Designer1

Bowyer, the nasty snarling little Ratboy bitch.

1971. Clockwork Orange. :wink:

Berserker on the Atari!

Having owned both PS2 and XBox I can honestly say that I love both for different reasons (just get the splinters out me arse). The Xbox is technically superior and Rev is right about the 5.1, it's fantastic and unnerving particularly when there are bullets flying around your head. :shock: I've also played a fair bit of GameCube and am looking forward to a good session on Resi 4. Someone on here seems to like that one a bit :wink: The only reason I would personally give the PS2 the edge is for the four weeks solid that I played GTAIII on it's rather inconspicuous release (skiving off four days from work in the process). I have been a gamer for 25 years and still nothing has come close to those four weeks for sheer entertainment and violent bliss. So, it's obviously a very personal choice but in the end mine comes down to the bare bones of overall enjoyment. PS2 by a whisker for me.

I got a phone call from a gorgeous ex-girlfriend of mine the other day. We lost track of time, chatting about the wild nights we used to enjoy together. I couldn't believe it when she asked if I'd like to meet up and maybe rekindle a little of that magic. "Wow!", I said, "I don't know if I could keep pace with you now! I'm a bit older and a bit balder than when you last saw me!" She giggled and said she was sure I'd meet the challenge! "Yeah", I said, "just so long as you don't mind a man with a waistband that's a few inches wider these days!" She laughed and told me to stop being so silly! She teased me, saying that she thought tubby bald men were cute! "Anyway", "I've put on a couple of pounds myself!" she giggled... ...so I told her to f*ck off.

Zola for me. Not only a consumate pro, he was an excellent footballer.

Got to be God for me.

I voted GB, seems to have a level head. Overeaction? :wink:

Of the movies mentioned I like the look of Be Cool. Sin City looks good from a style point of view, but I always find it's the ones that creep up out of nowhere like Closer and Sideways that turn out to be the gems. Oh, and of course anything by my man Takashi Miike.

We have to stand by Tommy. All the best keepers make ricks from time to time. Don't think dropping him and putting the Postman in would solve anything.

Steve McQueen is cooler but Newman's the better actor imo.

Two Old Pensioners Two old pensioners are taking a trip down memory lane by going back to the place where they first met. Sitting at a café, the little old man says, "Remember the first time I met you over 50 years ago? We left this cafe, went round the corner behind the gas works, and I gave you one from behind." "Why, yes, I remember it well, dear," replies the little old lady with a grin. "Well, for old time's sake, let's go there again and I'll give you one from behind." The two pensioners pay their bill and leave the cafe. A young man sitting next to them has overheard the conversation and smiles to himself, thinking it would be quite amusing to see two old pensioners at it. He gets up and follows them. Sure enough, he sees the two pensioners near the gas works. The little old lady pulls off her knickers and lifts up her dress. The old man pulls down his pants and grabs the lady's hips, and the little old lady reaches for the fence. Well, what follows is 40 minutes of the most athletic sex the man has ever seen. The little old man is banging away at the little old woman at a pace that can only be described as phenomenal. Limbs are flying everywhere, the movement is a blur, and they do not stop for a single second. Finally, they collapse and don't move for an hour. Well, the man is stunned. Never in his life has he ever seen anything that equates to this -- not in the movies, not from his friends, not from his own experiences. Reflecting on what he has just seen, he says to himself, "I have to know his secret. If only I could sh@g like that now, let alone in 50 years' time!" The two old pensioners have by this time recovered and dressed themselves. Plucking up courage, the man approaches the pensioner. He says, "Sir, in all my life I have never seen anybody sh@g like that, particularly at your age. What's your secret? Could you sh@g like that 50 years ago?" The pensioner replies, "Son, 50 years ago, that f*****g fence wasn't electrified."

A YOUNG MAN CALLED PETER INVITED HIS MOTHER FOR DINNER. DURING THE COURSE OF THE MEAL, HIS MOTHER COULDN'T HELP BUT NOTICE HOW HANDSOME PETER'S FLATMATE WAS. SHE HAD LONG BEEN SUSPICIOUS OF A RELATIONSHIP BETWEEN THE TWO, AND THIS ONLY MADE HER MORE CURIOUS. OVER THE COURSE OF THE EVENING, WHILE WATCHING THE TWO INTERACT,SHE STARTED TO WONDER IF THERE WAS MORE BETWEEN PETER AND HIS FLATMATE THAN MET THE EYE. READING HIS MUM'S THOUGHTS, PETER VOLUNTEERED, "I KNOW WHAT YOU MUST BE THINKING, BUT I ASSURE YOU, SIMON & I ARE JUST FLATMATES. ABOUT A WEEK LATER, SIMON CAME TO PETER SAYING,"EVER SINCE YOUR MOTHER CAME TO DINNER, I'VE BEEN UNABLE TO FIND THE FRYING PAN, YOU DON'T SUPPOSE SHE TOOK IT DO YOU?" "WELL, I DOUBT IT, BUT I'LL E-MAIL HER JUST TO BE SURE," SAID PETER, SO HE SAT DOWN AND WROTE: DEAR MOTHER, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID" TAKE THE FRYING PAN FROM MY HOUSE, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DID NOT" TAKE THE FRYING PAN, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IT HAS BEEN MISSING EVER SINCE YOU WERE HERE FOR DINNER. LOVE PETER SEVERAL DAYS LATER, PETER RECEIVED AN E-MAIL FROM HIS MOTHER WHICH READ: DEAR SON, I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO" SLEEP WITH SIMON, AND I'M NOT SAYING THAT YOU "DO NOT" SLEEP WITH SIMON, BUT THE FACT REMAINS THAT IF HE WAS SLEEPING IN HIS OWN BED, HE WOULD HAVE FOUND THE FRYING PAN BY NOW. LOVE MUM LESSON OF THE DAY: DON'T EVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER ( SHE ALWAYS,ALWAYS FINDS OUT)

Agree with that. Oh, and welcome to VT Lee.

Your not wrong there. Remember when he tried to play Dorke, Collywobble and Savo up front at the same time? Disaster. Didn't we get tonked 5 or 6 by someone (Blackburn?)

Got to be Little for me. Or as the old man calls him 'The Pudding'. I think it's a reference to his hairstyle as a player.

Of course he exists. Otherwise who is bringing the myriad of presents to my two daughters tonight...hang on...my wife is just telling me something about the shops being shut...

"You know somedays, you just can't get rid of a bomb!" Classic stuff! Especially the rubber shark.

Spot on. I'll get me coat.

Peep Show for me. Little Britain has been good but not as good as the first two series.

Hellboy. Great entertainment!

Woman walks into a Newcastle hairdresser's.... and asks "Can I have a perm please?" "Aye, nee problem pet. Ah wandered lernley as a clood....."

Mr Angel for me.

Can't agree with that Doug. Every time I see Rooney play he always seems to look for a defense splitter pass as well as going for goal himself. He comes deep quite often too, unlike the overly hyped Defoe.