Ghost Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 For verification. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zatman Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 hahaha its brilliant. as good as ball in the groin from the simpsons Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 (edited) "Barney's movie had heart, but Football in the Groin had a football in the groin!" Back on-topic, the local rag has seen fit once more to grace itself with my name following last Sunday's footballing antics; in the freezing feckin' snow, with 10 men (some of our lazier **** didn't bother turning up, then the damn match went ahead despite the weather as apparently we were on a privately-owned pitch... why that matters when you're mid-tundra I don't know, but apparently it does ) we overturned one of the league's better (for "better" read "likes to play football as opposed to just kicking you") teams 2-1 with some Herculean performances, including my temporary possession by the spirit of Bozzie (post-putting the weight on, but pre-losing all the ability). Curiously, I've yet to be stopped for my autograph outside of the local kebab house though. Edited February 28, 2013 by GarethRDR 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 Ah, I had a newspaper thing about me last year, it felt good. "Ben Stephenson breaks hearts" was the headline. In fact, let me find it... ...here it is I'm yet to visit Coventry Town Centre since then, but I'm sure I'll be mobbed, Beatle mania style, when I do 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 I always thought your name was Steven O'985. Kind of like some Irish grime artist . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 That's my stage name Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 ...here it is Glorious stuff. Alas, our Gazette's writers aren't anywhere near as poetic. Felt bad for the other goalkeeper though, our equaliser came just before half-time and it was an absolute 'mare on his part; he was a bit of a big 'un (and I mean proper wobbly) and one of our lads pumped a speculative shot in from about 40-45 yards out, just to test him. By the time the ball reached him, it'd dropped and bounced by his feet and he committed the cardinal sin that 'keepers who don't like collapsing are prone to which is try and control it with his feet. Now it's bad enough doing that on a decent surface, as I mentioned the pitch was basically frozen so the bounces were going fast and they were going high. Ball comes off the surface, hits his shin, rolls through his legs and tamely into the back of the net. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 As a memeber of the goalkeepers union myself I can sympathise . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 To be fair to him, if he had collapsed on the ball he'd have likely dropped straight through the Earth's crust so I can at least understand his reluctance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 I don't sympathise with him. I scored our goal of the season* last year through a similar mistake, so I'm all for it. *I feel it was given to me ironically. Ok it was scored from about 90 yards, but I'd hardly call it a screamer. The guy on our team who scored a 30 yard half volley off the bar to win a game for us in the 89th minute felt justifiably hard done by Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 90 yards?! Foot like a traction engine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 It bounced.... once and over the keeper's head But yeah, it was with one of these Ridiculous ball. Let's just say they stay hit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 'kin hell, I'm happy if I get my kicks over the half-way line. Mind you, the budget that the almighty Basingstoke & District Sunday League have set aside for footballs just about stretches to cover one slightly-rounded and sanded down slab of rock per game. After a few weeks of punting I can usually peel the entirety of a newly formed callus from the top of my foot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brumerican Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 You need to start giving it short to your fullbacks Barcelona style Gaz . Big hoofs are out man . Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Ah that's far too progressive, plus it would require me to have some degree of control over my distribution. My footwork (or lack thereof) resulted in a near-miss in one game, I came out of the box to dribble a loose ball back in and gather it up, saw an attacker bearing down on me, hastily attempted a Cruyff turn and fell flat on my arse. Barely recovered in time. Haven't had my CB's pass back to me since. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ME Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Showed up at work and the boss had Frank Sinatra on while cleaning. So I mopped and danced for the first 30 minutes of my work day. And it did very much cheer me up!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Stevo985 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 If I gave the ball to my fullbacks I'd probably be picking it out of my net a few seconds later. They're both shit. I have a rather huge punt (insert innuendo joke here... *chuckle* Insert). Off the ground my kicking is shit, but out of my hands I can launch it, so I can rely on the act half the people who play sunday league are scared to head the ball. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Designer1 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 (edited) Seeing the avatar that ME has, and remembering some of the lines and scenes from that movie. That cheers me up. Must watch it again soon. Slice of genius. Edited February 28, 2013 by Designer1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted February 28, 2013 Share Posted February 28, 2013 Damn your eyes! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Designer1 Posted February 28, 2013 VT Supporter Share Posted February 28, 2013 Too late! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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