins.

Where do I sign up? 

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Didn't really want to join in this terrible thread, but I've just gone through some of my work notes and found the following message;

"Dad you ar popeey pans and but fancks for hepin me fum jack xxxxxxx"

Decoded and written in PROPER English is;

"Dad, you are a poopy pants and but thanks for helping me, from Jack"

Couple of things here to digest.. One, the TERRIBLE spelling and grammar - truly only seen in state school education.. This is unacceptable and very upsetting, I've obviously got a dumbass kid.

Two;  Jack is 2 and cannot hold a pen properly, let alone phonetically spell words (POORLY!).  Meaning, this must actually be the doing of my eldest son, who is 6.. 

And lastly, Three; How the hell did/does he know I got poopy pants? 

Blog: Leslie Nielsen: Don't call him Shirley (2/11/16) | Carroll County News

Needless to say, I'll be ringing the school to have words about the state of his English, I'll be booking in some extra tuition and I think it's high time I changed my pants.

Poopy pants indeed! 😤

Edited by lapal_fan
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On 29/06/2021 at 08:46, Rds1983 said:

He replied thta he wanted to explore Antarctica as he could then eat cake all day and play with penguins.

Have him watch The Thing, that should level him back out.

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5 hours ago, lapal_fan said:

Didn't really want to join in this terrible thread

I think this threads great. The thread name however seems a bit full of itself. Surely “Kids say the funniest things” would have been better?! 😤

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5 hours ago, lapal_fan said:

 

Couple of things here to digest.. One, the TERRIBLE spelling and grammar - truly only seen in state school education..

And posts from Dem :) 

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10 hours ago, Rob182 said:

I think this threads great. The thread name however seems a bit full of itself. Surely “Kids say the funniest things” would have been better?! 😤

Thanks for saying you like the thread. The name seems a bit of a weird thing to get upset about (seen a few things like that on here recently) but sorry if it upsets you. I struggled to think of what to call it and that's a well known phrase as that's all I could think of at the time. You're suggestion makes me think of Bill Cosby because of that show he hosted but if any of the Mods want to change the name that's fine by me. 

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1 hour ago, Rds1983 said:

Thanks for saying you like the thread. The bane seems a bit of a weird thing to get upset about (seen a few things like that on here recently) but sorry if it upsets you. I struggled to think of what to call it and that's a well known phrase as that's all I could think of at the time. You're suggestion makes me think of Bill Cosby because of that show he hosted but if any of the Mods want to change the name that's fine by me. 

We're just on the wind up, don't take it personally or think too hard about it.

:)

It's a nice thread x

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57 minutes ago, Rds1983 said:

Thanks for saying you like the thread. The bane seems a bit of a weird thing to get upset about (seen a few things like that on here recently) but sorry if it upsets you. I struggled to think of what to call it and that's a well known phrase as that's all I could think of at the time. You're suggestion makes me think of Bill Cosby because of that show he hosted but if any of the Mods want to change the name that's fine by me. 

Haha I wouldn’t say I’m upset about it 😄 It’s just one of those phrases I’ve never been fond of, I don’t know why, I think it seems a bit lah de dah. 
 

No need to change it 😅

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57 minutes ago, Rob182 said:

Haha I wouldn’t say I’m upset about it 😄 It’s just one of those phrases I’ve never been fond of, I don’t know why, I think it seems a bit lah de dah. 
 

No need to change it 😅

 

58 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

We're just on the wind up, don't take it personally or think too hard about it.

:)

It's a nice thread x

No worries, I'm really not fussed by names that much and it was the first thing that seemed to fit. Two people saying they weren't keen isn't going to upset me (now if there were 3 of you I'd be going full Harry Potter and crying in the cupboard under the stairs).

I'll agree the babes bit is a bit odd from that phrase... 

Oh balls, I guess maybe I don't like the name.. 

Off to the cupboard I go. 

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In the car earlier and Vindaloo came on. We were singing, "We will score one more than you" and my two and a half year old daughter said, "I can't score a goal I don't have my Aston Villa clothes on." And then she proceeded to get upset.

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On 03/07/2021 at 07:12, Rds1983 said:

Thanks for saying you like the thread. The name seems a bit of a weird thing to get upset about (seen a few things like that on here recently) but sorry if it upsets you. I struggled to think of what to call it and that's a well known phrase as that's all I could think of at the time. You're suggestion makes me think of Bill Cosby because of that show he hosted but if any of the Mods want to change the name that's fine by me. 

Man, don't give in so easily. Stick to your guns, your thread, your title

haters know GIF

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On 03/07/2021 at 07:12, Rds1983 said:

Thanks for saying you like the thread. The name seems a bit of a weird thing to get upset about (seen a few things like that on here recently) but sorry if it upsets you. I struggled to think of what to call it and that's a well known phrase as that's all I could think of at the time. You're suggestion makes me think of Bill Cosby because of that show he hosted but if any of the Mods want to change the name that's fine by me. 

+1 for the thread name. It's perfect.

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2 minutes ago, sidcow said:

Man, don't give in so easily. Stick to your guns, your thread, your title

haters know GIF

Nah man it's all good. I used psychological warfare on them and confused them into backing down themselves. 

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The six year old granddaughter announced that she has three 'true loves' at school, but they don't know about each other. 

I see trouble ahead.  :)

 

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  • 4 months later...

The 4 year old was playing with his toy tool set telling us about all the things he'll do at school today. He then moved on to the subject of after school club. At this point he picked up a large black screw, thrust it towards us and announced "I'm going to screw all the ladies at club". 

My wife's now trying to figure out how to ensure he doesn't repeat this at school. 

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  • 1 month later...

The lad just told my wife that when she has 2 more birthdays she'll be 40 and that's a really big number. 

He also told her this morning that she had a big soft bottom. 

Times like this I'm glad she's his favourite and he mostly ignores me. 

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1 hour ago, Rds1983 said:

The lad just told my wife that when she has 2 more birthdays she'll be 40 and that's a really big number. 

He also told her this morning that she had a big soft bottom. 

Times like this I'm glad she's his favourite and he mostly ignores me. 

Christ, if she’s his favourite - what does he say about you? 😂😂😂

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37 minutes ago, theboyangel said:

Christ, if she’s his favourite - what does he say about you? 😂😂😂

I'd tell you but I think if I typed it out I'd struggle to see through the tears. 😂

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Centre parks years ago in the communal swimming pool changing room my youngest son said to the Mrs at the top of his voice “Mum, where is your winky, the Mrs said in hushed tones, “I don’t have a winky” to which he shouted back ,”yes but you have got fur” 

Cue heavy laughter from the next cubicle and the Mrs going ten to the dozen to get out of the place quickly unnoticed 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited by Follyfoot
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