StefanAVFC Posted February 12, 2014 Share Posted February 12, 2014 (edited) Tarjei - with his cousin Vandaq - with his brother ^ Edited February 12, 2014 by StefanAVFC Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
myko Posted February 12, 2014 Share Posted February 12, 2014 If you want to really get into it, there's a great article by Lisa Bloom that was published in the Huffington Post entitled 'How to Talk to Little Girls'. (Because it starts from there.)http://www.huffingtonpost.com/lisa-bloom/how-to-talk-to-little-gir_b_882510.html *Opened link* *Read title* *Instantly felt like a pedo* *Closed down page* *Cleared history* 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morpheus Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 Can I ask in all seriousness the ladies on site (without any auntie jokes) after reading comments in the piss you off thread how can a bloke complement you on your appearance without offending? By doing it with sincerity and without an ulterior motive. Unfortunately, the latter especially, rarely exists. But how do you judge sincerity and how do you know that the person complimenting you just wants bed action and nothing else? Thinking back to when I was clubbing with my mates it was difficult enough to approach a girl without having to worry about showing sincerity. Telling someone that you find them attractive should be taken as a compliment or would you rather men not approach you at all? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 Jeremy Clarkson made a joke in Sunday's top gear that you'll get fired these days if you tell a female colleague that she looks nice today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 13, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted February 13, 2014 My personal rule in the workplace is "would you say it (or something very similar) to a male colleague" I might compliment a male colleague's clothes or shoes or something. I wouldn't tell him he looked attractive, so I shouldn't say that to a woman either. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morpheus Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 That's really my point TV. There's so much hogwash these days about what is acceptable and what isn't in how you approach people of the opposite sex. A man can't apparently tell a lady that's she's attractive but a women can use the same approach without causing offence. It's probably one of the reasons why dating sites have become so popular now that people find it more comfortable to use a keyboard than the personal touch in fear of offending someone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 13, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted February 13, 2014 My comments were regarding the workplace by the way. In more sociable situations it's obviously completely different (imo). Telling a girl she looks hot on a night out is completely fair game, and is usually a surprisingly effective opening line. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Morpheus Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 My personal rule in the workplace is "would you say it (or something very similar) to a male colleague" I might compliment a male colleague's clothes or shoes or something. I wouldn't tell him he looked attractive, so I shouldn't say that to a woman either. But there is a social barrier there already if you do mention to a colleague of the same gender that he looks attractive. What we're getting at is how to you tell someone of the opposite sex that he or she is attractive and what approach is acceptable either in the workplace or outside. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 13, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted February 13, 2014 You shouldn't tell a female colleague that she looks attractive in the workplace, imo. It's not professional. You can compliment them, but not on their looks. People will probably disagree but there you go. Outside the workplace is a completely different scenario. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 You shouldn't tell a female colleague that she looks attractive in the workplace, imo. It's not professional. You can compliment them, but not on their looks. People will probably disagree but there you go. Outside the workplace is a completely different scenario. At work = "Good morning" Outside of work "Damn girl, you looking fiiiiine" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 13, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted February 13, 2014 Pretty much 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Wainy316 Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 (edited) How are you meant to get the golden 'over the photo copier' shag if you can't even tell her she looks nice in the vicinity of said copier? Edited February 13, 2014 by Wainy316 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 13, 2014 VT Supporter Share Posted February 13, 2014 Shouldn't and wouldn't are two different things Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Frobisher Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 My limit is telling a female colleague their hair looks nice when they have quite obviously had a haircut. And when I know them well. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Genie Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 "opted for a thong today, nice" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFCLaura Posted February 13, 2014 Share Posted February 13, 2014 Can I ask in all seriousness the ladies on site (without any auntie jokes) after reading comments in the piss you off thread how can a bloke complement you on your appearance without offending? By doing it with sincerity and without an ulterior motive. Unfortunately, the latter especially, rarely exists. But how do you judge sincerity and how do you know that the person complimenting you just wants bed action and nothing else? Thinking back to when I was clubbing with my mates it was difficult enough to approach a girl without having to worry about showing sincerity. Telling someone that you find them attractive should be taken as a compliment or would you rather men not approach you at all? That's the thing about sincerity though, isn't it? You don't need to try being (or sounding) sincere, if you are, then you are. And it will be apparent to whoever you're talking to. Everyone likes being complimented, so don't let my comment put you off complimenting people. It's the people that do it purely for their own gain, in my case to sell me something, that really get my goat. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Spoony Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Ok so I've now had a few and am going to open up. I've been single for 3 years now and I'm tired of being single. I've slept around a bit (not loads) and I'm now ready to settle down but the problem is I don't feel like I meet anyone I want to settle with. Been on a few dates with girls I know that have been fine but nothing has come of it and I never seem to meet anyone outside of work where something will happen (if it's in a bar or something it's either just chat, might get with them or occasionally go home with them, but I never meet girls outside of a 'bar' sort of environment). As for work itself, I never really have the time to make anything happen as I'm now a lawyer in the City and it's just too highly charged all the time (plus you don't shit where you eat). So I don't really know what to do. Should I try online dating maybe? Or maybe I'm being too picky? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rodders Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 no harm in online dating at all. It's kind of odd, I view it as a default setting for me now. I just assume I'll go there to try and find someone. I certainly never expect to find anyone in a "normal" setting :/ With the occasional dates, how long do you give it before deciding no? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Baselayers Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Ok so I've now had a few and am going to open up. I've been single for 3 years now and I'm tired of being single. I've slept around a bit (not loads) and I'm now ready to settle down but the problem is I don't feel like I meet anyone I want to settle with. Been on a few dates with girls I know that have been fine but nothing has come of it and I never seem to meet anyone outside of work where something will happen (if it's in a bar or something it's either just chat, might get with them or occasionally go home with them, but I never meet girls outside of a 'bar' sort of environment). As for work itself, I never really have the time to make anything happen as I'm now a lawyer in the City and it's just too highly charged all the time (plus you don't shit where you eat). So I don't really know what to do. Should I try online dating maybe? Or maybe I'm being too picky? I'm 33 and I have never settled down. I suppose its because of my job. Then again the older you get the more crucial time becomes. Try the online dating thing I reckon dude Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
StefanAVFC Posted February 20, 2014 Share Posted February 20, 2014 Ok so I've now had a few and am going to open up. I've been single for 3 years now and I'm tired of being single. I've slept around a bit (not loads) and I'm now ready to settle down but the problem is I don't feel like I meet anyone I want to settle with. Been on a few dates with girls I know that have been fine but nothing has come of it and I never seem to meet anyone outside of work where something will happen (if it's in a bar or something it's either just chat, might get with them or occasionally go home with them, but I never meet girls outside of a 'bar' sort of environment). As for work itself, I never really have the time to make anything happen as I'm now a lawyer in the City and it's just too highly charged all the time (plus you don't shit where you eat). So I don't really know what to do. Should I try online dating maybe? Or maybe I'm being too picky? I'm in a very similar situation to you; maybe a year less down the line. I've been single for a year and I think having somebody would occupy my mind a bit and curb my anxiety. I'm with you on never meeting anybody new thing. Lets go speed dating together 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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