WAHEY! It's a JOKE thread : Enter at your own risk.

[Jimzk5]

some more commentators gaffes

"You need 5 or 6 players if your going to have an 8 man wall"- Lawro in the England v Paraguay match at the world cup

'If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.' - David Coleman

'Sporting Lisbon in their green and white hoops, looking like a team of zebras.' - Peter Jones

'Forest have now lost six matches without winning.' - David Coleman

I was a young lad when I was growing up.' - David O'Leary

'I took a whack on my left ankle, but something told me it was my right.' - Lee Hendrie

'I couldn't settle in Italy - it was like living in a foreign country.' - Ian Rush

'We lost because we didn't win.' - Ronaldo

[duncandares]

ALERT, WARNING, AND DEMO

Police are warning all men who frequent clubs, parties & local pubs to be alert and stay cautious when offered a drink from any woman.

Many females use a date rape drug on the market called "Beer."

The drug is found in liquid form and is available anywhere. It comes in bottles, cans, or from taps and in large "kegs." Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them.

A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.

Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted.

After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred.

At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings, in a familiar scam known as "a relationship."

In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage." Men are much more susceptible to this scam after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.

Please! Forward this warning to every male you know.

If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men.

For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the phone book.

http://www.brackenspub.com/beer.swf

[sheriffvilla]

A Kiwi buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool.

After several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant, and phones a vet for help.

The vet tells him that he should try artificial insemination.

The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but, not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know when the sheep are pregnant.

The vet tells him that they will stop standing around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.

The man hangs up and gives it some thought.

He comes to the conclusion that artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep himself.

So, he loads the sheep into his Land Rover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them all, brings them back, and goes to bed.

Next morning, he wakes and looks out at the sheep.

Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the first try didn't take, and loads them in the Land Rover again.

He drives them out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure, brings them back, and goes to bed exhausted.

Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing round.

"Try again." he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up, and drive them out to the woods.

He spends all day shagging the sheep and upon returning home, falls listlessly into bed.

The next morning, he cannot even raise himself from the bed to look out of the window.

He asks his wife to look, and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass.

"No," she says, "they're all in the Land Rover, and one of them is beeping the horn."

[sheriffvilla]

A train hits a busload of schoolgirls and they all perish.

They are all in heaven trying to enter the pearly gates past St. Peter. =

St. Peter asks the first girl, "Kimberly, have you ever had any contact with a penis?"

She giggles and shyly replies, "Well I once touched the head of one with the tip of my finger.

St. Peter says, "OK, dip the tip of your finger in The Holy Water and pass through the gate."

St. Peter asks the next girl the same question, Karina have you ever had any contact with a penis?"

The girl is a little reluctant but replies "Well once I fondled and stroked one.â€

St. Peter says "OK, dip your whole hand in The Holy Water and pass through the gate."

All of a sudden there is a lot of commotion in the line of girls, one girl is pushing her way to the front

When she reaches the front of the line St. Peter says "Susan! What seems to be the rush?"

The girl replies "If I'm going to have to gargle that Holy Water, I want to do it before Ms T sticks her arse in it!!"

[Demitri_C]

An English guy is having breakfast in Paris, one morning (coffee,

>>croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Frenchman, chewing

>>bubble-gum,

>>sits down next to him. ?The English guy ignores the Frenchman who,

>>nevertheless, starts a conversation.

>>

>>Frenchman: "You English eat the whole bread?"

>>

>>English guy (in a bad mood): "Of course."

>>

>>Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In France, we

>>only eat

>>what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it,

>>transform

>>them into croissants and sell them to the UK." The Frenchman has a

>>smirk on

>>his face.

>>

>>The English guy listens in silence.

>>

>>The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jam with the bread?"

>>

>>English guy: "Of course."

>>

>>Frenchman: (cracking his bubble-gum between his teeth and

>>chuckling).

>>

>>"We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put

>>all the

>>peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform

>>them into

>>jam, and sell the jam to the UK."

>>

>>After a moment of silence, The English guy then asks: "Do you have

>>sex in

>>France?"

>>

>>Frenchman: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk.

>>

>>English guy: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used

>>them?"

>>

>>Frenchman: "We throw them away, of course."

>>

>>

>>English guy: "We don't - in the UK we put them in a container,

>>recycle them,

>>melt them down into bubble-gum and sell them to France."

>>

>>Hope the English guy walks across the map for you.

>>

[Simon_Jones]

A young man walks onto the stage of Stars in their Eyes, on crutches, with

a plaster cast from his feet to his hips.

Matthew Kelly Introduces him as Simon.

'It's very brave of you to come out here,' says Matthew.

'Please tell the audience what happened?

''Well' replies Simon 'about a year ago, I was driving with my uncle when

we had a really bad accident.

Unfortunately my uncle was killed outright but I survived. I was trapped in the

car for six hours before I was eventually cut free.'

'The doctors had me in surgery for 12 hours but they couldn't save my legs.'

'That's terrible but I see you have legs now.

Are they artificial?' asks Matthew.

'No Matthew. While I was in hospital the doctors informed me that my uncle

had in fact died, but that his legs were fine and with all the advances in

medical science, they could graft his legs onto my body.The operation was

successful.I have been having physiotherapy for six months and hope to be

walking fully again by the end of the year.

A huge round of applause erupts from the audience.

'That's an unbelievable story. So tonight, who are you going to be?'

>>>>> > 'Tonight, Matthew, I am going to be Simon and Halfuncle'

[Grogan_Avfc]

A busload of ugly people crashes into a lorry, all 50 ugly people on the bus and the lorry driver are killed. In heaven, they are queueing to speak with St Peter before entering heaven. The lorry driver is standing at the very back of the queue when the first ugly person approaches St Peter.

St Peter says, "before you enter heaven i can grant you one wish, what is it to be?"

"well," replies the ugly bloke, "I want to be beautiful." "Very well" says St Peter, who turns him beautiful and lets him enter heaven.

The second ugly person, hearing this also requests to be beautiful, and this continues until the lorry driver at the back of the queue bursts out laughing.

By the time all the ugly people on the bus have entered heaven all looking beautiful, the lorry driver is rolling around on the floor in uncontrollable laughter.

St Peter looks down at him and says "What is your wish?" The lorry driver gets up, wipes the tears from his eyes and replies "Make 'em all ugly again!"

[Jimzk5]

if Russia invaded Turkey from the rear, would grease help?

[bickster]

[Designer1]

Never buy a stupid dwarf.....

...its not big and its not clever...

[b23avfc]

the last three made me LOL and i mean it

[stewiek2]

Sick joke time-

Q: What's the biggest cause of paedophilia?

A: Sexy kids.

[Villadevon]

Ayds......dont die of dyslexia

[Villadevon]

Things that make blokes proud of themselves :

1. OPENING JARS - She's struggling. You take it from her hands, open it

effortlessly and pretend she loosened it for you. She didn't. Jars are men's

work.

2. CALLING SOMEONE 'SON' - Especially policemen but even saying it to kids

makes you the man.

3. DOING A PROPER SLIDE TACKLE - Beckham free kicks - camp. A Stuart Pearce

tackle is the pinnacle of the game, simultaneously winning the ball and

crippling the man. Magic.

4. SHARPENING A PENCIL WITH A STANLEY KNIFE - Blunt, is it? Hand it here

love. No, I don't need a sharpener, I've got a knife thanks!

5. GOING TO THE TIP - A manly act which combines driving, lifting and - as

you thrillingly drop your rubbish into another huge pile of other rubbish -

noisy destruction.

6. DRINKING UP - Specifically, rising from the table, slinging your coat on

and downing two thirds of a pint in one fluid movement. Then nodding towards

the door, saying, "Let's go" and striding out while everyone else struggles

to catch up with you. You're hard.

7. HAVING A THIN BIT OF WOOD - in the shed, solely to stir paint with.

8. HAVING A SCAR - Ideally it'll be a facial knife wound, but even an iron

burn on the wrist is good. "Ooh, did it hurt". "Nah".

9. HAVING A HANGOVER AND THICK STUBBLE - When birds have been partying they

just whinge. You on the other hand have physical evidence of your

hardness,sprouting from your face. "Big night?" Grr, what does it look like.

10. NODDING AT COPPERS - A moment's eye contact is all it takes for you to

share the unspoken bond. "We've not seen eye to eye in the past",it says,

"but someone's got to keep the kids in line".

11. USING POWER TOOLS - Slightly more powerful than you need or can safely

handle. Pneumatic drilling while smoking a fag? Superb.

12. KICKING A FOOTY AGAINST A GARAGE DOOR - Clang-g-g-g-g-g-! Stick that

Becks, I kick so hard I set off car alarms.

13. ARRIVING IN A PUB LATE - And everyone cheers you. It doesn't mean you're

popular, it just means your mates are pis sed. However, the rest of the pub

doesn't know that.

14. NOT WATCHING YOUR WEIGHT - Fat is a feminist issue,apparently.

Brilliant. Pass the pork scratchings.

15. WINKING - Turns women to putty. Doesn't it?

16. TEST SWINGING HAMMERS - Ideally, B&Q would have little changing rooms

with mirrors so you could see how rugged you look with any DIY item. Until

then, we'll make do with the aisles.

17. TAKING OUT £200 FROM A CASHPOINT - Okay, so its for paying the

Plumber later but with that much cash you feel like a mafia don. The only

thing better is peeling notes off the roll later.

18. PHONE CALLS THAT LAST LESS THAN A MINUTE - Unlike birds, we get straight

to the point. "Alright? Yep. Drink? Red lion? George, it is then. Seven. See

ya."

19. PARALLEL PARKING - Bosh, straight in. First time. Can Schumacher do

that? No, because his car's got no reverse gear which, technically, makes

you

the worlds best driver.

20. HAVING EARNED THAT PINT - Since the dawn of time, men have toiled in the

fields in blistering heat. Why? So, when it's over we can stand there in

silence, surveying our work with one hand resting on the beer gut while the

other nurses a foaming jug of ale.Aaaah.

21. HAVING SOMETHING PROPERLY WRONG WITH YOU - Especially if you didn't make

a fuss. "Why was I off, nothing much, just a brain haemorrhage".

22. KNOWING WHICH SCREWDRIVER IS WHICH - "A Phillips? For that? Are you

mad?"

[Nigel]

15. WINKING - Turns women to putty. Doesn't it?

Brilliant!! :winkold:

[Nigel]

Take time to read this slowly. If you pay attention to the first two

judges, the reaction of the third judge is even better!

For those of you who have lived in Texas, you know how true this is.

They actually have a Chilli Cook off about the time the Rodeo comes to

town. It takes up a major portion of the parking lot at the Astrodome.

The notes are from an inexperienced Chilli taster named Frank, who was

visiting Texas from the East Coast.

Frank: "Recently, I was honoured to be selected as a judge at a chilli

cook-off. The third judge called in sick at the last moment and I

happened to be standing there at the judge's table asking for directions

to the Budweiser truck, when the call came in. I was assured by the

other two judges (Native Texans) that the chilli wouldn't be all that

spicy and besides they told me I could have all the free beer during the

tasting, so I accepted."

Here are the scorecards from the event:

Chilli #1 (Mike's Manic Mobster Monster Chilli)

Judge #1 - A little too heavy on the tomato. Amusing kick.

Judge #2 - Nice, smooth tomato flavour. Very mild.

Judge #3 - (Frank) Holy 5h1t, what the hell is this stuff? You could

remove dried paint from your driveway. It took me two beers to put the

flames out. I hope that's the worst one, these Texans are crazy.

Chilli # 2 (Arthur's Afterburner Chilli)

Judge #1 - Smoky, with a hint of pork. Slight jalapeno tang.

Judge #2 - Exciting BBQ flavour, needs more peppers to be taken

seriously.

Judge #3 - (Frank) Keep this out of the reach of children. I'm not sure

what I'm supposed to taste besides pain. I had to wave off two people

who wanted to give me the Heimlich manoeuvre. They had to rush in more

beer when they saw the look on my face.

Chilli # 3 (Fred's Famous Burn Down the Barn Chilli)

Judge #1 - Excellent firehouse chilli. Great kick. Needs more beans.

Judge #2 - A bean less chilli, a bit salty, good use of peppers.

Judge #3 - (Frank) Call the EPA. I've located a uranium spill. My nose

feels like I have been snorting Drano. Everybody knows the routine by

now. Get me some more beer before I ignite. Barmaid pounded me on the

back, now my backbone is in the front part of my chest. I'm getting

5h1t-faced from all the beer.

Chilli # 4 (Bubba's Black Magic)

Judge # 1 - Black bean chilli with almost no spice. Disappointing.

Judge # 2 - Hint of lime in the black beans. Good side dish for fish or

other mild foods, not much of a chilli.

Judge # 3 - I felt something scrape across my tongue, but was unable to

taste it. Is it possible to burn out taste buds? Sally, the barmaid,

was standing behind me with fresh refills. That 300-lb lady is starting

to look HOT...just like this nuclear waste I'm eating! Is chilli an

aphrodisiac?

Chilli # 5 (Linda's Legal Lip Remover)

Judge # 1 - Meaty, strong chilli. Cayenne peppers freshly ground,

adding considerable kick. Very impressive.

Judge # 2 - Chilli using shredded beef, could use more tomato. Must

admit the cayenne peppers make a strong statement.

Judge # 3 - My ears are ringing, sweat is pouring off my forehead and I

can no longer focus my eyes. I fart3d and four people behind me needed

paramedics. The contestant seemed offended when I told her that her

chilli had given me brain damage. Sally saved my tongue from bleeding

by pouring beer directly on it from the pitcher. I wonder if I'm

burning my lips off. It really p155e5 me off that the other judges

asked me to stop screaming. Stuff those rednecks!

Chilli # 6 (Vera's Very Vegetarian Variety)

Judge # 1 - Thin, yet bold vegetarian variety chilli. Good balance of

spices and peppers.

Judge # 2 - The best yet. Aggressive use of peppers, onions and garlic.

Superb.

Judge # 3 - I 5hat myself when I farted and I'm worried it will eat

through the chair. No one seems inclined to stand behind me except that

Sally. She must be kinkier than I thought. Can't feel my lips any

more. I need to wipe my butt with a snow cone.

Chilli # 7 (Susan's Screaming Sensation Chilli)

Judge # 1 - A mediocre chilli with too much reliance on canned peppers.

Judge # 2 - Ho Hum, tastes as if the chef literally threw in a can of

chilli peppers at the last moment. I should note that I am worried

about Judge # 3. He appears to be in a bit of distress as he is cursing

uncontrollably.

Judge #3 - (Frank). You could place a grenade in my mouth, pull the pin,

and I wouldn't feel a thing. I've lost the sight in one eye and the

world sounds like it is made of rushing water. My shirt is covered with

chilli, which slid out of my mouth. My pants are full of lava-like

stuff which matches my shirt. At least during the autopsy, they'll know

what killed me. I've decided to stop breathing, it's too painful. Sod

it; I'm not getting any oxygen anyway. If I need air, I'll just suck it

in through the four inch hole in my stomach.

Chilli # 8 (Tommy's Toe-nail Curling Chilli)

Judge # 1 - The perfect ending, this is a nice blended chilli. Not too

bold but spicy enough to declare its existence.

Judge # 2 -This final entry is a good, balanced chilli. Neither mild

nor hot. Sorry to see that most of it was lost when Judge # 3 passed

out, fell over and pulled the chilli pot down on top of himself. Not

sure if he's going to make it. Poor Dude, wonder how he'd have reacted

to a really hot chilli?

[claretman]

^^^^^^ ^^^^^^

[Danwichmann]

>>>>>50 Things that change after University: >>> >>>>>> >>> >1. 6:00 am is when you get up, not when you go to sleep 2.>>>>> >>>Having sex>>>>> >>> >in a single bed is absurd.>>>>> >>> >3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.>>>>> >>> >4. Your fantasies of having sex with three women with lesbian>>>>> >>> >tendancies are replaced by fantasies of having sex with anyone>>>>> >>>at all.>>>>> >>> >5. You don't volunteer for clinical trials at the local hospital>>>>> >>>6. You>>>>> >>> >know all of the people sleeping in your house.>>>>> >>> >7. You hear your favourite song in the lift at work.>>>>> >>> >9. The bank manager doesn't write threatening letters any>>>>>more.>>>>> >>> >10. You carry an umbrella.>>>>> >>> >11.Seven-day benders are no longer realistic.>>>>> >>> >12. You don't go to Tesco's with all>>>>> >>> >your friends.>>>>> >>> >13. You have standing orders and direct debits.>>>>> >>> >14.The heating works in your house.>>>>> >>> >15.Your friends marry and divorce instead of get together and>>>>> >>>break-up.>>>>> >>> >16.You pay the government thousands of pounds every year.>>>>> >>> >17.You go from 130 days of holidays to 20.>>>>> >>> >18.Jeans and a jumper no longer qualify as 'dressed up'.>>>>> >>> >19.You' re the one calling the>>>>> >>> >police because those damn kids next>>>>> >>> >door won't turn down the stereo.>>>>> >>> >20. you get out of bed in the morning even if it's>>>>>raining.>>>>> >>> >21.Washing up is not an annual ritual.>>>>> >>> >22.Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around>>>>> >>>you.>>>>> >>> >23.You don't know what time the kebab shop closes anymore.>>>>> >>> >24.Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.>>>>> >>> >25.You feed your dog Pal instead of McDonalds.>>>>> >>> >26.You don't get ideas for drinks from local tramps.>>>>> >>> >27.You don't put half-finished curries in the fridge to eat>>>>> >>>later.>>>>> >>> >28.You don't spend half your day strategically planning pub>>>>> >>>crawls.>>>>> >>> >29.You "hate scrounging students".>>>>> >>> >30.You no longer have a strange attraction to road signs when>>>>> >>>drunk.>>>>> >>> >31.Sleeping in the lounge is a>>>>>no-no.>>>>> >>> >32.You can't persuade your flatmates to 'Drink till dawn'.>>>>> >>> >33.You don't spend Wednesday afternoons in the pub.>>>>> >>> >34.You always know where you are when you wake up.>>>>> >>> >35.You no longer take naps from noon to 6 p.m.>>>>> >>> >36.A fire in the kitchen is not a laugh.>>>>> >>> >37.You go to the chemist for Panadol and antacids, not>>>>> >>> >>>>>> >>> >condoms and pregnancy test kits.>>>>> >>> >38. A £3 bottle of wine is no longer 'pretty good stuff'.>>>>> >>> >39.You can remember the name of the person you wake up next to.>>>>> >>> >40.You actually eat breakfast foods at breakfast time.>>>>> >>> >41.You don't have mice living in your kitchen.>>>>> >>> >42.Grocery lists are longer than pot noodles & cans of>>>>>lager.>>>>> >>> >43.You don't go to Liquor Save to buy Vodka.>>>>> >>> >44.You have hoovered.>>>>> >>> >45.Breaking the law means doing 40 in a 30 zone.>>>>> >>> >46.'I just can't drink the way I used to' replaces 'I'm never>>>>> >>>going to>>>>> >>> >drink that much again'.>>>>> >>> >47.Over 90% of the time you spend in front of a computer is for>>>>> >>>real>>>>> >>> >work.>>>>> >>> >48.You don't experiment with banned substances.>>>>> >>> >49.You don't get drunk at home, to save money, before going to a>>>>> >>>pub.>>>>> >>> >50. You dont find a "dump" left in the toilet hysterically funny>>>>> >>> >anymore

[Villadevon]

INTERNATIONAL RULES OF MANHOOD

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is ok for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:

a. When a heroic dog dies to save its master.

b. The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.

c. After wrecking your boss' car.

d. One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".

e. When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a Stag night may be legally killed and

eaten by his friend

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of

jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits

forever unless you actually marry her

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden.

However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man.

In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the

weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other men watching a sporting event, you may ask the

score of the game in progress, but you may never ask whose playing.

10: You may flatulate in front of a woman only after you have brought her to

climax. If you trap her head under the covers for the purpose of flatulent

entertainment, she's officially your girlfriend.

11: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're

sunning on a tropical beach... and it's delivered by a topless model and

only when it's free.

12: Only in situations of moral and/or physical peril are you allowed to

kick another guy in the nuts.

13: Unless you're in prison..... never fight naked.

14: Friends don't let friends wear Speedos. ...Ever. Issue closed.

15: If a man's fly is down, that's his problem, you didn't see anything.

16: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies

until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as

much as the other sports watchers.

17: A man in the company of a hot, suggestively dressed woman must remain

sober enough to fight.

18: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza,

but not both, that's just greedy.

19: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about

his choice of beer.

20: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours,

except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

21: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while he is lifting

weights:

a. Yeah, Baby, Push it!

b. C'mon, give me one more! Harder!

c. Another set and we can hit the showers!

22: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e.

Both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an

almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

23: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than

you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if

necessary.

24: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have

carnal drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is

no reason for you not to nail her again before the discussion about what a

big mistake it was occurs.

25: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her

to drive yours.

26: Thou shall not buy a car in the colours of brown, pink, lime green,

orange or sky blue.

27: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?"

with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

28: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics.

Ever.

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know

the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the

definition of each is listed below.

GUTS - is arriving home late after a night out with the guys,

Being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to ask,

"Are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"

BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of

perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and

having the balls to say, "You're next!"

[Trinity-Tom]

BALLS - is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of

perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and

having the balls to say, "You're next!"

I must try that one! Got into trouble with my girlfriend last night for calling her when drunk to say I was going to get some strippers in. I was joking, she was not laughing!