ArteSuave

But, as Taarabt has pointed out, he's the same weight he always was. Not that 'Arry would know that, having detailed information on the physical condition of your playing staff is the preserve of professional managers... Well, it's not really. Anyone who can read should be able to use that information... Oh right. Well it's probably best to just guess then.

Not quite: Where was all the water going? I was topping up the swimming pool

Taarabt has never been in good shape though and if he's to be believed he's been the same weight he is now for ages. It didn't seem to hinder him at Milan.

Don't be silly. They might be if they'd built their squads on a shoestring. However, considering several players from both of their squads cost more individually than all 14 of the players we used at the weekend did combined then of course they wouldn't / shouldn't be anywhere near where we are.

That is a cracking idea.

Wow. Edit: Froch on a fight with GGG:

#HomeGymMasterRace.

The best thing about Francis getting the job would be that most of their fans would think that was a good choice. Please Football Jebus, give us this.

Get with the times grandma, some saturated fats (namely medium chain triglycerides) are good. I know you don't care but I thought you might appreciate some up to date info for when you're scolding gym bores IRL. The last thing you want is them having the chance to correct you.

This is a must win for them. 4 points from 8 and Chelsea and City up next. I think we're going to dick them.

Taarabt has come out swinging to defend him against 'Arry's slanderous accusations. Scathing criticism of scrotal face's training methods and tactical understanding too.

It's probably not a popular view because it is arguably the most incorrect opinion ever posted here anywhere.

I've heard that his predictions are so accurate that they transcend conventional league tables.

Ricky burns appears to have put all of his new weight on around his waist in his move to LWW. He looked like garbage again too despite a promising first few minutes.

Pique: Roy Keane still scares me to this day

Their quality varies wildly from barber to barber. There's a guy in the Solihull one that is very good but he's a word removed.

Liverpool 2-1 Everton Chelsea 0-5 Aston Villa Crystal Palace 0-1 Leicester Hull 0-3 Man City Man Utd 4-2 West Ham Southampton 3-0 QPR Sunderland 0-0 Swansea Arsenal 3-1 Tottenham West Brom 0-0 Burnley Stoke 1-0 Newcastle

To clarify, I pick Villa as well.

If you mean he was right as in he was completely **** wrong and his post was a total load of shit then I agree. If not then I disagree.

Yeah "ahahahahahahahaha" we'll all say if things have gone to shit. Those stupid words removed thought something good might happen but it didn't and now they're just miserable rocket polishers! But we were miserable rocket polishers all along so we're somehow superior to them! AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Gabby walking onto the field to see Arsenal playing a high line with Mertesacker at CB:

We now know where our final game of next season is going to be played. I quite fancy a bit of fun in Milano.

It's not that I think we could have had loads of shots on target but our approach was specifically designed to have few attacks. We'd have had relatively few whether we were winning or losing, it's just that the stats have been skewed even further by the fact we've spent more time in the lead than not this season. I agree that the Newcastle game we didn't have enough attacking creativity but we are missing Kozak and Benteke. I'm sure most teams look crap going forward without their two best strikers. We're also still lacking a number ten (at least one that can accumulate enough fitness to play) in those kinds of games.

Yikes! Hopefully you've got a bigger budget than Lambert had this year.

The stats are heavily skewed by the scoreline in the game at the time. We took the lead in the first 15 minutes in two of our wins and in the first 5 of the second half in the other, so you'd expect our possession and shot stats to be low. That's because we could afford them to be low because we were already winning. We wouldn't be averaging so few shots per game if we hadn't already scored. If we still get no shots in if we're ever losing a game then that would be more worrying. Hopefully we never find out if we do or not.