Jon Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Frank Bruno has been arrested for attacking the boxer he lost his World Heavyweight Title fight with in 1986. Witherspoon? No, with a knife. I'm here all week. If you're here all week, Mr Rissworth, I'm off .... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Rissworth? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted May 10, 2011 VT Supporter Share Posted May 10, 2011 Rissworth?About two pound fifty. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
villa4europe Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Kate McCann has a lovely tan at the moment. I guess it's because she's been lying in the Sun all week stolen from sickipedia Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jon Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Rissworth? copyright by yourself, I believe! :winkold: I always though your version of his name was better than the original. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Risso Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 Me too, I've changed my name by deed poll. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 In my defence, I had been reading about a revelation to someone in a cafe in Rickmansworth hence the error. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mjmooney Posted May 10, 2011 VT Supporter Share Posted May 10, 2011 In my defence, I had been reading about a revelation to someone in a cafe in Rickmansworth hence the error."I've just been in Hertfordshire negotiating the payment for the role of Severus Snape in the new Harry Potter film". "Rickmansworth?" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tonyh29 Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 You know it's time to stop playing football manager when you become the Celtic boss and refuse to open any of your mail in the morning. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
theunderstudy Posted May 10, 2011 Share Posted May 10, 2011 And NO-ONE got that reference. :cry: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BOF Posted May 13, 2011 Moderator Share Posted May 13, 2011 F1 driver takes out injunction F1 driver takes out injunction The ongoing injunction controversy continued today with news that a mystery Formula 1 driver has taken out a court order forbidding mention of certain aspects of his life. The driver’s identity cannot be revealed but he is believed to be from Germany and to drive for a UK-based team. The legal order prevents any mention of key elements of the un-named person’s career, specifically anything relating to the 2011 season so far. The mystery driver, said to be 42 years old and a multiple world champion, is believed to have taken out the injunction in order to prevent a British newspaper from publishing allegations that he had become ‘shit’. Rumours circulating on social networking site Twitter also suggest that the anonymous driver – said to have a silver car and a brother called Ralf – has been publicly **** by his team mate. Those close to the unidentified driver, whose initials are MS, are said to have advised him to break off the unsuitable relationship that is at the heart of the unmentionable and embarrassing rumours. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC_Hitz Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Brılliant. Particularly like the part about: in order to prevent a British newspaper from publishing allegations that he had become ‘shit’. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 An immigrant was trying to pick the lock on my car boot the other day. I told him "You behave yourself word removed, you're in there for a reason" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Two friends are fishing near a bridge. Suddenly a hearse and two funeral cars go over the bridge. One of the men stands up, takes off his cap and bows his head. When the cars have gone he puts his cap back on, sits back down and carries on fishing. His mate turns to him and says "Mate that's one of the nicest most respectful things I've ever seen." He replies "Well, we were married for nearly 20 years." Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Went for my routine check-up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my arse. Think I might change dentists... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC_Hitz Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Went for my routine check-up today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my arse. Think I might change dentists... Christ's chin, did you get that off the back of a cigarette card? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Stop complaining, "Turkish Delight" ;-) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AVFC_Hitz Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 You should see it to believe it... :winkold: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
GarethRDR Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Two friends are fishing near a bridge. Suddenly a hearse and two funeral cars go over the bridge. One of the men stands up, takes off his cap and bows his head. When the cars have gone he puts his cap back on, sits back down and carries on fishing. His mate turns to him and says "Mate that's one of the nicest most respectful things I've ever seen." He replies "Well, we were married for nearly 20 years." 1971 called for you. It wants it's joke book back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rjw63 Posted May 13, 2011 Share Posted May 13, 2011 Get back to your shite music! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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