NurembergVillan

Click play on this video. Then click the Settings "Cog" in the bottom right. Then click Speed and select 0.5. Sit back, listen, and it all makes more sense.

Sounds like he's been back on the sauce to me...

I'm really enjoying being manager of Stoke! Started a game unemployed and replaced Hughes at the beginning of January in season 1. Finished 7th using a very slightly modified version of @Midfielder's tactic. Just started the 17/18 season after a big overhaul in the summer. Managed to get good money for Arnautovic, Joselu, Pieters, Bojan and Wollscheid so it set me up with a bit of a war chest! Trying to build a team with an English core and a few foreign flair players. New signings include Carl Jenkinson, Gary Cahill, Rob Holding, Charlie Taylor, Luke Garbutt, Kortney Hause, Fede, Borja San Emeterio, Youri Tielemans, Fabian Delph, Jordan Ibe, Serge Gnabry, Abel Hernandez, John Guidetti, Andre Dozzell, Ben Stevenson, Liam Mandeville and Lewis Cook. Apart from Tielemans, Hause and Cook the other well known players were transfer listed so I was able to pick them up for buttons compared to their real value. Cahill at £1.5m has been a steal so far!

This picture is quite funny in it's own right, but it's tweet that made me laugh.

Similarly, I received this email recently. I presume it was going to say "analysis". I didn't dare to find out...

What you gonna spend the pay-off on?

I was 38 last month. We're in it together.

Just bantz m8

In fact, 15 year old me still would. Even grown up would have a good think about how to get away with it.

Can you imagine what a monumental bell end he must have been at school? 15 year old me would've put dog shit in his briefcase.

As Shane Long would testify.

Can't wait to finish work and have a good read of this thread from @Midfielder "Oh boy" post on page 34. Be interested to see everyone's insights. I just started a game as unemployed and at the end of December was offered the jobs at Stoke and Valencia. As my nipper goes to nursery near Stockport I took the role at Stoke for an easier commute. And also as I want to see how many England internationals I can get into a squad, sprinkled with a few foreign stars. I've already got Butland, Berahino and Shawcross, but I think Johnson is done at international level. Have signed Jenkinson and Delph though. Usually Jones and Smalling become available in the first summer, and maybe I can get Wilshere and Will Hughes too. I had an Arsenal save where I built an awesome squad - Nainggolan in midfield, and Icardi up top. Icardi was bloody awful for me though, even though he seems to score loads everywhere else. Disappointing!

You missed an opportunity with Bumingham there!

He should see what Kerlon's up to these days and set up the football version of the Harlem Globetrotters.

Well, that's just made my week! Feel like a little kid, getting a Tweet from God!

Trump?

Robinson is 100% sub-human bastard

Irrespective of anything else, this is the main problem.

ENJOY!