What is your experience of mental health?

[A'Villan]

On 22/02/2019 at 22:29, NurembergVillan said:

Thanks.

Some days are good, some days I feel like it's a struggle to keep my head above water.  There's not always an obvious reason why a day will turn out the way it does.

Just being able to acknowledge that reasons aren't always obvious for how things turn out shows a lot of intelligence and insight from where I sit.

When I was in the midst of it all and trying to make sense of the upheaval in my life, a psychologist told me, "It's okay not to know sometimes". And it's true.

You come across as someone who has a generous and kind spirit. It takes courage and effort to be open and vulnerable with other people, so kudos to you.

One problem we have in the world today is that the stupid are so sure of everything and the intelligent are uncertain about themselves.

I hope the days where you struggle to tread water are not like that due to doubts about self-worth. You do make a difference.

[Xann]

Quote

Yes, men get eating disorders – my brother died from his

In April 2017 I got the middle-of-the-night phone call I always hoped would never come. My brother, Eoin, had collapsed, and by morning he had died. He was 41 years old. The official cause of death was bilateral pneumonia but I knew that this was far from the real reason: the truth was, Eoin had suffered from some form of eating disorder for years. His frail, wan body was just too weak to fight a chest infection.

Metro

I can't recall meeting Eoin or his sister, but his brother is an old friend. He put this up on FB this morning.

[NurembergVillan]

After learning today that Keith Flint of The Prodigy took his own life this weekend, I think it's worth putting this link here.

As much as we're all here for each other on VT, it's important for all of us to know that there are channels to go down, people to speak to if we ever feel that things are getting too much.

Big love to all of you X

https://www.thecalmzone.net/

Quote

The Campaign Against Living Miserably (CALM) is leading a movement against male suicide, the single biggest killer of men under 45 in the UK.

 

[BillyShears]

On 27/02/2019 at 07:47, A'Villan said:

One problem we have in the world today is that the stupid are so sure of everything and the intelligent are uncertain about themselves.

This is pretty much a universal truth. Frustratingly sad, and I'm as guilty as the next person of this. Sometimes I catch myself being absolutely sure of something , take a step back, and realise how fundamentally wrong I am. Concrete thinking.

[A'Villan]

On 05/03/2019 at 01:46, BillyShears said:

This is pretty much a universal truth. Frustratingly sad, and I'm as guilty as the next person of this. Sometimes I catch myself being absolutely sure of something , take a step back, and realise how fundamentally wrong I am. Concrete thinking.

Frustratingly sad? When the consequences of misunderstanding lead to dissonance or tragedy it can be. Do you think that feeling, in itself, shapes our reality though?

That you are aware of your fallible perceptions allows you to free yourself from the constraints of misconception and explore the universe for greater truth.

So I hope you appreciate your talent and intellect in being able to identify when you've made an error, that is as important as being conscious of the mistake.

You know nothing until you realise that. Wisdom is found in awareness of our ignorance. The omniscient master is the eternal student.

Inquiry is fatal to certainty. The only thing certain is the unforeseen. When nothing is certain, anything is possible. People tend to become what is believed possible for themselves.

Assumptions about reality are dangerous to make, and like anything dangerous to make, if you make a mistake you can find yourself in trouble.

 

 

 

[AvfcRigo82]

On 04/03/2019 at 14:03, NurembergVillan said:

After learning today that Keith Flint of The Prodigy took his own life this weekend, I think it's worth putting this link here.

As much as we're all here for each other on VT, it's important for all of us to know that there are channels to go down, people to speak to if we ever feel that things are getting too much.

Big love to all of you X

https://www.thecalmzone.net/

 

Thanks Rob.  

[lapal_fan]

On 04/03/2019 at 14:03, NurembergVillan said:

After learning today that Keith Flint of The Prodigy took his own life this weekend, I think it's worth putting this link here.

As much as we're all here for each other on VT, it's important for all of us to know that there are channels to go down, people to speak to if we ever feel that things are getting too much.

Big love to all of you X

https://www.thecalmzone.net/

 

BUUUUUTTTTT...

If all you lot kill yourselves and I'm the only one left... Doesn't that make me KING OF VT?! 

do it..

[NurembergVillan]

4 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

BUUUUUTTTTT...

If all you lot kill yourselves and I'm the only one left... Doesn't that make me KING OF VT?! 

do it..

[lapal_fan]

1 minute ago, NurembergVillan said:

Ricky Gervais would defend my post 

DO NOT WATCH AFTERLIFE! 

[NurembergVillan]

1 minute ago, lapal_fan said:

Ricky Gervais would defend my post 

DO NOT WATCH AFTERLIFE! 

Just think, if none us were here you'd never get another like on your posts....

[lapal_fan]

Just now, NurembergVillan said:

Just think, if none us were here you'd never get another like on your posts....

I think you're the only daft bastard to give me any left now   

And we both know they're mostly pity likes!   

[NurembergVillan]

5 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

I think you're the only daft bastard to give me any left now   

And we both know they're mostly pity likes!   

Sussed me out!

[Chindie]

I'm coming to the end of my tether I think.

I've mentioned before I have a debilitating and severe stomach/anxiety issue. It's ruined my life since it started, but I was very good at hiding it, and I was able to do whatever I needed to do. 18 months ago it started to get increasingly worse. It reached a head at Christmas 2017 when I had to cover the office over the break for a day and had a complete nightmare and near breakdown. It took me 5 hours to get to work. I'd get so far into the journey, my stomach would play up, I had to turn home, I'd then try again, and so on. For 5 hours. After that I ended up working from home for 3 months, ended up in hospital with a pulmonary embolism, was told to be signed off, and that's where I am now. Except I've not been paid since the New Year and I'm running out of money. I was door to speak to HR yesterday about things and for a call to say they would get back to me in a fortnight. They wouldn't say what was being discussed but I'm assuming the extra time is them getting legal opinion on dismissal. I've said I'm keen to work from home again temporarily, even if on reduced pay and reduced responsibilities, but that isn't going to happen.

I'm currently having CBT. I struggled to get to the main place this is offered but was lucky to find someone free nearby. I still struggle to get there, I drive like a maniac for the 5 minutes to get there and prior to that I'm going through 'prep' to leave, going back and forth to the loo for 2 hours, not eating beforehand, being careful what I eat the day before, etc. The issue is severe enough I had to agree additional sessions as it's clear I'm not going to be better at the end of the sessions I've got booked.

I'm taking sertraline which I'm not sure does much. 

I'm currently putting together stuff I can sell to keep me going. How much that'll help I've no idea, but I feel like I'm coming to the end of the road soon or later.

[Carlos_the_third]

21 hours ago, Chindie said:

I'm coming to the end of my tether I think.

I've mentioned before I have a debilitating and severe stomach/anxiety issue. It's ruined my life since it started, but I was very good at hiding it, and I was able to do whatever I needed to do. 18 months ago it started to get increasingly worse. It reached a head at Christmas 2017 when I had to cover the office over the break for a day and had a complete nightmare and near breakdown. It took me 5 hours to get to work. I'd get so far into the journey, my stomach would play up, I had to turn home, I'd then try again, and so on. For 5 hours. After that I ended up working from home for 3 months, ended up in hospital with a pulmonary embolism, was told to be signed off, and that's where I am now. Except I've not been paid since the New Year and I'm running out of money. I was door to speak to HR yesterday about things and for a call to say they would get back to me in a fortnight. They wouldn't say what was being discussed but I'm assuming the extra time is them getting legal opinion on dismissal. I've said I'm keen to work from home again temporarily, even if on reduced pay and reduced responsibilities, but that isn't going to happen.

I'm currently having CBT. I struggled to get to the main place this is offered but was lucky to find someone free nearby. I still struggle to get there, I drive like a maniac for the 5 minutes to get there and prior to that I'm going through 'prep' to leave, going back and forth to the loo for 2 hours, not eating beforehand, being careful what I eat the day before, etc. The issue is severe enough I had to agree additional sessions as it's clear I'm not going to be better at the end of the sessions I've got booked.

I'm taking sertraline which I'm not sure does much. 

I'm currently putting together stuff I can sell to keep me going. How much that'll help I've no idea, but I feel like I'm coming to the end of the road soon or later.

Chindie, I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through all of that, it sounds horrendous. I’m no expert on the matter at all, but have you tried a full elimination diet (apologies if yes, this certainly wasn’t meant to come across as me being a know it all)? The gut brain link is a crazy thing, and I’ve found that mental health issues I’ve had in the past and issues I have currently have been really helped by a change of diet (initially gluten free, and then more recently keto). Our gut isn’t really designed to deal with a lot of modern foods - some people’s adapt, whereas others don’t adapt so well.

Some diets that might be worth investigating if you haven’t already are the obvious ones like gluten and dairy free, keto, paleo, carnivore etc. Again, I’m sure you’ve considered dietary things so apologies if this is preaching to the converted, but everyone’s body works differently so it is worth investigating all sorts of different diets, as some will certainly help you improve over a ‘standard’ diet, even if just a bit. If you’re going keto, I’d recommend the keto sub reddit - very useful resource. There is also some interesting stuff on carnivore by Jordan Peterson on joe rogans podcast - Peterson is by no means an expert and says as such during the podcast, but he and his daughter have seen a dramatic improvement in short term health from a carnivore diet. Rather than saying this will happen to everyone, this can be used as an example of how diet can have a massive effect on health. Depending on length of time you are on any diet you decide to try, you may want to consider long term risks of being on such a diet - some will have more info on this online than other more recent ones.

Also worth bearing in mind when implementing a new diet that it’ll take time for your gut microbiome to change, so give it at least a month to see any effects.

i really hope things start improving for you soon.

 

Edit: improved clarity to avoid confusion

Edited March 17, 2019 by Carlos_the_third

[Chindie]

1 hour ago, Carlos_the_third said:

Chindie, I’m so sorry to hear you’re going through all of that, it sounds horrendous. I’m no expert on the matter at all, but have you tried a full elimination diet (apologies if yes, this certainly wasn’t meant to come across as me being a know it all)? The gut brain link is a crazy thing, and I’ve found that mental health issues I’ve had in the past and issues I have currently have been really helped by a change of diet (initially gluten free, and then more recently keto). Our gut isn’t really designed to deal with a lot of modern foods - some people’s adapt, whereas others don’t adapt so well.

Some diets that might be worth investigating if you haven’t already are the obvious ones like gluten and dairy free, keto, paleo, carnivore etc. Again, I’m sure you’ve considered dietary things so apologies if this is preaching to the converted, but everyone’s body works differently so it is worth trying all sorts of different diets, as some will certainly help you improve, even if just a bit. If you’re going keto, I’d recommend the keto sub reddit - very useful resource. There is also some interesting stuff on carnivore by Jordan Peterson on joe rogans podcast.

Also worth bearing in mind when implementing a new diet that it’ll take time for your gut microbiome to change, so give it at least a month to see any effects.

i really hope things start improving for you soon.

Thanks.

I've fine the low FODMAP diet before. You basically cut out various things that are known to be digested less well. It didn't make a great deal of difference. I'll look to the others, but as things stand I've kinda given up on ever getting better.

[mjmooney]

1 hour ago, Chindie said:

I'm coming to the end of my tether I think.

I've mentioned before I have a debilitating and severe stomach/anxiety issue. It's ruined my life since it started, but I was very good at hiding it, and I was able to do whatever I needed to do. 18 months ago it started to get increasingly worse. It reached a head at Christmas 2017 when I had to cover the office over the break for a day and had a complete nightmare and near breakdown. It took me 5 hours to get to work. I'd get so far into the journey, my stomach would play up, I had to turn home, I'd then try again, and so on. For 5 hours. After that I ended up working from home for 3 months, ended up in hospital with a pulmonary embolism, was told to be signed off, and that's where I am now. Except I've not been paid since the New Year and I'm running out of money. I was door to speak to HR yesterday about things and for a call to say they would get back to me in a fortnight. They wouldn't say what was being discussed but I'm assuming the extra time is them getting legal opinion on dismissal. I've said I'm keen to work from home again temporarily, even if on reduced pay and reduced responsibilities, but that isn't going to happen.

I'm currently having CBT. I struggled to get to the main place this is offered but was lucky to find someone free nearby. I still struggle to get there, I drive like a maniac for the 5 minutes to get there and prior to that I'm going through 'prep' to leave, going back and forth to the loo for 2 hours, not eating beforehand, being careful what I eat the day before, etc. The issue is severe enough I had to agree additional sessions as it's clear I'm not going to be better at the end of the sessions I've got booked.

I'm taking sertraline which I'm not sure does much. 

I'm currently putting together stuff I can sell to keep me going. How much that'll help I've no idea, but I feel like I'm coming to the end of the road soon or later.

Read a biography of Alfred the Great. 

This is not a facetious comment, but dead serious. He suffered from something very similar all his life, both physically and (as far as we can tell) mentally. 

He still managed to kick Viking ass and unify the English nation. 

Just don't eat any burnt cakes. 

[maqroll]

@Chindie Don't throw in the towel. Work through these issues, you can do it. I'd ask your doctor about Neurontin, it's used for a lot of things, and I've found it to be really helpful with anxiety, sleep and nerve pain. No side effects and not addictive.

[Carlos_the_third]

2 hours ago, Chindie said:

Thanks.

I've fine the low FODMAP diet before. You basically cut out various things that are known to be digested less well. It didn't make a great deal of difference. I'll look to the others, but as things stand I've kinda given up on ever getting better.

Please do look into others. Even with mental health issues without digestive issues, diet can play a massive role - the fact that you also have digestive issues indicates to me that diet could potentially really help things for you. Honestly, it is crazy how some people’s bodies (including mine) react to certain foods. There are anecdotal examples of people changing diet and receiving massive mental and physical benefits from what they deem to be hopeless situations left right and centre online - this does not mean that it will work for everyone or even nearly everyone, but it is 100% worth a try to help yourself feel better. For instance, Keto cuts out virtually all carbs, so your body runs off fats for energy source rather than glucose (massive simplification), and therefore avoids massive blood sugar spikes. This is a huge change, and can really help some people both physically and mentally (obviously some being the imperative word here).

 

if you have any further questions, more than happy to reply here or via pm - I am no expert, but I have been researching diet for my own mental health so may be able to point you in a helpful direction! Please don’t give up on yourself- you’re worth all the effort to get yourself better

[peterms]

8 hours ago, Chindie said:

Except I've not been paid since the New Year and I'm running out of money. I was door to speak to HR yesterday about things and for a call to say they would get back to me in a fortnight. They wouldn't say what was being discussed but I'm assuming the extra time is them getting legal opinion on dismissal. I've said I'm keen to work from home again temporarily, even if on reduced pay and reduced responsibilities, but that isn't going to happen. 

Have you checked out registering as disabled?  It would offer some extra protection, in some circumstances, and it makes employers more cautious.

[snowychap]

10 hours ago, Chindie said:

I'm coming to the end of my tether I think.

I've mentioned before I have a debilitating and severe stomach/anxiety issue. It's ruined my life since it started, but I was very good at hiding it, and I was able to do whatever I needed to do. 18 months ago it started to get increasingly worse. It reached a head at Christmas 2017 when I had to cover the office over the break for a day and had a complete nightmare and near breakdown. It took me 5 hours to get to work. I'd get so far into the journey, my stomach would play up, I had to turn home, I'd then try again, and so on. For 5 hours. After that I ended up working from home for 3 months, ended up in hospital with a pulmonary embolism, was told to be signed off, and that's where I am now. Except I've not been paid since the New Year and I'm running out of money. I was door to speak to HR yesterday about things and for a call to say they would get back to me in a fortnight. They wouldn't say what was being discussed but I'm assuming the extra time is them getting legal opinion on dismissal. I've said I'm keen to work from home again temporarily, even if on reduced pay and reduced responsibilities, but that isn't going to happen.

I'm currently having CBT. I struggled to get to the main place this is offered but was lucky to find someone free nearby. I still struggle to get there, I drive like a maniac for the 5 minutes to get there and prior to that I'm going through 'prep' to leave, going back and forth to the loo for 2 hours, not eating beforehand, being careful what I eat the day before, etc. The issue is severe enough I had to agree additional sessions as it's clear I'm not going to be better at the end of the sessions I've got booked.

I'm taking sertraline which I'm not sure does much. 

I'm currently putting together stuff I can sell to keep me going. How much that'll help I've no idea, but I feel like I'm coming to the end of the road soon or later.

Shit. Break the issues down.

Address the work/HR issue by taking legal advice. Why are you not being paid despite being signed off? Can you find decent, free legal advice on your situation?

Never, absolutely ever accept the position of the HR department of the company. They're often wrong.

As far as the CBT stuff goes, I can't recommend it. It may work for you but it may not. Are there alternatives? Normal counselling or some such?

Is there no physical treatment for the issue that may enable you to get ahead of any anxiety problems?

Otherwise (and I realise it's not much help) - good luck.

Edited March 16, 2019 by snowychap