GarethRDR

*ahem* Thom Lancastere, thank you very much.

You're either clinically insane or a SHA fan (mind you, the two do go hand-in-hand).

Because he would have told them Rooney's outburst was Stewart Downing's fault somehow.

Niiiiiiice. I will get on Hello Nasty immediately. 8)

I'm hoping for a Downing/Lazarus-like rise to prominence next season for Makoun. The ingredients are there, just needs to get used to being baked at a higher temperature.

ITV seem to be playing it in all their ads at the moment. I don't have a problem with this.

By that logic, Mark Crossley is the greatest keeper to grace the game.

Dark (but don't tell the missus).

^I'll happily blow his trumpet too (giggity). Harmison Agonistes is brilliant.

Not heard about Super 8, so I just went for quick read-up... It's Within the Woods!

That's disgusting... I'm calling the Canine Defence League.

This one might require more lyrical aptitude then the average football chanter possesses, nevertheless: (to the tune of Hakunamatata) Makoun-he-will-tw@-ya, with a two-footed lunge. Makoun-he-will-tw@-ya better get that magic sponge. So you'd best hurry or you won't walk for days, his jumper might be gay but he'll still make you pay Makoun-he-will-tw@-ya.

Oh, we guessed it was.

How dare you besmerch the good name of Paul Johnson, sir!

Hey, that's a good thing to be spending your money on though.

Your mother is a kind women. Hi-oh!

A man's gotta have priorities.

No siree.

2 hours ago, there were 2 things that had never happened to me before in my life; 1 - break/dislocation of any bones 2 - being given laughing gas All fine now, but **** me laughing gas is amazing. Apparently my girlfriend has never heard me bellow so loudly, and when I was prompted by the nurse on if I was feeling pain I managed to respond mid-laugh that "I've never known pain like it, but I don't care!". Was bloody shown up outside the X-ray theatre though; I get my injury having a kickabout with some mates and I'm sat there weeping like a sissy, when this 11 year old girl who plays for Reading is brought in with a shoulder fracture after helping her team see off Chelsea girls-under 11 team 4-2. Well and truly upstaged! Every cloud does indeed have a silver lining, though; as there'll be no self-abuse for a few months, I've been promised handy-jays on request. 8)

Jobs are funny things, aren't they? You get made redundant before Xmas, spend 3 months sat on your arse without a sniff and then all of a sudden 2 offers come in at once.

Between his bell-end of a father and thief/thug of a half-brother, Sean and the Wright boys really are skidmarks on the toilet bowl of football.

Esteemed? Venerable?

Always with "wench", preferably followed with "taste my slipper-based wrath with your spam-lips".

Ah, nothing keeps 'em quiet like a good ol' word removed-punt.