Popular Post Rugeley Villa Posted November 18, 2023 Popular Post Share Posted November 18, 2023 Another one gone. Just been informed an old school mate from high school hung himself last night. Leaves behind girlfriend and kids 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumstopdogs Posted January 5 Share Posted January 5 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T-Dog Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 On 05/01/2024 at 21:29, Brumstopdogs said: I realise there's a lot of work towards male mental health, and I'm all for it, but (and I don't know the answer) there needs to be more. I know people close to me and I've struggled myself, to talk about things when it's not right. That's not to say that people aren't there to listen, but the stigma around it, and a lot of the toxic male masculinity social media stuff in particular, reinforces the stigma. Rarely does the term 'Man Up' come from someone who has their own shit together, never forget that. Keep talking brothers, we're all in this together and we can all help lift each other. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Dodgyknees Posted January 7 Popular Post Share Posted January 7 My mental health has been at rock bottom recently, not afraid to admit that. It’s only this week I’ve clawed my way out of that a little. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Xela Posted January 7 Popular Post Share Posted January 7 Always find January tough. Definitely sitting here with the Sunday night blues, as I face the prospect of a 5am alarm call tomorrow and a full week at work. Not sleeping well either and when I do nod off, I seem to wake up with a headache! I think i've started grinding my teeth in my (limited) sleep as well. I feel as though i'm merely surviving instead of living, if that makes sense. Yet I'm too risk averse to make any big changes in my life, like changing jobs etc. Caught up in a cycle of analysis paralysis as I think about things I can change. 10 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain_Townsend Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 Makes perfect sense, I know exactly what you are going through and hope this week isn't as bad as you fear (the dread can be worse than the actual experience). I was in a job I hated m, for 7 long years. Eventually got out. All my problems didn't disappear but it did jelp that I wasn't carrying twitter around with me anymore. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 17 minutes ago, Captain_Townsend said: Makes perfect sense, I know exactly what you are going through and hope this week isn't as bad as you fear (the dread can be worse than the actual experience). I was in a job I hated m, for 7 long years. Eventually got out. All my problems didn't disappear but it did jelp that I wasn't carrying twitter around with me anymore. The mad thing is, i don't mind my job. Its generally ok, its a decent salary, I can do it with my eyes closed and I get on well with most of my colleagues. I think its just a general malaise with my life at present. I'm well aware a change of job may make no difference at all. Got a few days leave to take that i carried over from 2023. Think ill get away to the coast. The sea always calms me . 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Popular Post Chindie Posted January 7 VT Supporter Popular Post Share Posted January 7 This time of year is always shit. I've obviously got my own problems, but I think even in the times when they were 'better' I still struggled in January. It's just a miserable time of year. The weather's crap, the nights are long, the festivities that got you through December are over, you're skint, everyone you know is skint, work is all new year focuses, you hear a lot about colleagues families and the wonderful times they had and all their plans for the year... I struggled particularly in recent years because, again setting aside the stuff that makes me want to kill myself anyway, it's a time of year I particularly associate with my dad and brings back all the feelings around his death and makes me feel even more alone. So yeah, **** January. 4 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumstopdogs Posted January 7 Share Posted January 7 (edited) 25 minutes ago, Xela said: The mad thing is, i don't mind my job. Its generally ok, its a decent salary, I can do it with my eyes closed and I get on well with most of my colleagues. I think its just a general malaise with my life at present. I'm well aware a change of job may make no difference at all. January is a tough month for a lot of people and as you say changing job may make no difference at all. I'm in a similar position job wise. I normally find having a few things to look forwards to in the calendar helps so you're always working towards something interesting / you should enjoy. 25 minutes ago, Xela said: Got a few days leave to take that i carried over from 2023. Think ill get away to the coast. The sea always calms me . Annual leave to take? 3 weeks vacation incoming On a serious note getting away and having a break is good for the soul. Edited January 7 by Brumstopdogs 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
T-Dog Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 Feels like a lot of anxiety in the last few posts - correct me if I'm wrong. Anxiety is the fear of the future, it can be based on genuine fears, but also, fear of nothing. Address the fears without evidence, write it down. Come back to it a week later and see if it developed. Keeping a note of such feelings and reviewing it, it'll help so much. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MNVillan Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 Thanks to all who chimed in here, my best wishes for you all. Be kind to yourselves. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mottaloo Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 10 hours ago, Xela said: The mad thing is, i don't mind my job. Its generally ok, its a decent salary, I can do it with my eyes closed and I get on well with most of my colleagues. I think its just a general malaise with my life at present. I'm well aware a change of job may make no difference at all. Got a few days leave to take that i carried over from 2023. Think ill get away to the coast. The sea always calms me . Not saying this is the total answer, but how about the distraction of online dating ? Despite you being in sales, you are a decent lad even if we've never met, I get that good bloke vibe from you. Yes, online dating can be a ball ache but worth giving it a go as too much work and little play is not good for you. I am assuming you are single, of course.... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 1 hour ago, mottaloo said: I am assuming you are single, of course.... Have you not been keeping up with his bowel problems? 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 Going on holiday next Monday and I'm anxious as ****. Should be looking forward to it but probably looking forward to coming home more, that's the inherent depression resurfacing. Must try not to be shitty or I'll ruin it for the wife. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 This is how stupid my anxiety is. Got my first day back at work out the way and generally feeling good. Missus come back from picking kids up and she’s had good day back at work too. Then we are just nattering in living room and she says if I die you’ll get X amount from her work place and pension etc. I thought nothing of it then she said I don’t think I’m going to live long I had a premonition the other day that I won’t make old age. She weren’t all worried about it, but the conversation has sent me crashing down and feeling crap. Then she starts going on about our old neighbour who’s dog has got cancer. I thought **** me this is great, anything else you want to talk about. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted January 8 VT Supporter Share Posted January 8 23 minutes ago, Rugeley Villa said: This is how stupid my anxiety is. Got my first day back at work out the way and generally feeling good. Missus come back from picking kids up and she’s had good day back at work too. Then we are just nattering in living room and she says if I die you’ll get X amount from her work place and pension etc. I thought nothing of it then she said I don’t think I’m going to live long I had a premonition the other day that I won’t make old age. She weren’t all worried about it, but the conversation has sent me crashing down and feeling crap. Then she starts going on about our old neighbour who’s dog has got cancer. I thought **** me this is great, anything else you want to talk about. Wait till you get to my age (if you do, ha ha! Sorry) Friends and relatives dropping off the perch with monotonous regularity - and it's all black humour with me and the missus. Keeps us cheerful. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted January 8 VT Supporter Share Posted January 8 5 hours ago, rjw63 said: Going on holiday next Monday and I'm anxious as ****. Should be looking forward to it but probably looking forward to coming home more, that's the inherent depression resurfacing. Must try not to be shitty or I'll ruin it for the wife. Why's that, Rob? Is it the travelling? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 5 minutes ago, mjmooney said: Why's that, Rob? Is it the travelling? No, he’s going back to Chelmsley Wood for a few nights . 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MNVillan Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 5 hours ago, rjw63 said: Going on holiday next Monday and I'm anxious as ****. Should be looking forward to it but probably looking forward to coming home more, that's the inherent depression resurfacing. Must try not to be shitty or I'll ruin it for the wife. I can absolutely relate to this. Prior to multiple vacations I have thought “why even bother, it’s easier to stay at home, can’t wait for it to be done with.” For me, once I am on the actual trip, I typically enjoy myself. Hoping the same for you! 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted January 8 Share Posted January 8 46 minutes ago, mjmooney said: Why's that, Rob? Is it the travelling? A bit of that, plus being reliant on Ubers, not knowing my way around, not having any control of the situation. Plus manic airports . Also meeting someone fairly famous in BB’s circles when we are there. Makes me nervous. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts