villakram Posted October 6, 2017 Share Posted October 6, 2017 6 hours ago, chrisp65 said: Do you know that you can both defo make kids? Win win scenario could yet be that you're banging away for years, peppering her with blanks. Peppering is all well and good, but the perfect turkey requires some good stuffing too. It's putting pepper in the stuffing that has people all marmite. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 (edited) Im 35 next year snd the missus will be 34 this month. No kids yet. I would imagine its going to be very difficult for us to start a family in next couple years Edited October 7, 2017 by Demitri_C Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest av1 Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 (edited) 17 hours ago, rodders0223 said: Just get a vasectomy and don't tell her. I had a vasectomy a couple of weeks back. If there is anyone considering kids, or indeed a vasectomy, they are welcome to pop around my house. 10 minutes with my son should tip the balance in favour of the latter Joking aside i wouldn't swap it for the world. The only bit advice i would give anyone considering children, and i know this seems like stating the blooming obvious, is to be 100% sure (if there is such a thing) in you're relationship with you're partner. When my ex fell pregnant we had only been together for 9 months and in hindsight we were still in the honeymoon stage. We split up when he was 2 and it was the worst period of my life fighting to see him. Edited October 7, 2017 by av1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 I'm pleased how it worked out for me, my boy arrived when I was 28 and daughter at 30. No more now and when I'm 50 they'll both be pretty grown up and I should hopefully be young and wealthy enough to have a proper mid-life crisis. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted October 7, 2017 Share Posted October 7, 2017 29, 31 and had my third when I was 33. Had a few scares in my younger days with various one night stands, but luckily none ended up being mine. I think the latest I would of waited for kids would of been 40 at the very latest, and it would of have to have been with someone really special for me to bother then. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 8, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 8, 2017 On 06/10/2017 at 12:35, rjw63 said: This is the parents fault, not the kids. Back in the 80's and 90's we took our kids everywhere and the scenario you describe was a regular occurrence. it pissed me off, but the fact that my three sprogs sat at the table, and behaved, while other useless word removed parents let theirs run riot, made me feel superior. It's all down to shit parenting. I completely agree. Doesn't help me though. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 When I was taken restaurants/pub meals as a kid I was always well behaved... otherwise i'd get the wrath of my Dad! Nowadays some parents just don't give a shit I was in a pub earlier having breakfast. Screaming kids aplenty *sigh* On the subject of kids I don't think I'll ever have any. I'm 38 now and as times ticks on, i'm more anti children than ever. 10 years ago I was a 'maybe'. Now i'm practically a 'definitely not'. I'd rather not have the responsibility or the cost of them. Does that make me selfish? Perhaps, but then again I don't care what society thinks of me. I mean, it could change if I met someone but i'd be very surprised. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rugeley Villa Posted October 8, 2017 Share Posted October 8, 2017 18 minutes ago, Xela said: When I was taken restaurants/pub meals as a kid I was always well behaved... otherwise i'd get the wrath of my Dad! Nowadays some parents just don't give a shit I was in a pub earlier having breakfast. Screaming kids aplenty *sigh* On the subject of kids I don't think I'll ever have any. I'm 38 now and as times ticks on, i'm more anti children than ever. 10 years ago I was a 'maybe'. Now i'm practically a 'definitely not'. I'd rather not have the responsibility or the cost of them. Does that make me selfish? Perhaps, but then again I don't care what society thinks of me. I mean, it could change if I met someone but i'd be very surprised. If you don't want them then you dont want them. Nowt up with it, and I only don't get it because I now have kids. I didn't want them myself until I settled down in my late 20s. Pros and cons either way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 My head is a total mess at the moment. And it's not to do with the girl at work, that ship has sailed. I'm having serious second thoughts about my current relationship. Don't know what to do. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StefanAVFC Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 DHUTWU 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 Just now, StefanAVFC said: DHUTWU Thanks. Don't know what I was thinking. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StefanAVFC Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 If you don't know after that, you'll never know. In all seriousness, I had this thought a few times with my ex and eventually it became too much and I had to end it. Give it some time; if it isn't changing then you need to be honest with yourself and her, and end it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 I think I'm going to speak to her. Might leave it a week. I need to tell her, it's not fair. And the longer I wait the harder it'll be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 17 minutes ago, Stevo985 said: My head is a total mess at the moment. And it's not to do with the girl at work, that ship has sailed. I'm having serious second thoughts about my current relationship. Don't know what to do. Ask yourself this if you saw your current lady with another man how would you feel? Mad with jealousy/upsetting Would bother you but you would get over it Wouldnt bother you in slightest If its two of the latter then you may have to consider calling it quits Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 1 minute ago, Demitri_C said: Ask yourself this if you saw your current lady with another man how would you feel? Mad with jealousy/upsetting Would bother you but you would get over it Wouldnt bother you in slightest If its two of the latter then you may have to consider calling it quits Definitely not the first one. I'd be bothered, but I think I'd be more bothered by the deceit than the fact she was with someone else. In fact I think I'd be relieved because it would give me a reason to end it. ****. That's not right. Something's broken. I think I've known for a while. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lapal_fan Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 1 minute ago, Stevo985 said: Definitely not the first one. I'd be bothered, but I think I'd be more bothered by the deceit than the fact she was with someone else. In fact I think I'd be relieved because it would give me a reason to end it. ****. That's not right. Something's broken. I think I've known for a while. Seems like you already know brah. It's not nice, but "this too shall pass". 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 1 hour ago, Stevo985 said: My head is a total mess at the moment. And it's not to do with the girl at work, that ship has sailed. I'm having serious second thoughts about my current relationship. Don't know what to do. Sorry to hear that fella. Is it something that has broken down between you or is it just you feel trapped by being in a relationship? I only ask as I have ended relationships thinking it wasn't working and wanted my 'freedom' and regretted it afterwards as I realised it was just me being in a bit of a rut and thinking the grass would be greener. I hope that makes some sense! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 18 minutes ago, Xela said: Sorry to hear that fella. Is it something that has broken down between you or is it just you feel trapped by being in a relationship? I only ask as I have ended relationships thinking it wasn't working and wanted my 'freedom' and regretted it afterwards as I realised it was just me being in a bit of a rut and thinking the grass would be greener. I hope that makes some sense! It makes perfect sense. And the worry that it's exactly what you're describing me is what's probably stopping me doing it right now. The thought of breaking up makes me feel sick. But at the same time the thought of not breaking up doesn't feel right either. Ugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodders Posted October 13, 2017 Share Posted October 13, 2017 worth just having a whack of stevo time? Go away for a break just you for a week or so? I have "I wonder" moments myself, but whether that's an emotional claustrophobia, or part of the usual up and downs, who knows. Though the fact that other work girl had you thinking for a while may have got your mind re-figuring itself to "fresh options" for want of a much better way of saying it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted October 13, 2017 VT Supporter Share Posted October 13, 2017 37 minutes ago, Rodders said: worth just having a whack of stevo time? Go away for a break just you for a week or so? I have "I wonder" moments myself, but whether that's an emotional claustrophobia, or part of the usual up and downs, who knows. Though the fact that other work girl had you thinking for a while may have got your mind re-figuring itself to "fresh options" for want of a much better way of saying it. I've been away for a week with work. I'll see what it's like for a bit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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