Things that piss you off that shouldn't

[bickster]

People who push in at queues.

 

A few weeks ago when I was getting my shopping there was a bloke standing behind me with just two items so I told him to carry on and go ahead instead of waiting for me to get £30 or £40 worth of shit, others must have noticed me do this as I saw 2 people in other queues look around and do exactly the same thing straight after.

I was quite pleased with that, it doesn't take much to do something like that.

 

It's like when you are going up the bar and you tell the barstaff that there was someone before you, the person gives you a nod of the head to say 'cheers' then proceeds to order 4 pints of carling, 3 stella, 2 double vodka and cokes, 4 tequila slammers and a double JD and coke...then he pays on his card, all the time you are waiting to get 2 pints of lager, THAT is what **** me off

People with fewer than items in a normal checkout queue generally piss me of tbh. I point out to them where the express / hand basket only tills are.

Its usually old people however and they simply dont get it

 

Nope not in this place is no express tills or anything like that

Fairy nuff I'd do the same then

[drat01]

Last week was checking out of a very good hotel in Jo'burg, where I have stayed many times. So often I know the staff very well and they know me. The security guys (all SA hotels have these) are typically Zulu's, over 6' 4" and built like proverbial brick Sh!t house - but good blokes who I always have a laugh with. When I was in the normal Friday morning queue to check out, this guy of Arab descent basically just pushed in and demanded that the very nice (and pretty) young lady behind the desk served him first. I pointed out to him that there was a line of people before him, to which he replied that "he had been waiting before us" (lies he had just turned up) and that "he did not need to queue".

 

The young lady behind the desk said "You are correct sir, you do not need to queue, ................ BUT I will deal with those people in the queue before I deal with you" (smile)

 

After this she started to deal with my check out and the Arab gentleman started cursing and shouting to which I just stared and smiled

 

Enter my "mate" the 6' 4" Zulu security guy, who just towered over him, turned to me and said "Hey Ian, everything OK with the little guy here? I am sure he just got lost on his way to the back of the queue and was angry about that" :-) . Small Arab guy, looked around at smiling security man, smiling me, smiling girl behind desk, and smiling others in queue and scurried off to the back of the queue.

[mjmooney]

Excellent. Should be in the "Cheer you up" thread. 

[Wainy316]

The knee jerk reaction because some former child star writhed around in a nude bikini whilst stimulating herself with a foam finger.

[leemond2008]

I don't really know who Miley Cyrus is (isn't she Hannah Montana or something like that)

What is this stuff all about that she has supposed to have done? is it as bad as what they are saying?

She is a bit of a munter anyway aint she?

[BOF]

Unless I'm missing something, all she did was dance at the VMAs the way they dance in Robin Thicke's 'Blurred Lines'. That's it. A provocative dance. The sanctimony and fauxtrage is almost too much to bear

[AVFCforever1991]

She is a distraction technique the mainstream media use to divert away from the real news.

[Anthony]

She is a distraction technique the mainstream media use to divert away from the real news.

Uh, sorry, what? Was looking at your avatar.

[AVFCforever1991]

 

She is a distraction technique the mainstream media use to divert away from the real news.

Uh, sorry, what? Was looking at your avatar.

 

 

Testing you

[StefanAVFC]

Have you seen the conspiracy that the real Miley Cyrus is dead?

Hi-la-ri-ous

[BOF]

No but Hannah Montana certainly is

[Phumfeinz]

This post making the rounds on Facebook. A bit lengthy, all of it facepalm-worthy. How paranoid and gullible can you be?

 

 

 

Please read, and pass on.

An important message from the Police - please pass this along to all the women you know.....

This actually happened a few weeks ago on the M3 FLEET SERVICES!!! 

It was early evening, and a young girl stopped to get petrol. She filled her tank and walked into the store to pay for her petrol.. The cashier told her, 'Don't pay for your petrol yet......walk around the store for a while, and act as if you're picking up some other things to buy. A man just got into the back of your car. I've called the police, and they're on their way'. 

When the police arrived, they found the man in the back seat of the girl's car and asked him what he was doing. He replied, he was joining a gang, and the initiation to join is to kidnap a woman and bring her back to the gang to be raped by every member of the gang. If the woman was still alive by the time they finish with her then they let her go. According to the police that night, there is a new gang forming here, originating from London . The scary part of this is, because the guy didn't have a weapon on him, the police could only charge him with trespassing.... 

He's back on the street and free to try again. Something similar to this happened at the Tesco garage on Cardiff Road in Newport recently, but luckily the cashier saw the man get into her car. Please be aware of what's going on around you, and warn your family and friends. 

LADIES, you or one of your family or friends could be the next victim. Please forward this on to everyone you know. Please do not discard this message; it is very important that everyone knows what is happening. Please be careful when leaving your vehicle, and make sure it is ALWAYS LOCKED to prevent this from happening to you.

FROM THE MET POLICE
In light of the recent kidnapping and now murder of Leigh Mathews, I think it is important to read the following info for your own safety. Things women should know to stay safe: Please take the time to read these pointers. There may be just one or two you hadn't thought of. After reading this, forward it to someone you care about. It never hurts to be careful in this crazy world we live in.

1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do!

2. if a robber asks for your handbag, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you..... He is probably more interested in your handbag than you, and he will go for the handbag. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. if you are ever thrown into the boot of a car: Kick out the back tail lights, and stick your arm through the hole and start waving. The driver won't see you, but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping, eating, working, etc, and just sit (doing their cheque book, or making a list). DON'T DO THIS! A predator could be watching you and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side, and attack you. AS SOON AS YOU GET INTO YOUR CAR LOCK THE DOORS AND LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in car park:
a) Be aware: look around you, look into your car, look at the passenger side floor, and check the back seat.
If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most attacker’s surprise their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.
c) Look at the car parked on the driver's side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the shop, or work, and get guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the lift instead of the stairs. Stairwells are horrible places to be alone, and the perfect crime spot.

7. if the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; and even then, it most likely WILL NOT BE A VITAL ORGAN. 

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: 
STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women, He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked "for help" into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

9. Another safety point: 
Someone just told me that her friend heard a crying baby on her porch the night before last, and she called the police because it was late and she thought it was weird. The police told her, 'Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' The lady then said that it sounded like the baby had crawled near a window, and she was worried that it would crawl to the street and get run over. The policeman said, 'We already have a unit on the way. Whatever you do, DO NOT open the door.' He told her that they think a serial killer has a baby's cry recorded and uses it to coax women out of their homes, thinking that someone dropped off a baby. He said they have not verified it, but have had several calls from women saying that they hear babies' cries outside their doors when they're home alone at night.
I'd like you to forward this to all the women you know. It may save a life.
A candle is not dimmed by lighting another candle. Send this to any woman you know who may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it, and it's better safe than sorry.
TO ALL CAR OWNERS AND CAR DRIVERS: PLEASE READ

Warning!!!! Be aware of new car-jacking scheme ..You walk across the car park, unlock your car and get inside. Then you lock all your doors, start the engine and shift or put into reverse. You look into the rear-view mirror to back out of your parking space, and you notice apiece of paper stuck to the middle of the rear window. So, you shift the gear stick back into park or neutral, unlock your doors and jump out of your car to remove that paper, or whatever it is that is obstructing your view.
When you reach the back of your car that is when the car-jackers appear out of nowhere, jump into your car and takeoff!! Your engine was running, you would have left your purse in the car, and they practically mow you down as they speed off in your car.
BE AWARE OF THIS NEW SCHEME THAT IS NOW BEING USED IN LONDON , MANCHESTER , AND MAKING ITS WAY ACROSS THE COUNTRY!!!

Just drive away, and remove the paper later! It is stuck to your window, and be thankful that you read this email. I hope you will forward this to friends and family, especially to women! A purse contains all identification, and you certainly do NOT want someone getting your home address. They already HAVE your keys! 

Edited August 28, 2013 by Phumfeinz

[StefanAVFC]

What makes me laugh is that the criminals aren't usually clever enough to think of all these schemes and the words removed who scaremonger on fb give them the ideas

[donnie]

Hawksbee and Jacob show on talk sport.

Annoys me because hawksbee is an absolutely brilliant radio presenter. Funny, intelligent, knows his stuff. However his oap sidekick Jacobs annoys the hell out of me. Just laughs like a mong at hawksbees jokes. Has nothing funny to say or intresting just intrupts and talks about either himself or chelsea

[Jimzk5]

Stopped using Facebook months ago, but id guarantee atleast 3 gullible people i know would post that

[Wainy316]

The fact that there is a badger cull going on when the only really over populated species is humans.

 

Kill us all!

[Phumfeinz]

Things that don't come with batteries. Imagine my disappointment when I finally got my long-awaited nasal hair trimmer, only to find out that 'batteries are sold separately'. 

[StefanAVFC]

The fact that there is a badger cull going on when the only really over populated species is humans.

Kill us all!

Nowt to do with overpopulation though.

[Eames]

Nowt to do with TB control either. 

 

Simply the Tories keeping their core supporters happy. Nothing more nothing less. Just a shame thousands of badgers have to die to secure the rural vote. 

[AVFC_Hitz]

Things that don't come with batteries. Imagine my disappointment when I finally got my  long awaited Anal destroyer, only to find out that 'batteries are sold separately'. 

 

Too easy.