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You're in a bar fight


Ikantcpell

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41 minutes ago, Dr_Pangloss said:

This is a very good shout, however I think Big Dunc was much more of a hard man off the pitch so for that reason he gets my nod. But always good to see Billy Whitehurst get mentioned as he is a genuine footballing psychopath who doesn't get talked about as much in this day and age.

I'm not sure that many people could match Whitehurst off the pitch, either!

 

Read me

 

Quote

I was playing for Oxford at the time. I had gone into a boozer and had got in a scrap; I’ve gone outside with this bloke, who had a couple of guys with him. I start fighting with this kid who I had been arguing with inside and basically I’ve put my thumb in his eye, smashed his head against the wall then his friend has pulled one of those coshes that you can extend and he’s smashed me over the nose with it. His other mate has hit me on the other side and as I have turned round he has hit me on the cheek. I’ve got a hole straight through my cheek near the side of my nose, my nose is all smashed up and I had 30-odd stitches in the back of my head. It looked horrendous: my nose was hanging off when it actually happened but then they stitched it back on.

 

Edit: He also used to have bare knuckle fights with gypsies for cash.  I saw him play for Hull a few times, he was actually a pretty decent player as well.

Edited by Risso
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Just now, BOF said:

Because you're aware of the context and the players involved.  If you had no idea who was who then you might think he's a meathead picking on a much smaller player.

Oh yeah, I get that. I can understand why he didn't like it, but if people are taking the time to send him the picture to get it signed, then they must have some kind of idea of the kind of man he was.

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I recall John Fashanu being interviewed and asked about his toughest opponents. He said Paul McGrath and Shaun Teale. Plus if you were already in a bar, you could have a couple of beers with them too. God will be on soft drinks, obviously.

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15 minutes ago, Ikantcpell said:

What if you were there with your girlfriend and someone walked up to her and started to grab her tits and kissing her,iam sure you would get into a bar fight then.

I wouldn't put myself in a place where that was likely to happen.

Also, my tits are way nicer than my wifes.

Also, what kind of stupid scenario is that?  :lol:  

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Some good choices so far. 

I'd go with Duncan Ferguson and Mick Hartford. 

If I needed someone a bit less rangy and for close combat then i'd go for Julien Dicks! 

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10 hours ago, lapal_fan said:

I've told you before about this.  If people "start on you", then just piss your pants and smile at them with cum face eyes. 

It's worked for me countless times. 

Somebody once booted me in the arse when I was waiting for a bus on a dark night in Sparkbrook. 

I turned and thought I knew him and said in a friendly voice "alright, how's it going?“ 

After a few minutes chatting it turned out he needed a couple of quid to put some petrol in his car, and I realised I had absolutely no idea who he was. I think he was trying to mug me but my friendly recognition totally threw him off kilter. 

I gave him 2 quid and we parted with a "see you around" 

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9 minutes ago, sidcow said:

Somebody once booted me in the arse when I was waiting for a bus on a dark night in Sparkbrook. 

I turned and thought I knew him and said in a friendly voice "alright, how's it going?“ 

After a few minutes chatting it turned out he needed a couple of quid to put some petrol in his car, and I realised I had absolutely no idea who he was. I think he was trying to mug me but my friendly recognition totally threw him off kilter. 

I gave him 2 quid and we parted with a "see you around" 

Good tactic! Always act more mental than them! 

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Definitely Duncan Ferguson. Didn't he recently beat the shit out of someone who he caught trying to rob his house? 

And Andy Gray, he would crack some politically incorrect jokes and come tooled up

 

IMG_20180323_213849538.jpg

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11 hours ago, Ikantcpell said:

What if you were there with your girlfriend and someone walked up to her and started to grab her tits and kissing her,iam sure you would get into a bar fight then.

No, his lawyer would quickly pay you $130,000 to go away and not mention it ever.

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11 hours ago, sidcow said:

Definitely Duncan Ferguson. Didn't he recently beat the shit out of someone who he caught trying to rob his house? 

And Andy Gray, he would crack some politically incorrect jokes and come tooled up

 

IMG_20180323_213849538.jpg

"When Carl Bishop smashed his way into a grand house on a leafy avenue in Formby, Merseyside, successfully evading the security system, he was delighted to find a bounty of champagne and whisky. But there was one 6ft 4in item of anti-burglary technology that he had reckoned without: the Everton striker Duncan Ferguson. Bishop tried to smash a bottle of vodka over the footballer's head, before feeling the full force of "Big Dunc's" fist in his face – the thief was confined to hospital for two days. It was the second attempted robbery that Ferguson had foiled in his home; two years earlier, in 2001, he had sat on a thief until the police arrived."

https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2009/oct/05/away-day-robberies-premiership-footballers

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The inbreds from small heath used to have some tasty players in the early/mid 80's; Mark Dennis, Noel Blake, Robert Hopkins, Mick Hartford etc

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