Eames Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Well done mate. Must be rubbish. Still living together til 2012? Kudos. I couldn't do that. I would be out. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irreverentad Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Well done mate. Must be rubbish. Still living together til 2012? Kudos. I couldn't do that. I would be out. It is hard, but as I said we still get on well and there is no one else involved. The only problem I could forsee would be if anyone else came on the scene for either of us. Although we have both said neither of us want a relationship in the next 12 months...so we shall see. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Good to hear you're moving in the right direction. Living together for the foreseeable future is a little strange I must say, not sure I could make that work. It seems like your weight is an issue in your mind at least so glad its coming off and you should get more confident with the ladies as it does. My advice, get pissed with your mates and smash everything in sight for a while, once you've got that out of your system you can look for the 'one' again. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irreverentad Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Good to hear you're moving in the right direction. Living together for the foreseeable future is a little strange I must say, not sure I could make that work. It seems like your weight is an issue in your mind at least so glad its coming off and you should get more confident with the ladies as it does. My advice, get pissed with your mates and smash everything in sight for a while, once you've got that out of your system you can look for the 'one' again. Hi Tamuff, Cheers. The weight is not an issue for me but I do want to feel 'fit and healthy' again. I have found the gym to be a great place to get rid of frustration be it work or home stuff. Also I have started to play 5-a-side again. Not sure I am ready for physical or emotional relationships for a while yet and certainly fearful of the 'dating game'. Is the lack of desire not to 'smash' any women normal still at this point (3 weeks)? Anyone know when it might return? I must admit it has been a concern that I have had. cheers Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
zak Posted July 26, 2011 Share Posted July 26, 2011 Sounds like your progressing through this better than nearly everyone would, irreverentad! But you really got to stop living together as soon as possible, its just going to be difficult. Also from a financial point of view: I would want to sell the house as soon as possible, looks like its going to get harder and harder to sell a house. But thats for another thread. Ayway, keep on trucking towards that light and personally i woldnt worry about 'smashing' any women yet, i am sure itll come and you know women love trying to mend a broken heart, especially one thats just looking good from gyming it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodders Posted July 26, 2011 Author Share Posted July 26, 2011 as long as you keep yourself busy and occupied the house living thing isn;t that bad, - i did it for about 5 months and i was basically out most of the time with friends and activities which helped. and not trying to force through an immediate "aargh" where do i live now type scenario sounds emminently reasonable - there's enough on the plate as it is, though it will naturally be more difficult in a couple of months time as well i think after youve gotten a little more established in your new routine - but sounds like you're happy to do that so the best of luck! Glad to see you've taken positive steps - they really are a great way of changing the focus! and of course, I hardly think either of you will be looking for a relationship elsewhere soon - though it'll be odd still when conversations with mutual friends roll onto the subject I suppose, or if well meaning friends try to set you up! You've no need to be fearful, it'just take time, but when you're ready, you'll know! best of luck with it all! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b6bloke Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 Glad to hear you have grabbed the bull by the horns mate and really have to acknowledge you as you are handling this fantastic. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob182 Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 As B6 says! Good on you mate. There are a few different views on here regarding living together. I think, if it works for you then stick with it. The only problem will be if it stops.working and you then have a big panic and want to leave asap. Though neither of you want another relationship right now, or in the next 12 months, it could still happen and that's when things might get a bit awkward and painful. I wouldn't have a second thought about the desire to do any lady-smashing right now. That'll all be part and parcel of the healing process and I wouldn't expect anyone coming out of a long marriage to be perfectly comfortable with that idea too soon. Thats my 10 pence worth. Who knew VT actually had a sensitive side? I'm now off out to look at boobs, spit, hit something with a hammer and buy a multi-purpose remote control! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tomzep Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 Just watch out that when you start looking like arnie she'll be out to get you back!! Seriously though it sounds like your getting the first steps sorted and though there will be moments of pain or uncertainty, youll overcome it. Setting yourself short and medium term goals, like studying, is the key. Youve done a very wose thing there, stops you feeling like your drifting and gives you new purpose and direction. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
b6bloke Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 As Tom says beware those days of uncertainty and she will have these too, if she sees you moving forward as we do it will damage her esteem, its not your intention but a lot of women may begin to flirt to see if they get a reaction, if she gets it be prepared for rejection if you fall into it. This isnt her being malicious as she will more than likely be unaware that she is doing this but just because she ended it it does not mean that its going to be an easy ride for her either. Do you still have suspicions of there being someone else? If not then she needs to be comended for her honesty as so many people male and female go to the getting a back up lined up before finishing, or staying in a relationship where she is unhappy living a lie. I would rather be hurt by the truth rather than be protected by a lie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irreverentad Posted July 27, 2011 Share Posted July 27, 2011 As Tom says beware those days of uncertainty and she will have these too, if she sees you moving forward as we do it will damage her esteem, its not your intention but a lot of women may begin to flirt to see if they get a reaction, if she gets it be prepared for rejection if you fall into it. This isnt her being malicious as she will more than likely be unaware that she is doing this but just because she ended it it does not mean that its going to be an easy ride for her either. Do you still have suspicions of there being someone else? If not then she needs to be comended for her honesty as so many people male and female go to the getting a back up lined up before finishing, or staying in a relationship where she is unhappy living a lie. I would rather be hurt by the truth rather than be protected by a lie. Thanks everyone. I am just determined not to look back and keep going forward. B6, I am certain there is no-one else. To be fair she doesn't have the time! She said she was just sick of lying to me and was quite upset. But I am now only answerable to myself and that feels quite liberating!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MCU Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Sort of moving on from my 'Driving routes' thread I don't know why but I never fancy staying over at my girlfriends house. I'd rather she keep coming to mine so she does but I think her parents are getting a little cheesed with me now. They've met me and all that but I don't think it's fair her coming to me. That's why I suggested me picking her up instead of her paying £5 to get the train down all the while. Anyway, I don't know why but I've never particularly liked 'sleepovers' anyway. Just me? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 You don't enjoy doing the dirty to their daughter whilst they sleep in the other room? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MCU Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
irreverentad Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Does she qualify for 'concessions' on the train? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob182 Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Just go to hers Warnock! What's the fuss? It's more of a challenge when you have to be quiet and slow down (..any noises) when someone walks past in the corridoor! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC-Prideofbrum Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Are Warnock and Daz related? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MCU Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 Just go to hers Warnock! What's the fuss? It's more of a challenge when you have to be quiet and slow down (..any noises) when someone walks past in the corridoor! It's not actually that mate. I don't know what it is, I just like being in my own house I think. Are Warnock and Daz related? Nope, I'm 1 person. I like to mix it up a little. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparey16 Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 You don't enjoy doing the dirty to their daughter whilst they sleep in the other room? Had the pleasure of that experience last saturday, in a bungalow, risky sex is the best Bare in mind the girlfriend is quite a loud one, it was funny to watch her try and be ever so quiet. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob182 Posted July 29, 2011 Share Posted July 29, 2011 it was funny to watch her try and be ever so quiet. Yup! :nod: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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