Risso Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Chinese shopkeepers in Tenerife should really learn English , the poor woman said DECAFFEINATED !!!! Ooh look over there, it's that Irish footballer who plays for Aston Villa. Portly fellow, you know the one. And he seems to be standing in a refuse receptacle, how strange. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Risso Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 The nationalities joke that is. Maybe. Only bumders have stupid big pictures for their signatures though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Heathen! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Milfner Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Looks like Samuel Eto'o on the right. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 I was arrested at a recent football match for shouting at the opposition fans: "Oxidisation! Combustion! Ignition! Friction!" The police said my remarks were inflammatory. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Only bumders have stupid big pictures for their signatures though. Where's yours then? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 When I was younger I would lay in bed, and think about being a plumber. As I got older I realised they were just pipe dreams. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villaajax Posted May 20, 2011 Share Posted May 20, 2011 Bindunne by me Rob, page 288. Yeah and it wasn't funny then :notsure: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kurtsimonw Posted May 21, 2011 Share Posted May 21, 2011 "10 years, trillions of dollars, thousands of soldiers dead, state of the art technology, but the US finally found Bin Laden... ...In his house." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Villa56 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 A London Fire *In a run-down part of East London a fire destroyed a dilapidated four-storey house that had been divided into four flats.* A Nigerian family of six Internet con artists and full time benefit cheats lived on the first floor... all six tragically perished in the fire A group of seven Islamic welfare cheats, all illegally in the country, lived on the second floor... they too, all perished in the fire. Six Albanian, gang banger, ex-cons - all claiming political asylum and living off the state for free, occupied the 3rd floor...they too, died But the middle aged English white couple who lived on the top floor miraculously survived the fire. The Equal Opportunities Commission, Amnesty International, Rights activists, black community leaders and the British Islamic Council were all furious at the apparent racial inequality of the situation. Why was just the English white couple saved? It was monstrous they claimed, and showed that systemic 'racism' still existed in all areas of public service - questions were raised in the House of Commons, the popular media picked up the story and within hours it was national and indeed international news. Boris Johnson, Mayor of London, when questioned stated calmly that it would be unwise to jump to conclusions until the Police and Fire Service had completed their report. He closed by stating that he expected their initial assessment to be available within the next 36 hours – so perhaps it would be best to let the experts gather the evidence and report back before he commented any further. The baying Press pack subsequently reported the interview in such way as to intimate that the Mayor was indifferent to suffering and was out of touch with the feelings of the whole East London community! A large motorcade of representatives from all five groups, together withthe Home Secretary drove to the area, having demanded a meeting with the local chief fire officer. They made sure that a large pack of popular Press and TV had been briefed on the visit and so the motorcade was met by a huge gaggle of journalists, TV interviewers and cameras. On camera, they loudly demanded to know why the Africans, Black Muslims and Albanians all died in the fire and only the white couple lived. The bemused chief fire officer quietly replied ... They survived because both of them were out at Work Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted May 24, 2011 VT Supporter Share Posted May 24, 2011 BNP bollocks disguised as not funny "joke". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danwichmann Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 BNP bollocks disguised as not funny "joke". Very much this. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dante_Lockhart Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I lol'd Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danwichmann Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 I lol'd Racist :winkold: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 Why are women like toilets? They're either vacant, engaged, or full of shit Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 Carlo Ancelotti has just been offered a new 24 month contract - it comes with 600mins, unlimited texts and 1GB data Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 The Sun: 'Lady Gaga had 3 in bed session, but won't reveal sexes of those involved' At least we know there was one bloke. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 BBC News: Bad drivers to face £100 fines Seems a bit sexist. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Danwichmann Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 Why are women like toilets? They're either vacant, engaged, or full of shit That's older than the sun. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 24, 2011 Share Posted May 24, 2011 Even though we both speak the same language, it's amazing how there are some subtle differences between American-English and proper English: They say "sidewalk" we say "pavement" They say "pants" we say "trousers" They say "buried at sea" we say "naked and chained to a metal bed frame with a car battery connected to his bollocks whilst being beaten for answers". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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