tonyh29 Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 ^^ thought it was the Tory party ? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted October 22, 2010 VT Supporter Share Posted October 22, 2010 What do you tell a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice.VT (rightly) bans posters for racist jokes, yet allows this shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villa4europe Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 ^^ thought it was the Tory party ? i thought it was hypothermia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 Firstly I neither condone nor encourage domestic abuse. But it's a joke thread, some jokes are a little risque, a lot of jokes make you wince. So why is that joke uber-offensive yet joking about grannies and hypothermia isn't? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted October 22, 2010 Share Posted October 22, 2010 Or for that matter, paedophilia? It's a joke, you need to lighten up a bit more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted October 22, 2010 VT Supporter Share Posted October 22, 2010 Firstly I neither condone nor encourage domestic abuse. But it's a joke thread, some jokes are a little risque, a lot of jokes make you wince. So why is that joke uber-offensive yet joking about grannies and hypothermia isn't?Dunno. Sorry, it just sickens me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted October 22, 2010 Moderator Share Posted October 22, 2010 I thought he took it out of Ireland's best selling book "Secrets to a successful marriage". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
andykeenan Posted October 27, 2010 Share Posted October 27, 2010 A woman was on the way to winning £100,000 on a game show, but her final question was suspended for the next night. Her husband sneaked into the studio and found the question and answer. He raced home and told his wife "Your question is 'What are the three main parts of the male anatomy', and the answer is 'The head, heart and penis.' The woman thinks about this throughout the night, but keeps forgetting the answer. Her husband keeps reminding her, "The head, heart and penis." Come the game show she has forgotten again, and the presenter asks, "For £100,000, what are the three main parts of the male anatomy? You have ten seconds." "Um... the head." "Good. Eight seconds." "Um... the heart." "That's right. Five seconds." "Oh... um... damn. My husband drilled it into me last night and I had it on the tip of my tongue this morning..." "That's close enough! You've won £100,000!" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 Paramedics attend a nasty accident involving a sports car. They see the driver screaming in pain and shout "Calm down sir, at least you haven't been flung out thru the windscreen like your girlfriend" The driver screams back "Have you seen what's in her mouth?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 I spent some time by the wife's grave today. She doesn't know... she thinks I'm digging a pond. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC-Prideofbrum Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 half joke, half observation.. "Halloween, the time when young kids come to your house for sweets and no questions are asked. perfect." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Qwpzxjor1 Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 Paramedics attend a nasty accident involving a sports car. They see the driver screaming in pain and shout "Calm down sir, at least you haven't been flung out thru the windscreen like your girlfriend" The driver screams back "Have you seen what's in her mouth?" Huh?.. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 Yeah I can't quite figure out the physics of that joke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC-Prideofbrum Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 I think the thing in the mouth is meant to be a cock...but not 100% sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparey16 Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 i got it...i pressume the joke is that she was giving the guy a blowjob...she got flung forward, guy screaming, cock been bit off...thats what i thought anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC-Prideofbrum Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 *holds back joke about you knowing about cock in mouth* sorry! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 Obviously she's giving him head in the car. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
CarewsEyebrowDesigner Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 Aye, but if she was in and around his walt, that would mean she is bent over at a fairly low angle in a fairly tight space, no? So if the car crashes, she is more than likely to be crushed by the steering wheel/dashboard rather than fly out the window...I don't quite know what kind of car crash would lead her to move vertically then out the window, and considering the man is in condition to talk afterwards when the paramedics arive, surely the crash wasn't that bad? Was there a great enough force to cause her to rip off his cock and send her out through the windscreen? If their was then he would have a considerable amount of damage too, not least because a major part of his body has been ripped off and he would bleed quite violently until the paramedics arrive leading to unconsciousness? Meh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted October 28, 2010 Share Posted October 28, 2010 It was a joke not a **** university essay Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts