Morley_crosses_to_Withe Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Maybe not all men want to keep pretending to be boys? last time I checked boys weren't allowed in pubs or clubs I guess the point would be though that if that were the case they would say " No thanks I've outgrown drinking Sambuca and having my eyebrows shaved when I pass out " .. rather than making up feeble excuses but the day I start acting sensibly or wanting to shave someone's eyebrows when they pass out drunk is the day I want my one way ticket to Dignitas Nail on the head. I can see what Mike is saying, but what's so boyish about meeting up with friends for a few pints every now and then - to talk about manly stuff, letch at a few women, and generaly act like men. As you've quite rightly pointed out: it wouldn't be so bad if they just admitted straight out that they're totally under the thumb and completely whipped. It's the irksome excuses that wind me up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 To further the point even more, one of the mates in the group I mentioned just doesn't reply to texts or phonecalls in that situation. Doesn't even bother with an excuse. Any other time he's fine at replying to texts, answers his phone etc. But if you ask him something like "Coming out on Friday?" you can guarantee you won't hear from him all week, until Saturday morning when he'll text with something like "Oh sorry, forgot to reply until now, yeah had a busy week and wasn't feeling great yesterday so gave it a miss." Man the **** up! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 29, 2013 Moderator Share Posted July 29, 2013 But if you ask him something like "Coming out on Friday?" you can guarantee you won't hear from him all week, until Saturday morning when he'll text with something like "Oh sorry, forgot to reply until now, yeah had a busy week and wasn't feeling great yesterday so gave it a miss." Man the **** up! You should reverse it on him. Something like this "I'll assume you won't be available but just thought I'd let you know we'll be out on Friday if you fancy it" He won't like that you've assumed his non-participation so early and might try to 'prove you wrong' Either that or he'll respond straight away with 'yeah probably not'. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shillzz Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 On the flipside - If said person wanted to stay in with his other half (not necessarily pussy whipped, just a matter of choice) and he said as much, then under man-law he would have to be the subject of some ridicule for an indeterminate amount of time, lasting no less than the rest of his life. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 But if you ask him something like "Coming out on Friday?" you can guarantee you won't hear from him all week, until Saturday morning when he'll text with something like "Oh sorry, forgot to reply until now, yeah had a busy week and wasn't feeling great yesterday so gave it a miss." Man the **** up! You should reverse it on him. Something like this "I'll assume you won't be available but just thought I'd let you know we'll be out on Friday if you fancy it" He won't like that you've assumed his non-participation so early and might try to 'prove you wrong' Either that or he'll respond straight away with 'yeah probably not'. Good plan. And to be fair we did that on the last poker night, unintentionally, and he made it (and lost £30 into the pot in about 2 hours). So the plan works! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 29, 2013 Moderator Share Posted July 29, 2013 Yeah, subtle reverse psychology. We're such simple creatures Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Some chaps grow up and prefer their world to be a bit smaller and are happy just to watch t.v with their other half, others grow up and need to get pissed each night, others grow up to find a balance. Personally, I wouldn't want a life of justifying my actions to other people. If I want to get drunk and sleep in a bin, I'll do that, if I want to skip a week long stag do to read a few books, I'll do that. Sod what other people think and do what you want. It is your life, after all. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 29, 2013 Moderator Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'm with CED. What I do have a problem with is this notion that at some point you should be 'past all of that'. Nope, there should always be room for everything in your life with no need to justify it to anyone. As someone said earlier, you don't slow down when you get old, you get old when you slow down. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CVByrne Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'd agree with CED but I always want to go out and get trashed with my mates. Bird is for the time in between those events. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Phumfeinz Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 The Benteke thread, or more specifically people talking about the possibility of him still leaving this window. Jesus christ. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 Yeah I'd go along with that, which is why I said my OP shouldn't piss me off. That's growing up. It happens. The bit that should piss me off is the excuses (or lack of) bit. Even from my point of view trying to arrange these nights. Just tell me you don't want to come or can't. I'd much rather that then leave me wondering whether you'll turn up or not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wainy316 Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 I have a long term partner but I would never give up friends, booze, football and computer games. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CVByrne Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Wait till your mates start having kids. Gonesville. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
8pints Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 The simple way to solve this problem is to not have a partner or any friends. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'm with CED. What I do have a problem with is this notion that at some point you should be 'past all of that'. Nope, there should always be room for everything in your life with no need to justify it to anyone. But that cuts both ways. Nobody should have to 'justify' preferring to stay in with their wife and/or kids to going out on the lash like it's some great experience - or put up with all this puerile "pussy whipped " crap. I suspect it's mostly envy. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'm with CED. What I do have a problem with is this notion that at some point you should be 'past all of that'. Nope, there should always be room for everything in your life with no need to justify it to anyone. But that cuts both ways. Nobody should have to 'justify' preferring to stay in with their wife and/or kids to going out on the lash like it's some great experience - or put up with all this puerile "pussy whipped " crap. I suspect it's mostly envy. Again (several people have said it) the "pussy whipped" stuff isn't about the guys staying in. It's about them having to make up excuses for their other half, or wanting to come out but not being "allowed" to. If they prefer to stay in then that's fine. But a 27 year old not being allowed to go out because his girlfriend doesn't want him to. **** that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wainy316 Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 Go out on the lash then come home for the gash. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morley_crosses_to_Withe Posted July 29, 2013 Share Posted July 29, 2013 CED makes a valid point, but it's not all about justification - it's also about making time for friends. You shouldn't cut close friends out because you have a girlfriend or whatever. I'm sure they'd come crawling back if their relationship comes to an end (in fact, I've experienced mates who have done this). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted July 29, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'm with CED. What I do have a problem with is this notion that at some point you should be 'past all of that'. Nope, there should always be room for everything in your life with no need to justify it to anyone. But that cuts both ways. Nobody should have to 'justify' preferring to stay in with their wife and/or kids to going out on the lash like it's some great experience - or put up with all this puerile "pussy whipped " crap. I suspect it's mostly envy. Again (several people have said it) the "pussy whipped" stuff isn't about the guys staying in. It's about them having to make up excuses for their other half, or wanting to come out but not being "allowed" to. If they prefer to stay in then that's fine. But a 27 year old not being allowed to go out because his girlfriend doesn't want him to. **** that. Fair enough. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted July 29, 2013 Moderator Share Posted July 29, 2013 I'm with CED. What I do have a problem with is this notion that at some point you should be 'past all of that'. Nope, there should always be room for everything in your life with no need to justify it to anyone. But that cuts both ways. Nobody should have to 'justify' preferring to stay in with their wife and/or kids to going out on the lash like it's some great experience - or put up with all this puerile "pussy whipped " crap. I suspect it's mostly envy.I agree and never suggested they should. Basically having to justify anything to anyone is a bad thing. But anyone who is in one of those relationships where they don't go out with their mates (despite wanting to) because it'd only cause aggro at home is ... well ... I just don't get why you'd put yourself in that situation in the first place or at least talk it out and explain the situation.EDIT : Yeah Stevo basically saying the same thing above. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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