leemond2008

Yeah she has definitely seen the parrots beak

bit late on that one old chap

I dont say sorry to any one cuz I am never wrong and when I am I wont admit it

CRACKING IDEA GARETH it wouldn't be anything pervy of course, purely a celebration of the female form...and in order to celebrate that they must be wearing very little

snap, our's starts at 3 and come 5pm we are free to fook off and do what we want

I do my fair bit for charities just when it's at work and it's "dress down for £1" or "buy a ridiculously overpriced cake" or "guess how many jelly beans are in the jar" and shit like that I don't ge involved in. As I say I donate money on a monthly basis to three charities, not a lot granted but I give what I can

actually last year I discovered that baileys and jagermeister goes together perfectly....I had forgot about that, I'll have to get myself a bottle of baileys for tomorrow nights drink as well

depends how much whiskey or brandy you add to it

see no matter who I am sat next to tomorrow I will end up sitting in silence and enjoying my own company and getting pissed off with them because they will no doubt want to converse with other people around the table that I don't like (and who they don't like as well for that matter) and will try and drag me into the conversation so I would much rather keep my head down fill my belly and **** off as quickly as possible

I wouldn't bollock inanimate objects at all, I would just shake my head and tut at them, then when I made camp for the night I would go over the day's events with Vincent and explain to him why I was pissed off with said objects and Vincent would listen to every word and eventually learn how to speak doglish and slowly evolve into a half dog half man type creature that can walk (albeit unsteadily) on his back two legs and we would roam the earth planning day to day how we would live our lives whilst hunting rabbits and the few remaining humans then I would find a lone surviving female and take her as my partner (she has no say in the matter) and our relationship would blossom, Vincent would get jealous and run off and start an army of dogmanish creatures with a stray jack russel, we will go to war I will win then I will befriend a monkey named Poppy and move to the jungle and see out the rest of my day's with her and her monkey family

ok I am pre-empting my rant for tomorrow its the team meal and a standard 3 course christmas menu so it wont be anything special but I guarantee that by 11 o'clock at least 4 people will have said ''I am starving but I'm not going to have any breakfast because I don't want to spoil my meal tonight' I recon that by 10:30 I will be popping into this thread to confirm that this has pissed me off, has any one ever predicted what will piss them off in this thread before??? I for one will be enjoying a bacon egg and black pudding sandwich for breakfast and maybe a cheeky little baguette at lunch time as well for the record the team meal is at 4:00pm

maybe not everyone loves them but they seem to have hit that patch where music fans and chavs like them I mite stick that god and satan song on now actually

I refuse to give to any charity raising evet at work because in my 9 or 10 years of working at the place they have never once raised money for any charity involving animals which I think is unfair

scenario 1 - eating a bacon and egg sandwich you-so how do you feel about life at this exact moment exhibit A-I feel pretty **** good about it, I am getting free food scenario 2- eating a sandwich with a beer shit filling you-so how do you feel about life at this exact moment exhibit B - pretty shit to be honest

is his dog named Vincent? if it is then I will have to come up with a new post apocalyptic dog name

Apart from the fact that I am not black and wouldn't mope around all day at being alone....and I would not have allowed that to happen to my dog then yeah maybe

Yep I am fully aware of that but I am used to pulling my own Christmas cracker so there is no problem there

rod stewart - only a hobo

I dont moan all that much, things just annoy me and I voice my opinion, today is the first time I have ventured into the 'things that piss me off' thread in months. I just enjoy my own company and people annoy me in general, that is why I think it would be good fun to be completely on my own with nothing more than a guitar and a dog named Vincent

I really do hope the world ends, not like over in an instant but things slowly start to go to shit and I would love to be one of the last people left, I often think that, I just think it would be a good crack

I know that every one loves the Biff and I don't mind them all that much to be honest (I have one of their albums and it goes on every now and again, the one with ''I talk to god as much as I talk to satan'' on it) are they any good live? I don't know why they just always strike me as the sort of band who can produce decent studio albums but would be quite poor live.

I would be quite happy with 13 to be honest. Then again I am quite the homeboy, only ever been abroad once, to Spain when I was 4 and I got the chicken pox after the second day so the miniscule bits I do remember about it aint that great. I know bucket loads of stuff but knowing where Macedonia is on a map isn't something I would take pride in telling someone, I know a bit about places just not where they are

5, I am getting better

4 out of 37 countries in Europe...lets go again

I am absolute gash at geography and have had a few beers...if anything I am hoping that will boost my chances because I am really really terrible I'll let you know how I get on