SIFF World Cup

[Stevo985]

Ladies and Gents, this is the official thread of the Stevo Interspecies Football Federation World Cup.

For those who haven't followed in "General Chat", I posed the question of which animal would have the best football team if you put a human brain into them (i.e. we assumed they were of the same intelligence as the human team), and would the best one beat an equivalent team of humans?

And I'm taking it so seriously that we're having a thread for it where we will eventually determine a winner.

The rules:

16 entrants entered into a random draw (a straight knockout bracket) determined by an online generator.
8 teams seeded (see below) to avoid first round eliminations of favourites.
The winner of each "match" will be determined by a poll on this thread following what I'm sure will be totally logical and reasoned debate.
Polls will be started the night before or the morning of the game, and will continue until at least midday on the day of the game.
You can volunteer to be a team "manager"
An imaginary match report will follow, just for fun.
For the basis of debate, physical attributes are the only thing being considered. We are assuming that "intelligence" doesn't come into it. It's a level playing field brain wise.
The rules of football remain the same. i.e. the fact that a chimp could rip your face off and eat it is all well and good, but it's not going to be allowed on the pitch.
The only tweak to the rules is that for four legged animals their front legs are considered "arms", so they can only use their rear legs. Birds wings are considered their hands.
The SIFF President (me) has the final decision on all matters. We pride ourselves in being only slightly less corrupt than FIFA.

Entrants have already been determined (Seeds in brackets, in no particular order just to keep them separate in the first round draw) :

Chimps (1)
Gorillas (2)
Humans (3)
Kodiak Bears (4)
Kangaroos (5)
Albatrosses (6)
Ostriches (7)
Cheetahs (8)
Dolphins
Elephants
Pandas
Honey Badgers
Zebras
Baboons
Dogs
Polar Bears

Draw below:

Edited August 24, 2014 by Stevo985

[Stevo985]

Team managers:

Chimps - 8Pints

Ostriches - Rob182

Pandas - AVFCforever1991

Kangaroos - ArteSuave

Gorillas - Seat68

Honeybadgers - Shillz

Cheetahs - Wainy316

Baboons - Xela

Elephants - Ghost

Dogs - Maqroll

Kodiak Bears - Folski

Humans - Stefan Low

Edited August 15, 2014 by Stevo985

[ArteSuave]

I'll have kangaroos unless packo wants them.

[useless]

Can four legged animals stand on their hind legs? Otherwise it's going to be really awkard for them being only allowed to use their back legs.

[AVFCforever1991]

I'll take Pandas, not because they are going to win. Just because Pandas are great.

 

[Stevo985]

Can four legged animals stand on their hind legs? Otherwise it's going to be really awkard for them being only allowed to use their back legs.

Yeah of course they can. Depends if they're physically able.

[Seat68]

I would like gorillas please.

[Shillzz]

Bagsy Honey Badgers.

[Rob182]

As the manager of the Ostrich Team, I'd like to let you all know that we've been training for months, working on our 3-5-2 formation with flying (not literally) wing-backs.

Our goalkeeper has been working especially hard at improving his Jumping stat, as his arm-like-neck can only reach so far.

(Also, Stevo, the Team Manager list needs updating. Arte Suave is no longer my co-manager, as we had a disagreement over what colour strip to wear, and now we are arch enemies.

For those of you that are interested, the Ostrich Team will be dressed head-to-toe in electric pink).

[useless]

This reminds me of the Animalympics.

[hogso]

Dolphins be shit on land, yo

 

Can you put in some more and include mythical creatures plz

[Stevo985]

Dolphins be shit on land, yo

 

Can you put in some more and include mythical creatures plz

Dolphins are certainly at a disadvantage.

 

No mythical creatures. That would just be silly

[a m ole]

Based on not being able to lose a match if the other team can't score, Blue Whale.

[Stevo985]

Interesting shout.

However entries are closed. Sorry. They'll be considered in 4 years time.

 

Not physically being able to fit all 11 players on the pitch may disqualify them

[mjmooney]

As the manager of the Ostrich Team, I'd like to let you all know that we've been training for months, working on our 3-5-2 formation with flying (not literally) wing-backs.

Our goalkeeper has been working especially hard at improving his Jumping stat, as his arm-like-neck can only reach so far.

(Also, Stevo, the Team Manager list needs updating. Arte Suave is no longer my co-manager, as we had a disagreement over what colour strip to wear, and now we are arch enemies.

For those of you that are interested, the Ostrich Team will be dressed head-to-toe in electric pink).

As a lifelong 'Striches fan, I want to say how digusted I am by this decision. This is typical of the modern game's disrespect for tradition. As long as I can remember the team has played in black and white. I for one will not be renewing my season ticket, and I certainly won't be buying any replica shirts as long as the club goes on burying its head in the sand in the face of fans' opinions.

Yours disgustedly,

Black and White and not pink shite.

[Shillzz]

Go Team!

 

Edited August 11, 2014 by Shillzz

[Rob182]

As a lifelong 'Striches fan, I want to say how digusted I am by this decision. This is typical of the modern game's disrespect for tradition. As long as I can remember the team has played in black and white. I for one will not be renewing my season ticket, and I certainly won't be buying any replica shirts as long as the club goes on burying its head in the sand in the face of fans' opinions.

Yours disgustedly,

Black and White and not pink shite.

We (The Ostrich Team) would like to acknowledge your concerns, and also ensure you that this decision was made with the Team's best interests in mind.

Although some of the fans will find it difficult to accept our new strip, with it's resemblance to that of our bitter rivals, The Flamingos, we believe that the new colour-scheme goes hand-in-hand with our plan to market the Ostriches as a team who have a 'Bright Future'.

(If you think this is bad, you should have seen our former co-manager's suggestion!)

We hope that you will get behind the team in this upcoming campaign.

Any complaints can be forwarded to Nicky.Keye@OstrichTeam.com.

[Folski]

Elephants could be one that cause an upset and go a long way. 

[Folski]

Can't wait to see fat Ronaldo draw out the teams.

 

Edited August 11, 2014 by Folski

[useless]

Whoever is managing the Dolphins needs to make sure they get plenty of water and stay cool. I've just read that they don't have sweat glands. Really struggling to see how they'll cope, it'll be really interesting though, that's for sure.