Gingerlad Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Prob already in here somewhere but... A Villa fan, England fan and Blues fan are all in church when God appears. The England fan approaches and says " Please lord, tell me when England will win the World Cup?" "20 years" God replies. The England fans looks away and says "oh, I'll be dead by then" the Villa fan asks "when will Villa win the Champions Leauge?" "25years" comes the Reply. The Villa fan mutters, "oh, I'll be dead by then" the Blues fan asks " oh Lord, when will we win ANYTHING??" God looks upon him and says............ "**** me, I'll be dead by then...." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 ^^^ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClaretMahoney Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 I saw my mate the other day. He's only got one arm. "Where are you off to?" I shouted. "To change a lightbulb" he replied. "That's going to be a bit awkward isn't it?" I said. "Not really" he replied..."I've still got the receipt". Over my head I guess. Really? Think I just got it, does he mean EXCHANGE a lightbulb? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Think I just got it, does he mean EXCHANGE a lightbulb? Yes, Mr Slow :-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted September 14, 2009 VT Supporter Share Posted September 14, 2009 I saw my mate the other day. He's only got one arm. "Where are you off to?" I shouted. "To change a lightbulb" he replied. "That's going to be a bit awkward isn't it?" I said. "Not really" he replied..."I've still got the receipt". Over my head I guess. Really? Think I just got it, does he mean EXCHANGE a lightbulb? Gabby? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ClaretMahoney Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 HA. HA. HA. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villahero Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 Q..what's got 4 legs and licks ants ? A...2 uncles Soz but i couldn't spell it the proper way could i ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimmie Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 i dont get it!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villa4europe Posted September 14, 2009 Share Posted September 14, 2009 licks aunts? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrissmith921 Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 i dont get it!!! Seriously, close this thread and never return... jebus.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 i dont get it!!! we now have 2 gabby's in the thread. :winkold: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 i dont get it!!! the joke works better if you dopn't speak the Queen's English, and/or live oooop north. Apparently, northeners think Aunt's are Ant's, for some inexplicable reason. :? when i first moved oooop north, took me ages to get my head around someone saying they were going to visit their Ant. :shock: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wiganvillain Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 Tsk Tsk Jon oooop narth surely Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
trimandson Posted September 15, 2009 Share Posted September 15, 2009 As the late great Keith Floyd said in my favourite of his dance movies, "Nobody puts brandy in a korma!" Dunno why the big surprise about Kanye West losing it. When you think about what his dad Fred got up to... David Schneider (of Armando Iannucci fame) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RichardCanning Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Just remember: No one puts Swayze in the coroner Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparey16 Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Swayze's dead...well at least he had the time of his life Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kidlewis Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 What do you call a rapper who gets drunk all the time? Sway Z! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
chrisp65 Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Keith Floyd's cremation is 10am tomorrow, gas mark 7 for 40 minutes Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Double blow for the Swayze family - they'd booked Keith Floyd to do the funeral catering Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
heystally! Posted September 16, 2009 Share Posted September 16, 2009 Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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