I couldn't not post this, it had me laughing out loud. From a fictional villa fm story. Connolly is the fictional managers name, though I guess you'd figure that out.
http://www.fmscout.com/q-7170-The-Lions-of-Aston-Villa--Becoming-King-of-the-Jungle-Once-More.html?d=2\
The second thing should be in a quote box, but i scewed that up.
The Boardroom
LERNER: "Welcome gentlemen, how are you both?" CONNOLLY: "Not too bad, thanks." CANTONA: "A leetle tipsy." LERNER: "Professional as always Eric." "Anyway, as you can see from my e-mail, Celtic have made an approach for you, Jason. Their chairman, Desmond White is holding a press conference later today after he relieves Neil Lennon from his duties. Second place and seven points off the pace in a league minus Rangers is unacceptable in his eyes." "He's offered us £2.5m in compensation for you." CANTONA: "£2.5m??? That ees an eensult, get him on ze phone now!!!" LERNER: "Eric, calm down... Jason, your thoughts?" CONNOLLY: "Randy, I love this club, I've been a supporter since I was a boy. So was my dad. We are going places and I have no intention of leaving, I signed a three year deal and that will be honoured. LERNER: "Exactly what I wanted to hear.... Eric, are you crying?" CANTONA: "Non, I just have some something in my eye!" CONNOLLY: You look like you're crying. LERNER: Yeah, you do. CANTONA: "Ooooh, so ze enigmatic Frenchman has to be devoid of feelings?" "If you must know, that is ze most beautiful thing I have heard uttered in this boardroom, Jason!" "Your loyalty is second to none, just vonderful. You are a marvellous human being and I respect you for staying true to your club." Cantona storms out, unable to hold back any more tears. LERNER: "What a fruitcake." CONNOLLY: "I know. But he means well." "Anyway boss, I need to kick on and get the lads ready for Burnley, see you soon." LERNER: "See you later." Connolly exits. A pleased Lerner flicks the projector screen on and Gangnam Style comes pounding through the speakers. LERNER: (To self) No one is around and I've just kept hold of the brightest young manager in the world.... "OPPA GANGNAM STYLE!!!!" The American business tycoon, in a moment of pure joy, kicks out of his chair and dances to the music... Connolly re-enters the room. CONNOLLY: "Just left my phone on the desk boss!" LERNER: "Jason... I was just.... Ehhh...." Connolly shuts door and leaves.