Chindie Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 4 minutes ago, choffer said: I can understand your reaction Chindie but I don't think it's particularly helpful. We've come a long way in understanding mental health issues in the last few years but not everyone is caught up yet. It's incumbent on all of us (particularly those who have an insight into how painful it is) to help others understand the complexities of the subject and I'm not convinced responding with a roley eye gif (or similar) does that. That's all well and good but as someone struggling a little at the moment, I'm not going to not react to such condescending shit. It doesn't help. It pisses off people that are struggling, and possibly makes it worse for people who might be but haven't sought help, by making it seem like their issue is just personal weakness they need to get over. Claptrap. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tom_avfc Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 5 minutes ago, Chindie said: That's all well and good but as someone struggling a little at the moment, I'm not going to not react to such condescending shit. It doesn't help. It pisses off people that are struggling, and possibly makes it worse for people who might be but haven't sought help, by making it seem like their issue is just personal weakness they need to get over. Claptrap. Completely agree with this. I think telling people that "having the strength to be happy" is the way to deal with a mental health issue is a dangerous attitude to have. I actually struggle to believe anybody still feels this way - I thought the discussion had moved on from such an outdated viewpoint. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Designer1 Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 Just now, tom_avfc said: I thought the discussion had moved on from such an outdated viewpoint. That's exactly the reason my first reaction was a 'bloody hell! Really?' type reaction. Always saddens me to see that sort of outdated thinking is still around. Much more education still required it seems. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 It's bit like telling somebody who has no willpower to use willpower to get willpower. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BillyShears Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 I think he might be saying that when you get through it you feel strong. I dunno, but my reaction was similar to those expressed. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lapal_fan Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 3 hours ago, Chindie said: That's all well and good but as someone struggling a little at the moment, I'm not going to not react to such condescending shit. It doesn't help. It pisses off people that are struggling, and possibly makes it worse for people who might be but haven't sought help, by making it seem like their issue is just personal weakness they need to get over. Claptrap. Some people who suffer with depression might get worse being on tablets, because they feel as though they've lost and "oh shit, I'm actually depressed". Everyone needs to be treated individually and what works for you, won't work for others. Some people need to be told "you know what? there's a lot of good stuff going on, you just need to look up and see". And it' worked for a couple of people I know. Now they feel great because they didn't have to take tablets, in order to get out of a depression. I have no idea how badly they suffered, but it's almost a parental thing to do, is to say "everything is okay, try and look at it this way". I don't think what @Demitri_C said is bad at all. So I think your sharpness is frankly unwarranted. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 5 hours ago, Chindie said: Having the strength to be happy? Christ. Chill will you what a over reaction 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 (edited) 41 minutes ago, lapal_fan said: Some people who suffer with depression might get worse being on tablets, because they feel as though they've lost and "oh shit, I'm actually depressed". Everyone needs to be treated individually and what works for you, won't work for others. Some people need to be told "you know what? there's a lot of good stuff going on, you just need to look up and see". And it' worked for a couple of people I know. Now they feel great because they didn't have to take tablets, in order to get out of a depression. I have no idea how badly they suffered, but it's almost a parental thing to do, is to say "everything is okay, try and look at it this way". I don't think what @Demitri_C said is bad at all. So I think your sharpness is frankly unwarranted. This is the problem sometimes with forums, someone sees this way the other just sees it as something different. It wasn’t meant to be condescending in the slightest The anger was totally unnecessary I was just sharing a experience of people I know who had the issue and what helps them. I didn’t say for anyone to do this. I even said everyone is different. When you get jumped on for having an opinion it makes you just want to not bother posting or even enter the thread anymore. and I would agree with your post it’s well said and that’s what I was sort of trying to say (badly it seems) Edited February 22, 2018 by Demitri_C 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xela Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 (edited) 5 hours ago, Chindie said: Having the strength to be happy? Christ. He won't help you edit: Didn't mean it to sound as bad as it looked written down at first. Edited February 22, 2018 by Xela 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 4 hours ago, tom_avfc said: Completely agree with this. I think telling people that "having the strength to be happy" is the way to deal with a mental health issue is a dangerous attitude to have. I actually struggle to believe anybody still feels this way - I thought the discussion had moved on from such an outdated viewpoint. Didn’t say that tom Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chindie Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 7 minutes ago, Xela said: He won't help you edit: Didn't mean it to sound as bad as it looked written down at first. He certainly wouldn't. He didn't exist. And if he did I don't think I'd be top of his list to help 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blandy Posted February 22, 2018 Moderator Share Posted February 22, 2018 12 minutes ago, Demitri_C said: This is the problem sometimes with forums, someone sees this way the other just sees it as something different. It wasn’t meant to be condescending in the slightest The anger was totally unnecessary I was just sharing a experience of people I know who had the issue and what helps them. I didn’t say for anyone to do this. I even said everyone is different. When you get jumped on for having an opinion it makes you just want to not bother posting or even enter the thread anymore. and I would agree with your post it’s well said and that’s what I was sort of trying to say (badly it seems) Totally agree Dem. Sometimes people see something that isn't there. I took your posts to show firstly some level of familiarity with people who've had some illness, some experience of drugs not being effective in every case and some further experience that for some people, for whom the drugs weren't effective, they were helped by, for that unique subset of the total, by being fortunate enough to have a particular outlook/strength and fortune with good things going on in their lives which aided them. And that you specifically said everyone is different. Then you got a reaction not to what was actually written, but to an unrepresentative subset taken out of context. (sorry that was more than 140 characters). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chindie Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 (edited) And I and seemingly quite a few other people didn't take it like that. I don't see much to take it as either beyond what it says. I feel quite justified in astonishment at it. Edited February 22, 2018 by Chindie 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Designer1 Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 32 minutes ago, Demitri_C said: Chill will you what a over reaction No it wasn't. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blandy Posted February 22, 2018 Moderator Share Posted February 22, 2018 3 minutes ago, Chindie said: And I and seemingly quite a few other people didn't take it like that. I don't see much to take it as either beyond what it says. I feel quite justified in astonishment at it. My point exactly. People can see things on the internet in ways they weren't intended to be taken and weren't meant. Now that could be me, who's got it wrong, though.... But I'm not trying to fall out and wish you well, Chindie. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
blandy Posted February 22, 2018 Moderator Share Posted February 22, 2018 1 minute ago, Designer1 said: No it wasn't. It wouldn't be an over-reaction if he'd said/meant what people thought he was saying...but he didn't say/mean that thing. Very internet. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vive_La_Villa Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 25 minutes ago, Chindie said: He certainly wouldn't. He didn't exist. And if he did I don't think I'd be top of his list to help He didn't exist? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vive_La_Villa Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 Talking of anti depressants. I've been on a certain type for years and my weight has ballooned. I hate it. But I'd rather be over weight than depressed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chindie Posted February 22, 2018 VT Supporter Share Posted February 22, 2018 Not for this topic. This topic is for finding the strength to be happy. 1 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Demitri_C Posted February 22, 2018 Share Posted February 22, 2018 3 minutes ago, Designer1 said: No it wasn't. It was, and the tone of posts after were very aggressive and uncalled for. It felt like I am not allowed an opinion or allowed to share s experience as I have not experienced that. It would have been more helpful if I was asked to clarify my posts than to be jumped on. Chindie I would like to just clear the air and just say it was not meant to be offensive or condescending in the slightest. The objective of my post to share a experience of those who I know dealt with their experience. lets talk next time, not jump or turn on each other as I think your a great poster on here 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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