JMilnereatsnails

Tell her you are sorry, but you've contracted an STI and she needs to go get herself tested as you don't know how long you've had it. That should get rid of her.

I look at my Wife and can't help but think that is this what I'm stuck with for the rest of (or at least the best part of ) my life? Then I look in the mirror and realise I've probably got the better end of the deal.

PUSSY!!!!!!

Old toys. Like my Tomytronic 3D driving game. I'm sure that thing damaged my eyesight. Or going to the shops and drooling over the Star Wars collection and forever wishing I got the Millenium Falcon. I never did get one, but it made it more fun to go round my spoilt cousins house and break his. My genuine awe at Street Fighter on the SNES.

That's John Carew!

I wanted to do another, albeit cheating

Following much enjoyment of this thread I felt compelled to add an effort! Uploaded with ImageShack.us

I have just discovered Memento Half Coated Fruit & Nut Cookies from Aldi. Whole pack in approx 7 minutes and now I feel sick.

Would you have to have an englishman as Northern Manager?

His lengthy goal drought will begin next week. Solely because I've just transfered him into my dreamteam.

The thread that keeps on giving. Amazing.

Ashley Young was a lot easier to defend against when he was at Villa. How many times did defenders double up against him, forcing him to ground or kicking lumps out of him? At Man Utd defenders can't commit two defenders onto him because it allows others too much space. The guy is class and deserves the plaudits coming his way and IMO he will only get better.

In the last two weeks I think I've made about 1000 transfers. Still not happy with my team

Emperor Thrash and Baron Grind sound like a barrel of laughs.

When people say "very true". How can something be very true? It's either true or it's not, simple. I've never heard of anything ever being a referred to as "a little bit true" so why say very true? What balls.

IT'S GROUNDHOG DAY!!!!!!!!!

People going on about Coffee forever and a day.....

I've just banged £50 on Ancelotti (3/1 Will Hills) next Manager so you can be pretty sure now that it won't happen....

Running around a Holiday Island with a machete. How current.

Words fail me. I have literally heard it all now.

I went to Benidorm a few years ago on a stag do, I can remember getting off the plane and the taxi ride to our hotel. The rest is a blur. I do remember a pub with a bucking bronco inside, which was great for 2 reasons. 1. Girls in short skirts fell off and showed their pants. 2. Sometimes the girls would double-up on the bull, smash their heads together and come off bleeding. You can't lose.

Was going to post that myself, found it **** hilaroious! I find it boring.

Mine is a first Gen machine, been sent back twice under warranty and got the 3 rings again. Spoke to Microsoft who said now it is out of warranty I'd have to pay £80 for a repair. Checked out youtube vids and bought a repair kit off ebay (approx £5), followed the youtube video instructions nd never had a problem since. Basically the heatsinks are removed from the motherboard and the clamps holding it on (the x clamp) is replaced with screws and washers, which allow the board to expand/contract under heat. I found the whole excersise quite thereputic, the dust and shit inside the xbox was a right mess and in the end I never had a problem since.

Well hopefully for you your scouts were there. You don't want to end up paying a ridiculous fee for a very average player from another club in a couple of years time, that you could have bought from us for half the price. Hopefully enough of your coaches were there. You don't want to let another very good player go for half the price you could have got. His starts:goals ratio was very good at Spurs, better than any of the strikers he had to compete with actually. His starts to goals ratio doesn't tell you much as it includes goals when coming off the bench. Minutes per goal is the best way to judge things and when they were all at Spurs together (which was only for a short time) both Defoe and Keane had better records than him. So often players (i'm not just talking about Bent, but in general) get judged on cumulative data and this really distorts things. You can only score when on the pitch so it's unfair to make comparisons by just looking at the amount of goals a player has scored, which is so often done. We are apparently trying to sign Suarez at the moment and our fans are excited by this as yours were over Bent. But I can tell by reading most of the comments on Spurs boards that hardly anyone has watched him, other than casually during the WC. I keep reading how fast, strong and clinical he is! I've seen a fair bit of Suarez and he's not fast, goes over easily and often has about 5 chances before he scores. Yet his stats say he's got an incredible record and he looks a bit like Tevez, so our fans seem to have decided he has Teves attributes and the clinical finishing of RVN (as they scored similar amounts in Holland). I genuinely think you're in for shock concerning Bent and we might well be if we sign Suarez. His starts to goals ratio doesn't tell you much, yet mins per goal does? Yet players who get judged on culmative data distort things? joey55 you are an idiot. The same culmative data refers to both sides of the argument from differing angles, does it not? What I'm saying is that is a player scores 10 goals in a season and starts 20 games, it suggest his goals to starts ratio is 1 in 2. But 5 of those goals could have been scored from the subs bench, so shouldn't be relevant in a goals to starts ratio. In reality he'd have a goals to starts ratio of 1 in 4. Hence a goals per minute ratio is better as it is a more accurate assesment of a players striker rate. Goals to starts give a distinct advantage to those players who spend more time on the pitch. I simply disagree. Because what you say is bollocks. If a player comes off the bench twice and scores 2 goals he has earnt the right to be in the starting 11, the fact that the player does not score in the games he starts should not make a difference to any starts per/ mins per total. Many differentials could be factored into this argument, (manager utilisation as an impact sub etc.) hence the reason it fails. All that matters is "how many (total) goals per season?" Who scores the most? Simple.