Ooh-Ah

Anyone calling for Bannan to be left out on purely footballing grounds needs their head examined. He's easily the most naturally gifted footballer to come through the ranks in my lifetime. He always wants the ball, he's composed when he gets it and he rarely gives it away. I honestly think that if he was at a bigger club, or if he was English, the media would be all over him. Whatever about those halfwits it's a shame that some of his own supporters can't spot or don't appreciate technical brilliance when it's staring them in the face. Some people on here would obviously rather a midfield made up entirely of 6ft-plus, aerially dominant, box-to-box athletes. He's been a ray of light in an otherwise underwhelming season and while his misdeeds shouldn't be condoned (obviously), we need to get him back in the team as soon as possible. Please.

Major League asshole, though, and I think Randy prefers more cerebral, less abrasive personalities. That's why Fat Sam or Martin Jol won't get the job either. It'll be someone like Klinnsman or Rijkaard. Van Gaal would be quality. If what you say is true about Randy then I doubt Rafael Benitez would get the job as well. I'm sure Rafa would be as good as gold for a reasonable, straight chairman like Lerner. ... but not for an irrational, homosexual chairman like Hicks?

Its 18m with conditional add ons. That retort has more or less become my catchphrase.

CAN'T........! TAKE.......! THE... IRONY.........!

Just a quick question... How is it that the BBC website reckons we had 55% possession, yet Sky seem to think we only had 48.6%?

'Soccer' is just as legitimate a term for association football as 'football' is. It originates from an abbreviation of association, 'assoc', which mutated into 'socca' and later to 'soccer'. All of this happened many, many moons ago. The idea that the word 'soccer' is some abhorrent American bastardisation is a phallacy. Many English speaking countries, such as Australia, Ireland and the USA, have more than one type of 'football'. (Aussie Rules, Gaelic Football, Gridiron.) The word 'football' in these countries has always been used to describe the native sport. Therefore, the use of the word 'soccer' is necessary in order to differentiate between the different codes. Just because the use of a certain word is the norm in England doesn't mean that that it should be the norm for all English speaking countries. (P.S. I really don't want Bob Bradley to be our next manager, but for reasons more meaningful than his vocabulary.)

Getting rid of Heskey would be delightful. Heskey out, Keane in, Milner out, Ireland in? With a couple more signings, and if we convinced someone (ANYONE!) to take Sidwell off our hands, we might actually be facing into the new season with an improved squad. Maybe the world isn't over after all.

The prospect of getting Martin Jol (and Ireland) is the only thing keeping my spirits up at the moment. Don't think Sven would be AS bad as some people seem to think, but the other names mentioned would be a massive step in the wrong direction. Curbishley? Southgate? How embarrassing would that be? Really hope we're singing 'Martin Jol's claret and blue army!' against Newcastle.

James Milner was the Übermensch what Nietzsche was on about.

S. Carson: (To tune of "Quando, Quando, Quando") 'When will you sign up for us? Tell me Carson, Carson, Carson. We are gonna win the league, Please don't go back to the Scouse.' M. Laursen: (To tune of "I Can't Get No Satisfaction") 'Doo doo, doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo doo, Doo doo, doo doo doo, doo doo doo doo doo, You can't get past, Martin Laursen. Pure Danish class, Martin Laursen. And they've tried, and they've tried, and they've tried, and they've tried, But they can't get past...' I. Osbourne: (To tune of "Cecelia") 'Oh Isiah, You're breaking up play, you're better than Claude Makèlèlè. Oh Isiah, I'm up to your knee, You're twenty foot three you're a giant' (To tune of "Vieira") 'Isiah, woah-oh, Isiah, woah-oh, Look up and you will see, He's bigger than a tree, Isiah, woah-oh, Isiah, woah-oh...' C. Gardner: (To tune of "Amore") 'He's genuine class, He can volley and pass, Craigy Gardner. He covers the grass, He'll put you on your ass, Craigy Gardner' N. Reo-Coker: (To tune of "Rooney, Rooney...) 'Reo, Reo...' A. Young: (To tune of "There's only one...") 'Better than Ronaldo, Ashley's better than Ronaldo, Better than Ronaldo, Ashley's better than Ronaldo' G. Agbonlahor: (To tune of "There's only one...") 'Faster than a cheetah, Gabby's faster than a cheetah, Faster than a cheetah, Gabby's faster than a cheetah' More to come, I'm tired!

Its probably been brought up before, but what about giving someone a megaphone like they do in the Bernebeu. A lot of these songs are class but I can't see anyone having the testicular fortitude to start them. A question for the General perhaps?

"Should've gone to Specsavers."

There's a difference between the Craig Bellamy/Dennis Wise bite and the Joey 'Why not quench a lit cigar in some young fella's eye' Barton bite. Don't like him, don't rate him(that highly), don't want him. Doubt MON, board or players do either.

I would take SWP over 90% of the players being linked on this thread. Perfect match in my view.

My only critique of this is that surely it should be Olenjik instead of Henderson? You're correct of course, my apologies.

The Aston Villa squad on the 1st of September 2007 will be... GK Boruc Taylor/Henderson D Bouma Cahill Distin Laursen McShane Mellberg Young M Barry Berger Davis Gardner Maloney Petrov Reo-Coker Young Wright-Phillips F Agbonlahor Bent Carew Moore D'you wanna fight about it?

I'd probably internally combust if we signed Ribery. No, scratch that, I'd definitely internally combust. Promise.

I suppose all footballers are babies.

I'd take McShane. He's got Tim Flowers-like bottle. Not a bad defender either. I'd rate him higher than Bardsley, Hughes, maybe even Ridge. He'd be an immediate fan favourite too.

Sorenson Taylor/Henderson Jagielka Distin Laursen Mellberg Cahill Ridgewell Bouma Alves Wright-Phillips Young Petrov Parker/Reo-Coker Barry Maloney Gardner Davis Carew Agbonlahor Bent Moore

What's wrong with Tommy? He's hardly made a mistake all year. Definitely won us more points than he's lost us. I'd rate him as one of the best in the league. Not as good as Cech, van der Sar or Reina but not many are. Anyway, I'd imagine Gordon would choose Arse over us so if they're after him we can forget about it. Boruc is good but I wouldn't rate him higher than Tommy.

On the topic of singing, here's my suggestion for the clubs new anthem (In tune of 'Mack the Knife- http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CBTITHA8twI ) Oh the Villa, had a great team, Back in Nineteen-eighty-two, We had conquered all of England, And all of Europe too Then the Villa disappeared for Twenty-five years without a trace, But now Villa have been reborn, The old regime's been replaced Under Randy and Martin O'Neill, The new Villa has set sail, No more heartbreak or frustration, The new Villa will prevail! VILLA! (clap clap clap) VILLA! (clap clap clap) etc. What do you reckon General? Better than the original?

Hero as a person. Flop as a player. One good season isn't enough. I genuinely don't understand how 71% can say he's a Villa hero.

Milner is a better player than SWP at the moment. Plus, one is on the way up, one is on the way down. Fair point, but at their best who would you rather? SWP is on the way down because his gaffer doesn't rate/like him. I think he could do the business for us.

Don't let Luke go! He's quality I tells ya. Re: RM Don't think Milner's good enough, AY's got more potential and can play there. Depending on how much cash we have, still think SWP is worth a punt. I know everyone thinks he's sh*t because he's not doing it at Chelsea but he was top class at Manc. I reckon he'd relish playing at a smaller club where he'd be the centre of attention again.