What is your experience of mental health?

[mottaloo]

Thanks @peterms, that's a useful reply especially the diagram. I'll take it onboard. 

I'm ok really.....it's just that i was fine pre-outsourcing announcement.....and ultimately i secured employment before the cut off date so I'm thinking "why do i feel this way still ?".

I'm also a bit embarrassed to mention it here in view of what a couple of other lads on here are going through. I guess the one good thing posting one's own issues on here is that i can open up a bit more and say stuff to VTers that I'd be worried telling family and some mates in case they'd be more upset. 

Anyway, thanks again for your advice 

Edited July 26, 2019 by mottaloo

[NurembergVillan]

3 minutes ago, mottaloo said:

Thanks @peterms, that's a useful reply especially the diagram. I'll take it onboard. 

I'm ok really.....it's just that i was fine pre-outsourcing announcement.....and ultimately i secured employment before the cut off date so I'm thinking "why do i feel this way still ?".

I'm also a bit embarrassed to mention it here in view of what a couple of other lads on here are going through. I guess the one good thing posting one's own issues on here is that i can open up a bit more and say stuff to VTers that I'd be worried telling family and some mates in case they'd be more upset. 

Anyway, thanks again for your advice 

If you break your leg you're not able to walk like normal as soon as they put the pins in.

The brain is no different.  It's been using different chemicals, different processes and different routes for a while and will take a while to reprogram.  It should sort itself out, but there's no harm in getting help if you need it.

To use the broken leg analogy again, you'd have no qualms going to see a physio...

[choffer]

16 minutes ago, mottaloo said:

I'm also a bit embarrassed to mention it here in view of what a couple of other lads on here are going through.

You should never be embarrassed to confess that you're having a hard time, just because someone else might be having a worse time of it(@BOF pulled me up on that a couple of years ago in relation to a physical health issue and it's 100% true).

I'm always heartened to hear that other people struggle too and also a bit jealous that so many of you are comfortable enough to be open about it here.  

[kurtsimonw]

58 minutes ago, peterms said:

This is something I'm continually referred to. But at the same time, I get the line "You need to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you".

Bollocks. Everything else comes first before you can accept yourself. That's how confidence, acceptance and being comfortable happens. 

[peterms]

32 minutes ago, kurtsimonw said:

Bollocks. Everything else comes first before you can accept yourself. That's how confidence, acceptance and being comfortable happens. 

Maslow says that if the needs at the lower end of the pyramid are unmet, it's pretty hard to attain the ones higher up.  I don't think he'd say that self-esteem is the very last thing to be satisfied, though it's fairly high up.

[A'Villan]

On 26/07/2019 at 23:37, kurtsimonw said:

This is something I'm continually referred to. But at the same time, I get the line "You need to love yourself before you can expect someone else to love you".

Bollocks. Everything else comes first before you can accept yourself. That's how confidence, acceptance and being comfortable happens. 

I like your resistance to accepting concepts and schools of thought in which you don't feel represent a true reflection of life as we experience it.

If something is contradictory then there is some level of falseness or misrepresentation involved, that's why the world is so convoluted and confused. Deception is rife.

However we need to be careful to remember that life is often down to the way we interpret the experience, and it is wise not to allow our views to taint a picture we didn't paint.

Maslow doesn't necessarily imply that needs must be completely satisfied before an individual experiences the next, nor that satisfying a level will lead to success with the next.

Look at Trump, for example, dude has satisfied every need mentioned in the lower pyramid.

Yet it is abundantly clear he is prejudiced, lacks creativity, is immoral, causes problems rather than solves them, resistant to facts.

He couldn't be further from being self actualised. There is a facade that could give the impression that he embodies those traits, but they are superficial in nature. He doesn't

Same goes for some philanthropy groups.

The dogma that is created stamps conclusive authority on conversations that are still in their infancy should we really explore them.

The U.N have a slogan "involved in world peace", which ironically ends up reading as "U.N involved in world peace".

In my line of study I have to cover human rights, mental health, psychology, sociology, managing response to crisis.. among other topics.

But I am getting off track..

Maslow's human. He's got flaws. But here it is, straight from the mouth of Maslow:

Quote

“So far, our theoretical discussion may have given the impression that these five sets of needs . . . are somehow in such terms as the following: If one need is satisfied, then another emerges. This statement might give the false impression that a need must be satisfied 100 percent before the next need emerges. In actual fact, most members of our society who are normal are partially satisfied in all their basic needs and partially unsatisfied in all their basic needs at the same time.”

 

[Dodgyknees]

It's been a long 24 months, but finally something really bloody good has happened. It's so weird, it's all been since May 27th. That win was the catalyst for me letting go of all the shit and since then I've found a lot of awesome things. 

I'm not sure if I mentioned, but I almost gave up on my career at the beginning of the year. I wanted a new start - but due to a stupid injury I failed the medical. Anyway, I was gutted as I just needed a change. But I've found change by doing something different where I am (in my career). Where I live, the best way to succeed is to brown nose - and I just don't do that, but that's a story for another time. So I've been looking for something which allows me to have a social impact using my skills, and this week I've been offered something which gives me the chance to do just that. To help others get back on their feet. 

I'm so happy.

[A'Villan]

5 hours ago, avfcDJ said:

It's been a long 24 months, but finally something really bloody good has happened. It's so weird, it's all been since May 27th. That win was the catalyst for me letting go of all the shit and since then I've found a lot of awesome things. 

I'm not sure if I mentioned, but I almost gave up on my career at the beginning of the year. I wanted a new start - but due to a stupid injury I failed the medical. Anyway, I was gutted as I just needed a change. But I've found change by doing something different where I am (in my career). Where I live, the best way to succeed is to brown nose - and I just don't do that, but that's a story for another time. So I've been looking for something which allows me to have a social impact using my skills, and this week I've been offered something which gives me the chance to do just that. To help others get back on their feet. 

I'm so happy.

For lack of a better expression, F*** YEAH!

That's got to be one of my favourite posts in this thread.

More power to you.

[A'Villan]

Isolation is the dream killer, not your attitude.

Not the most entertaining video but I think her message has a lot of truth to it.

 

 

[A'Villan]

1. Fear is a bigger obstacle than the obstacle itself
“Tell your heart that the fear of suffering is worse than the suffering itself. And that no heart has ever suffered when it goes in search of its dreams, because every second of the search is a second’s encounter with God and with eternity.”
Any new pursuit requires entering uncharted territory — that’s scary. But with any great risk comes great reward. The experiences you gain in pursuing your dream will make it all worthwhile.

2. What is “true” will always endure
“If what one finds is made of pure matter, it will never spoil. And one can always come back. If what you had found was only a moment of light, like the explosion of a star, you would find nothing on your return.”
Truth cannot be veiled by smoke and mirrors — it will always stand firm. When you’re searching for the “right” decision, it will be the one that withstands the tests of time and the weight of scrutiny.

3. Break the monotony
“When each day is the same as the next, it’s because people fail to recognize the good things that happen in their lives every day that the sun rises.”
Gratitude is the practice of finding the good in each day. Life can easily become stagnant, mundane, and monotonous, but that changes depending on what we choose to see. There’s always a silver lining, if you look for it.

4. Embrace the present
“Because I don’t live in either my past or my future. I’m interested only in the present. If you can concentrate always on the present, you’ll be a happy man.”
There’s no point dwelling in the past and letting it define you, nor getting lost and anxious about the future. But in the present moment, you’re in the field of possibility — how you engage with the present moment will direct your life.

5. Your success has a ripple-effect
“That’s what alchemists do. They show that, when we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better, too.”
Growth, change, and evolution are weaved into the fabric of reality. Becoming a better version of yourself creates a ripple effect that benefits everything around you: your lifestyle, your family, your friends, your community.

6. Make the decision
“When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he has never dreamed of when he first made the decision.”
It’s easy to get overwhelmed by the unknowns and finer details of your dreams. Actions will flow out of having confidence in your decision; sitting on the fence will get you nowhere.

7. Be unrealistic
“I see the world in terms of what I would like to see happen, not what actually does.”
Some of the greatest inventions would not have happened if people chose to accept the world as it is. Great achievements and innovations begin with a mindset that ignores the impossible.

8. Keep getting back up
“The secret of life, though, is to fall seven times and to get up eight times.”
Because the eighth time could be your breakthrough. Some of the greatest novels in history were published after receiving hundreds of rejections. Thankfully, those authors never gave up.

9. Focus on your own journey
“If someone isn’t what others want them to be, the others become angry. Everyone seems to have a clear idea of how other people should lead their lives, but none about his or her own.”
It’s easy to be influenced by others, but you’ll be miserable if you end up living someone else’s life. There’s nothing wrong with taking advice and learning from others, but make sure it aligns with your desires and passions.

10. Always take action
“There is only one way to learn. It’s through action.”
You can study, read, and listen until you turn blue in the face, but the full experience is when you take action, and let the rubber meet the road. Once you’re done aiming, pull the trigger.

[Chindie]

Coming to the crux of things I think.

Since making it to the cinema a month ago I I've been out twice I think for any length of time (i.e. not to the shop a stone's throw from my house and back). Once to take a card to my sister's, who lives 2 minutes away, and I've to go to the doctor's to ask to have prescriptions sorted and to see what on earth rest the point of sending me to Nottingham for help when I can't get to the city centre let alone the East Midlands. 

Not getting any better. I'm kinda at the point where I don't have a great deal of choice, which is refreshing in some ways I guess.

[Ingram85]

14 minutes ago, Chindie said:

Coming to the crux of things I think.

Since making it to the cinema a month ago I I've been out twice I think for any length of time (i.e. not to the shop a stone's throw from my house and back). Once to take a card to my sister's, who lives 2 minutes away, and I've to go to the doctor's to ask to have prescriptions sorted and to see what on earth rest the point of sending me to Nottingham for help when I can't get to the city centre let alone the East Midlands. 

Not getting any better. I'm kinda at the point where I don't have a great deal of choice, which is refreshing in some ways I guess.

Is this driving or walking? Does distraction techniques like listening to music help? Hope you beat it man.

[snowychap]

21 minutes ago, Chindie said:

Coming to the crux of things I think.

Since making it to the cinema a month ago I I've been out twice I think for any length of time (i.e. not to the shop a stone's throw from my house and back). Once to take a card to my sister's, who lives 2 minutes away, and I've to go to the doctor's to ask to have prescriptions sorted and to see what on earth rest the point of sending me to Nottingham for help when I can't get to the city centre let alone the East Midlands. 

Not getting any better. I'm kinda at the point where I don't have a great deal of choice, which is refreshing in some ways I guess.

I have no idea of any answers, obviously. Just know that there are people on VT who hope that you somehow get beyond this.

[Chindie]

8 minutes ago, Ingram85 said:

Is this driving or walking? Does distraction techniques like listening to music help? Hope you beat it man.

Both. Any form of travelling. Nothing works. I used to use music, podcasts etc but that's no longer working.

Thanks.

[Chindie]

3 minutes ago, snowychap said:

I have no idea of any answers, obviously. Just know that there are people on VT who hope that you somehow get beyond this.

I appreciate it.

[Dodgyknees]

10 hours ago, Chindie said:

Coming to the crux of things I think.

Since making it to the cinema a month ago I I've been out twice I think for any length of time (i.e. not to the shop a stone's throw from my house and back). Once to take a card to my sister's, who lives 2 minutes away, and I've to go to the doctor's to ask to have prescriptions sorted and to see what on earth rest the point of sending me to Nottingham for help when I can't get to the city centre let alone the East Midlands. 

Not getting any better. I'm kinda at the point where I don't have a great deal of choice, which is refreshing in some ways I guess.

Hey man, I really hope you can get through this. I know it's not much help, but I love your content on VT, and really want to know you are doing well outside of this forum.

[A'Villan]

@Chindie Just want to echo the well wishes being sent your way. Thanks for speaking about it and letting others in, allowing for potential understanding and even help.

I believe, sometimes, those that go through the worst situations are the ones who are able to go on and give the best advice. Sometimes even if they don't know it.

There's a wisdom and resilience that is unique to those who fall on tough times, regardless of whether they get through it, brought on by enduring the challenges faced.

[Chindie]

Well, I'm still not any better, and will be spending tomorrow listing basically the last bits of stuff I can flog so I can pay the mortgage this month.

Which will take resilience I guess.

[A'Villan]

@Chindie I think you're like an owl, and owls are wise. Owls can see through the dark and navigate their journey en route to survival.

They have an inner light, which is invaluable, because when darkness falls upon the world, at those times, it can be almost impossible to see.

Owls can also turn their head nearly 360 degress, essentially having eyes on the back of their heads, which allows vision that can see things around them where others are blind.

You are resilient, and I hope you don't mind me directing this post at you. I can only offer you my take on your situation, and it is pretty much this..

I think just by talking about it, you are showing resilience and strength, especially whilst your in the midst of it. Added to this, you are open to others chiming in with their input.

The metaphors I'm using are only because I think you're capable of spreading those wings, and soaring to new heights and destinations.

I'll shut up now

[Chindie]

I appreciate it, but, sadly, I'm not an owl.

I'm a cynical bastard with a severe anxiety problem and associated bowels that drive me to despair. I'm talking about it, less as a show of strength or resilience, and more because I don't get the chance to speak about it otherwise and basically, I'm frustrated as **** and no longer care to hide it. And now I get to add increasing levels of worry about exactly what I'm going to do within the next few weeks to prevent my already car crash life having the wreck explode.

But, I appreciate the thoughts and optimism.