Judge Mental's Sexism and Misogyny Topic

[chrisp65]

19 minutes ago, tonyh29 said:

I believe I’m the only one who’s mentioned banter down the pub so I think I’m safe to assume this is aimed at me even if you didn’t directly quote me.

I could have dodged the subject but gave a truthful response and went to great lengths to say the context in which it’s used …yet somehow you’ve decided to ignore most of what I said and equate this to comparing me to Donald Trump 

Your’e just a bloke on an internet forum who doesn’t really know me so ultimately I guess it matters not if you “buy it “ or not but for the record I’ve never used phrases like grab them by the pussy and would never mistreat women,  or anyone elsefor that matter .. nor would my mates either fwiw.

as for your friends , no offence intended but from previous discussions you’re in a kinda weird bubble , everyone reads the guardian, everyone voted remain , none of them have ever smiled at a Tory etc , given the choice I think I’d rather have a night out with my more flawed mates , it’s sounds like it would be much more fun  

 

To be fair to Tony when we met up, it was him that microwaved me a cup of coffee whilst his better half just sort of wandered around and did her own thing.

It was a good ten minutes of checking out the window that she’d really left before he turned in to the sexist bastard we all know and love.

 

My mammary isn’t great at the best of times, but I’m pretty sure this board used to have a ‘baps not flaps’ rule, so it is getting better. 

 

[LondonLax]

57 minutes ago, tonyh29 said:

I believe I’m the only one who’s mentioned banter down the pub so I think I’m safe to assume this is aimed at me even if you didn’t directly quote me.

I could have dodged the subject but gave a truthful response and went to great lengths to say the context in which it’s used …yet somehow you’ve decided to ignore most of what I said and equate this to comparing me to Donald Trump 

Your’e just a bloke on an internet forum who doesn’t really know me so ultimately I guess it matters not if you “buy it “ or not but for the record I’ve never used phrases like grab them by the pussy and would never mistreat women,  or anyone elsefor that matter .. nor would my mates either fwiw.

as for your friends , no offence intended but from previous discussions you’re in a kinda weird bubble , everyone reads the guardian, everyone voted remain , none of them have ever smiled at a Tory etc , given the choice I think I’d rather have a night out with my more flawed mates , it’s sounds like it would be much more fun  

 

I was also getting Trump vibes from your post if that helps

Might be a generational thing. 

Edited July 21, 2023 by LondonLax

[Xela]

2 hours ago, sharkyvilla said:

Do women use internet message boards much in general?  I've always thought of it as a nerdy bloke thing.

I think most hobbies are to be fair. I'd class posting on forums as a hobby/interest. Look at train spotting, plane spotting, steam rallies, classic car shows, historical reenactments, real ale quaffing, metal detecting, etc, it is all male dominated usually, as is most sport. I think men need a distraction from real life. Women are more focused on real life stuff I think. 

This forum is quite progressive but it can be laddish at times and fall into a Zoo/Nuts/Loaded type banter, but its few and far between and I think always said in a tongue in cheek way, and between posters who are comfortable with each other. I don't think there is an issue with sexism and misogyny on here. IMO of course. 

Edited July 21, 2023 by Xela

[sidcow]

4 hours ago, tomav84 said:

DHUTWU is a villatalk joke that everyone on here knows is not to be taken literally. 

 

[sidcow]

2 hours ago, sharkyvilla said:

Do women use internet message boards much in general?  I've always thought of it as a nerdy bloke thing.

My wife spends a lot of time on something called "only fans". 

She seems to make quite a bit of money on it as well, she tells me she has a good eye for buying and selling those hand held folding fans. They're very collectable apparently. Some people pay her a ton of money for them.  Need a strong wrist though when it gets hot. 

[mjmooney]

1 hour ago, tonyh29 said:

as for your friends , no offence intended but from previous discussions you’re in a kinda weird bubble , everyone reads the guardian, everyone voted remain , none of them have ever smiled at a Tory etc , given the choice I think I’d rather have a night out with my more flawed mates , it’s sounds like it would be much more fun  

It might for you, it wouldn't be for me. 

And I don't consider my bubble any more weird than yours. 

[legov]

35 minutes ago, Xela said:

I think most hobbies are to be fair. I'd class posting on forums as a hobby/interest. Look at train spotting, plane spotting, steam rallies, classic car shows, historical reenactments, real ale quaffing, metal detecting, etc, it is all male dominated usually, as is most sport. I think men need a distraction from real life. Women are more focused on real life stuff I think. 

This forum is quite progressive but it can be laddish at times and fall into a Zoo/Nuts/Loaded type banter, but its few and far between and I think always said in a tongue in cheek way, and between posters who are comfortable with each other. I don't think there is an issue with sexism and misogyny on here. IMO of course. 

You really need to make a few more female friends...

[Xela]

6 minutes ago, legov said:

You really need to make a few more female friends...

I haven't got the energy or patience for any more! 

Edited July 21, 2023 by Xela

[foreveryoung]

This thread??

Must be right boring night down the pub with the lads with some on here, especially if you can't even have 'the banter' anymore.

If we follow the rules of some on VT, how the hell are people able to meet women now?  I' mean you can't look at a women your attracted to and tell your pals, she fit and would **** her. Or would we now have to say to our pals, "I think I'm going over to ask that lady if she wants to talk with me, before I say anything behind her back"? 

I go out with the lads have a laugh, banter, don't offend anyone. But if people think these days you can only sit in the corner with the lads, talk football, TV, an politics you must be 90s tripping!

As has been said good or bad, there's some on here stuck in a some weird bubbles, that I, an many others,  never want to enter.

[rjw63]

2 minutes ago, foreveryoung said:

This thread??

Must be right boring night down the pub with the lads with some on here, especially if you can't even have 'the banter' anymore.

If we follow the rules of some on VT, how the hell are people able to meet women now?  I' mean you can't look at a women your attracted to and tell your pals, she fit and would **** her. Or would we now have to say to our pals, "I think I'm going over to ask that lady if she wants to talk with me, before I say anything behind her back"? 

I go out with the lads have a laugh, banter, don't offend anyone. But if people think these days you can only sit in the corner with the lads, talk football, TV, an politics you must be 90s tripping!

As has been said good or bad, there's some on here stuck in a some weird bubbles, that I, an many others,  never want to enter.

[foreveryoung]

1 minute ago, rjw63 said:

Don't worry I got your back. 

[lapal_fan]

16 minutes ago, foreveryoung said:

This thread??

Must be right boring night down the pub with the lads with some on here, especially if you can't even have 'the banter' anymore.

If we follow the rules of some on VT, how the hell are people able to meet women now?  I' mean you can't look at a women your attracted to and tell your pals, she fit and would **** her. Or would we now have to say to our pals, "I think I'm going over to ask that lady if she wants to talk with me, before I say anything behind her back"? 

I go out with the lads have a laugh, banter, don't offend anyone. But if people think these days you can only sit in the corner with the lads, talk football, TV, an politics you must be 90s tripping!

As has been said good or bad, there's some on here stuck in a some weird bubbles, that I, an many others,  never want to enter.

To be honest, you try and come across as something of a "jack the lad" type.  The type that loves Ibiza and going a bit mental, probably get a bit too drunk and at some point, the cock/arse comes out.

But to me, that's shit, low level "banter".  It's rugby boy banter.  It's public school boy banter.  The banter that people like that think is cool, but just comes across as cringeworthy and sad.  It's a bit "main character", a bit "haha! Look at this lads, I'm MAD!"

And to me, that's everything David Brent or Jay from the Inbetweeners represent.  

I'm sure I'm amazingly wrong, but there you go, aren't we all?

This forum used to be more laddish, but it's also a forum with a core of users, who have been here since 2004-2008.  That's a long time ago.  And if you're acting like you did 19 years ago, you probably are more like those characters I mentioned than you'd like to think.

I'm an absolute dickhead on here. I post things about posters I'd never dream of saying in real life, because I'd get hit in the teeth.  But it's fun.

[rjw63]

6 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

 

I'm an absolute dickhead on here. I post things about posters I'd never dream of saying in real life, because I'd get hit in the teeth.  

With a lump hammer

[markavfc40]

31 minutes ago, foreveryoung said:

This thread??

Must be right boring night down the pub with the lads with some on here, especially if you can't even have 'the banter' anymore.......

I don't think that the point of this thread was what people say amongst their friends. It is about some of the language used on this site as a whole and whether it is sexist/misogynistic. 

I think some of us see this as a male only site or certainly forget sometimes that there will be females on here. I'm probably guilty of that.  

The game has moved on from when I first started going where the crowd was probably 95%+ male attendance. I have read that females now make up 30%. You'd think a popular fan forum like this would reflect the change in demographic but it doesn't come close as I'd imagine that no more than 1% of VT members are female. Whether that is because women have no interest in a forum like this or would be interested, certainly in the Villa related side, but just don't find it welcoming I'm not sure. 

I have two daughters aged 25 and 17. Both have been season ticket holders for years and are massive Villa fans. I wouldn't for a second encourage them to come on here though as I don't think it is a female friendly environment as there is casual sexism and I don't think they'd enjoy it. I think they'd have an expectation it would be male dominated anyway though so wouldn't even try it. I might ask them actually. 

[lapal_fan]

Just now, rjw63 said:

With a lump hammer

Haha, yea. 

 

[foreveryoung]

6 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

To be honest, you try and come across as something of a "jack the lad" type.  The type that loves Ibiza and going a bit mental, probably get a bit too drunk and at some point, the cock/arse comes out.

But to me, that's shit, low level "banter".  It's rugby boy banter.  It's public school boy banter.  The banter that people like that think is cool, but just comes across as cringeworthy and sad.  It's a bit "main character", a bit "haha! Look at this lads, I'm MAD!"

And to me, that's everything David Brent or Jay from the Inbetweeners represent.  

I'm sure I'm amazingly wrong, but there you go, aren't we all?

This forum used to be more laddish, but it's also a forum with a core of users, who have been here since 2004-2008.  That's a long time ago.  And if you're acting like you did 19 years ago, you probably are more like those characters I mentioned than you'd like to think.

I'm an absolute dickhead on here. I post things about posters I'd never dream of saying in real life, because I'd get hit in the teeth.  But it's fun.

Yes your amazingly wrong., I mean most of us don't say that anymore, generally cause we are either married or have a partner, but there is no doubt in the banter, we would still, shall we say appreciate, if a women in the pub was hot.

As for the core of users, you right, but there's also many who don't reply on subjects like this as they may have seen how posters with differing opinions get lambasted, or most likely they have just pressed ignore.

[foreveryoung]

2 minutes ago, markavfc40 said:

I don't think that the point of this thread was what people say amongst their friends. It is about some of the language used on this site as a whole and whether it is sexist/misogynistic. 

I think some of us see this as a male only site or certainly forget sometimes that there will be females on here. I'm probably guilty of that.  

The game has moved on from when I first started going where the crowd was probably 95%+ male attendance. I have read that females now make up 30%. You'd think a popular fan forum like this would reflect the change in demographic but it doesn't come close as I'd imagine that no more than 1% of VT members are female. Whether that is because women have no interest in a forum like this or would be interested, certainly in the Villa related side, but just don't find it welcoming I'm not sure. 

I have two daughters aged 25 and 17. Both have been season ticket holders for years and are massive Villa fans. I wouldn't for a second encourage them to come on here though as I don't think it is a female friendly environment as there is casual sexism and I don't think they'd enjoy it. I think they'd have an expectation it would be male dominated anyway though so wouldn't even try it. I might ask them actually. 

Women and girls are tougher than you think chap. Most ain't gonna be offended and hide in a corner cause some randoms on a forum has said Leimann is super hot and they definately would.

 

[lapal_fan]

Just now, foreveryoung said:

Yes your amazingly wrong., I mean most of us don't say that anymore, generally cause we are either married or have a partner, but there is no doubt in the banter, we would still, shall we say appreciate, if a women in the pub was hot.

As for the core of users, you right, but there's also many who don't reply on subjects like this as they may have seen how posters with differing opinions get lambasted, or most likely they have just pressed ignore.

You do get a fair bit of stick, yea. 

But it's been explained to you several times as to why posters tend to jump on you, so me adding more won't really help you.

You do have different opinions to a few posters, but you also share some with others.

You'd probably get more agreement out of the main forum, who I think you probably share a certain personality type with.

But I think mostly it's because people get frustrated that you often say the opposite of something, but when asked you don't always present an answer.  So people go a bit harder at you, which you then kinda "bat off" and call people out for wokeness or whatever.

It's difficult, but I don't think you'll ever really get why people are why they are with you and that's no dig, it's just one of those things.

It's weird that the only thing that connects 99% of us is the sports team we support, maybe that should be the focus for us.

[sidcow]

22 minutes ago, lapal_fan said:

I'm an absolute dickhead on here. 

 

 

 

[foreveryoung]

1 minute ago, lapal_fan said:

You do get a fair bit of stick, yea. 

But it's been explained to you several times as to why posters tend to jump on you, so me adding more won't really help you.

You do have different opinions to a few posters, but you also share some with others.

You'd probably get more agreement out of the main forum, who I think you probably share a certain personality type with.

But I think mostly it's because people get frustrated that you often say the opposite of something, but when asked you don't always present an answer.  So people go a bit harder at you, which you then kinda "bat off" and call people out for wokeness or whatever.

It's difficult, but I don't think you'll ever really get why people are why they are with you and that's no dig, it's just one of those things.

It's weird that the only thing that connects 99% of us is the sports team we support, maybe that should be the focus for us.

I get it personally, I understand people are different and have different views, it's just some don't  accept that on here, an they expect you to subscribe to there view, or your a racist, sexist (add others here) dickhead, an it's far from the truth. I'm no extremist on some topics, like some come across, but I do believe in that motto, live and let live, which unfortunately doesn't include me saying its right for Sam Smith to dress in a women's basque, with his belly hanging out, in front of a crowd of teenage kids.

But like has been said, they are just randoms on a forum, so to judge  would be wrong.