ChrisVillan

Why do we have to be playing a top 5 team to get a performance out of the buggers? I'd suggest that needs addressing.

Still think he should go. Sorry.

VillaTalk regulars uncover Richard's stash of O'Leary quotes.

Well, why not. drat01 thinks of what might have been as transfer window closes. After countless requests, Doug Ellis finally provides his vision of where Aston Villa will be in five years' time. TimTheVillan sets up his new firing range. Birmingham City fan calls the Vatican after seeing Steve Bruce's image in the arse of a fat bird. The Mods discuss the next front page column. Laughing_Gravity tries out his new larynx box by saying "Exterminate."

Arsenal - Great to watch at times. Discipline is piss poor and they have a number of petulant little shits starting to creep in their side. But watching Henry is just brilliant and Van Persie's a cracking player too. And they're not winning all the time these days so it's hard to hate them the most. Chelsea - My choice for most hated. Not only did they buy the title but their luck is unbelievable. They get given loads of free kicks and penalties and the number of deflected goals they get is unreal. People talk about Lampard's goal return as if it didn't come largely from dubious penalties. Throw into the mix the overrated Robben, Nigel "Carvalho" Planer playing centre half and that scumbag Essien and they're easy to hate. Liverpool - I do hate them a bit, but it's mostly to do with their fans and the BBC constantly juicing over them. I think they have some excellent players and have become a very good team very quickly. Some good passing and it's all down to Rafa Benitez, who I think is the best manager in the League on his showing so far. Man United - Large amount of residual hatred from the 90s - Ince, Keane, Hughes, Cantona - when they really did my nut, and we didn't have Blose to hate because they were down where they belong. Ferguson is a right bastard and a few of the players are arseholes. But Rooney and Neville (no, really) are world class. Good keeper, good full backs when Heinze's in, good defence as a unit when Ferdinand can be bothered. Weak in midfield. All in all less scummy than they used to be. When they play their one-touch game it's a great thing to watch. So, in summary - Chelsea.

Oldie but a goodie Sheriff!

Bugger. Nice to know the mods and admins are all so grown up.

I'll give you a helping hand John, by posting my theory that Doug inherited a precious calculator and refuses to let it go. However, this calculator is faulty, and Doug's too senile to notice.

No chance. I think we should all get back on topic now, cheers.

Preaching to the converted on the O'Leary front LBJ.

Don't have to convince me of that mate. I think it also comes down to the general state of the club though and that's down to Doug. Even O'Leary might be able to drag us out of this mess if he had a better basis to go from.

Dave - if relegation is avoidable don't you think it becomes a big deal? If we get relegated because of a situation in which a stubborn old man squeezes the club so hard that we go down?

Meanwhile, in Glasgow, production begins on the world's biggest Irn-Bru bar.

You know the script by now... IainG banishes SFF from VillaTalk. JohnCresswell and limpid don full costume to pitch the VT Panto 2006. ahamaad vows to never work a lonely night shift again. Toonlass ends date with RantinRob to play stupid games with Rocket from Soccer AM. Man with torch sees gobstopper in the distance. Herbert Douglas Ellis, Officer of the British Empire

Best. Typo. Ever.

It's that time of the day again... "Look Stridey, if I stand here I can cover the letters R and A!" Chances of Doug selling AVFC revealed. pablopicasso's tennis partner informs him that West Ham are shit. John Hartson is not happy with his second effort in the Camp Shot Put. drat01 receives an email from biglad and is furious with his choice of car for their race. Ruud Van Nistelrooy.

avfcinwales announces to gathered Villans that he is converting to Crystal Palace "because their name starts with five consonants."

And it's disappeared.

I love that show. I presume you mean because I wouldn't get any work done.

Just answering a question Al

I seriously think at the time of signing Milosevic was a bargain, given form in the previous season, age, and the state of the market.

Milosevic

LancsVillan belatedly has his film developed from Christmas party.

Cracking stuff!

trimandson's tambourine practice is interrupted when a microphone is thrown at him.