Paddywhack Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 1 minute ago, tonyh29 said: I think the bigger question is why he's checking your prostrate when you only went in for a flu jab He said that’s where he had to jab. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sharkyvilla Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 I stand, I don't like how exposed the anus is when sitting down. I like to have more of a crevice to get in and can get it cleaner that way I reckon. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowychap Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 39 minutes ago, Paddywhack said: lol at 'finest cracks', like you're trying to sell bottoms. "We have a large selection of the finest cracks". I gather it's a very competitive market as I've heard there's not much space for new entrants. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted November 13, 2017 Moderator Share Posted November 13, 2017 I remember listening to a conversation between Russell Brand and Matt Morgan, where Matt was explaining why he was a fan of the bidet and why wiping alone wasn't enough. "If you've just eaten a curry, do you wipe the plate with a piece of kitchen roll and put it back in the cupboard or do you wash it properly?" I don't own a bidet, so theoretically I "wipe with kitchen roll and put it back in the cupboard". And that's pretty rank when you think about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 4 hours ago, Demitri_C said: A very strange topic came up in the office today and i still dont know whats correct. Stand or sit when you wipe? How have you missed this? Its an all time classic thread Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted November 13, 2017 Share Posted November 13, 2017 Sit or stand? How about the third option... 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2017 On 13/11/2017 at 15:42, PieFacE said: I didn't even know people stood up til VT told me... Same. I thought that was for toddlers. It's really really weird. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2017 On 13/11/2017 at 16:09, Paddywhack said: If a doctor can check my prostate whilst I'm standing up I've had my prostate checked and I definitely was not standing up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2017 On 13/11/2017 at 17:13, NurembergVillan said: I remember listening to a conversation between Russell Brand and Matt Morgan, where Matt was explaining why he was a fan of the bidet and why wiping alone wasn't enough. "If you've just eaten a curry, do you wipe the plate with a piece of kitchen roll and put it back in the cupboard or do you wash it properly?" I don't own a bidet, so theoretically I "wipe with kitchen roll and put it back in the cupboard". And that's pretty rank when you think about it. This is why once you've discovered using baby wipes to wipe your arse, you'll realise what clean really is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowychap Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 30 minutes ago, Stevo985 said: I've had my prostate checked and I definitely was not standing up! What position were you in? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted November 14, 2017 Moderator Share Posted November 14, 2017 31 minutes ago, Stevo985 said: This is why once you've discovered using baby wipes to wipe your arse, you'll realise what clean really is. One of the many advantages to having a nipper is that I can keep baby wipes in the bathroom and nobody bats an eyelid! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2017 22 minutes ago, NurembergVillan said: One of the many advantages to having a nipper is that I can keep baby wipes in the bathroom and nobody bats an eyelid! I keep them there and when people ask I tell them i use them to wipe my arse. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 14, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 14, 2017 25 minutes ago, snowychap said: What position were you in? Lying on my side, knees up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted November 14, 2017 Moderator Share Posted November 14, 2017 Just now, Stevo985 said: I keep them there and when people ask I tell them i use them to wipe my arse. A clean arse is nothing to be ashamed of, even in this crazy world. It's amazing how much is still hanging about when the wet wipes join the party. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
snowychap Posted November 14, 2017 Share Posted November 14, 2017 2 minutes ago, Stevo985 said: Lying on my side, knees up. Fair enough. My experience was more Chevy Chase 'Moon River'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Seat68 Posted November 15, 2017 Share Posted November 15, 2017 Side knees up. I only went in for a cold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
HanoiVillan Posted November 15, 2017 Share Posted November 15, 2017 7 hours ago, NurembergVillan said: One of the many advantages to having a nipper is that I can keep baby wipes in the bathroom and nobody bats an eyelid! 7 hours ago, Stevo985 said: I keep them there and when people ask I tell them i use them to wipe my arse. I sincerely hope you two aren't flushing those things down the toilet to dispose of them. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted November 15, 2017 Share Posted November 15, 2017 6 minutes ago, HanoiVillan said: I sincerely hope you two aren't flushing those things down the toilet to dispose of them. The amount of times I've gave my wife a bollocking for doing that. I get why people use them to wipe their arse, but they are a menace. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted November 15, 2017 Author VT Supporter Share Posted November 15, 2017 3 hours ago, HanoiVillan said: I sincerely hope you two aren't flushing those things down the toilet to dispose of them. I am flushing them. I didn't know it was an issue. I shall consider an alternative. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
NurembergVillan Posted November 15, 2017 Moderator Share Posted November 15, 2017 14 minutes ago, Stevo985 said: I am flushing them. I didn't know it was an issue. I shall consider an alternative. Yeah, the packaging says flushable (which strictly speaking they are) but they biodegrade slower than Micah Richards' contract. This means they turn into a trawling net for turds once they get into the sewers. Best way is to go the "Greek holiday" route with nappy bags and a pedal bin. Remember to empty the bin regularly... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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