TheSufferingVilla

Welcome back General and happy 4th of July!

And manager

She looks like she's been shot at point blank range by Homer's make-up gun: Seriously she must use turpentine to get it off at night. I wouldn't kick her out of bed but to be fair she's isn't in the same league as Jessica Alba or Scarlett Johansson. Blokes are a fickle bunch, if you keep telling them that "X" bird is hot soon enough they'll start believing it even if not true.

Oh high and mighty BOF will I have a hangover tomorrow morning?

No contest, God vs Man. Man doesn't have a chance.

I went with Gerd Muller my old mans choice. Probably one of the least athletic players to ever grace the game but what gift god gave him was surely the most lethal combination of positional awareness and finishing ability. His record speaks for itself 68 goals in 62 games for Germany undoubtedly the most clinical striker the game has ever known despite being an average footballer. But goals make forwards not fancy tricks and Muller is the greatest.

The Southside Chicago slum I have to visit for work tomorrow. You guys think Baltimore in the Wire is bad?

I'm not sure but what I am sure of is that all three wipe their arses standing up.

Pringles made by a company that produces tampons, toothpaste, batteries and nappies. Should be sold on the household cleaning goods aisle.

Barry. No question.

I'm amazed by how close this is, perhaps somebody could do a study to see on this. What kind of a PHD would I need to do in order to title my thesis "How do you wipe yer arse?"

Question to you sitters. Have any of you experienced a German toilet, i.e: one that uses "the shelf"? When shitting into such toilets your crap falls onto a shelf mere inches from the place your arse is suspended. It is believed German's use "the shelf" to examine thier crap to ensure it is of uniform size and shape and if not they then adjust their diets accordingly to shit more efficiently. My point being if you are a sitter and were to use the shelf the ods are pretty high that upon dropping your hand down there with the paper for a swipe you will no doubt make hard contact with the shit on the shelf. thoughts? Comments?

Interesting, question to "Sitters" is this a standard technique? I had assumed sitters wiped from the rear?

Bizarro thread of the week candidate but believe it or not this is really bugging me. I've always stepped off the throne to wipe my arse, ever since I was a lad. never considered any other way of doing it. however since I moved to America where the toilet cubicle offers about as much privacy as taking a shit in a phone box I've noticed that the natives wipe their arses whilst sitting down. Now before you wonder how such a thing is noticed, it initially came from a bizarre assumption that Americans never actually wiped their holes. In the early days of my 6-year residency in Mad World I noticed whilst waiting to shite that in most cases the person already sitting on the shitter would go from the sitting position to standing flushing and leaving in a very disturbingly short timeframe. In my mind this simply equated to the filthy bastards not cleaning up. However at one point I was leaving the cubicle in a pub when some bloke in the queue says to me "Dude, you clean yourself standing up! I've never seen that", my usual reaction to such an outrage would be to firmly belt the sick bastard with my fist for so closely scrutinising my bathroom etiquite. However, understanding the aparent Engineering impossibility that an American could design a cubicle door that doesn't have at least a 4 inch gap either side of it, I let this one slip to simply ponder the question. Am I weird for wiping my arse whilst standing up?

So if a T-rex tries to swallow a Bear and chokes does that single Bear win?

T-Rex 1 - Bear Grylls 0

20 million?

my post from the other thread.

with due respect, Petrov has never been, or never will be a 'great' player. he just doesn't bring enough to the table This is our pundit who a year ago was constantly banging on about how Petrov is shit, always has been shit and always will be shit. Despite the evidence this season I somehow doubt he will deviate from his earlier position.

Really House isn't on over there? I find that really surprising as it's one of the highest rated shows on US telly.

The word dull? I assume you didn't watch the two Quater-Final legs between Chelsea and liverpool cause they were two of the most exciting games I've even seen, not too mention this game wasn't half bad.

Mike not to answer for the General but I think you will find it was Nike who were holding most of the cards when they negotiated for the shirt deal, Nike wanted to produce a new kit every season Villa had to agree otherwise we'd be wearing kits made by Errea or somebody else crap.